Bill Cammack

OK fellas… This is VERY important! Get in the habit of putting that toilet seat DOWN after you’ve hannled yo biznezz in the bathroom. DOWN! There are several reasons for this……

First of all, if your girl happens to be “slim of lower body proportion” or just so happens to ‘not have an ass’, she can fall into the toilet bowl. This is not good. :( You will lose 30 minutes to an hour of physical access to her as she jumps in the shower and attempts to SCRUB perceived toilet-bowl-water-droplets out of the very PORES of her ass! :D Tremendous waste of your “quality time” together.

On top of that, she may very well be skeeved out by the fact that she was just sitting inside the toilet bowl. :D Even when she actually lets you touch her again, she’s going to be replaying falling into the bowl over and over and scrubbing in the shower over and over.

What’s worse is that YOU will be penalized for messing with her! :O She’s looking at you with horror, wondering “how can he STAND to touch toilet-girl? YUCK!” Instead of you getting credit for accepting her as-is, she’s now wondering how many other toilet-girls you’ve tried to cuddle with in your dating career.

Aside from messing up your physical action, :( leaving the seat up has a mental effect on her too. She’s going to think one of two things… or both. Either you A) weren’t thinking about her when you were in the bathroom and didn’t consider any NEED to put the toilet seat down, or B) you don’t give a damn whether she falls in or not! :D Neither one is a winning position for YOU.

You need to give her the impression that you’re thinking about her ALL.THE.TIME! All day, every day, when you’re at work, when you’re at the soda shoppe with the skating waitresses, when you’re hanging out with Beyonce, when Hef passes you a few Playboy Bunnies and EVEN when you’re in the bathroom. HER, HER, HER… you’re ALWAYS thinking about HER! So… leaving the seat up is a tremendous faux pas and you’ve blundered the position.

Now… if she figures you don’t give a damn whether she falls in the toilet or not, she thinks you either A) don’t care about her, or B) you think it’s funny when she becomes toilet-girl and you laugh about it behind your back and tell your friends. :D No wins for you there, so keep that toilet seat DOWNNNN!!! to make sure you maximize your quality time with your wife/girlfriend/date/whatever.

Well… Either that… or……

Measure the bowl and make sure you only date girls with an ass wide enough for her to not fall in regardless. :/

Oh… don’t bother reminding her that it’s all her fault that she fell in the bowl and sat in the water, because she should have LOOKED before sitting down. Read this if you want to know why not. :D

DatingGenius