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Pretty Girls – Too Unapproachable?
Hey Derek. Thanks for the question! :D
Yes. There’s double truth in your statement. Pretty girls are perceived to be unapproachable, AND there are lots of pretty girls without men because of this issue.
See, first of all, girls are girls. :D When you live somewhere like Japan, there isn’t much difference between the girls, so they all have a chance to get guys. This leads to them being more approachable because they don’t develop a perceived superiority to the other girls.
In the USA, there’s a VAST DIFFERENCE between the looks of the girls. :D There are a few that are really attractive and a lot that are just totally busted. :D What happens here is that all the guys chase after the attractive girls and give them anything they want. This goes to the attractive girls’ heads, and they get this inflated sense of self-worth…. Until they hit 19 and their bodies stop maintaining themselves on their own. When this happens, if they don’t start working out, they get out of shape and become has-beens. :) This is when you see the zombie-like girls that you can tell used to be fine, but now they stumble around town opening their own doors and not having anyone rap to them in the streets or try to pay for them to eat or buy clothes. :D They are now experiencing what life is like for most of the population, and it’s pretty depressing for them.
Until that happens, though… They’re held up as the best of the best of American society. There’s nothing better than a fine chick, so they get everything they want and everyone listens to them and wants to be their friends. Because of this, MANY fine girls get conceited. They act bitchy towards people because they know they can get away with it. This has the effect of giving fine girls a bad name. People think they’re ALL stuck up because of the ones that can’t be gracious about their God-given good looks, which are actually the luck of the draw and have nothing to do with their own actual worth, but instead is a function of their parent’s genes.
So… Guys go out to parties and meet stuck up attractive girls and get tired of getting shot down so they stop approaching fine chicks. They start sticking to the more humble, more personally attractive and still decent-looking girls. This is why you see more girls in this range married. The guys looking to get married are tired of the incessant demands of hot chicks, so when it’s time to get married, they choose someone more ‘Down To Earth’.
Reader Derek writes:
Bill,
I hear that many a pretty girl are without men because they are perceived to be unapproachable. Any truth in that statement?
This is why a lot of pretty girls are without men, as you mentioned. Because they’ve been given a bad rap, everybody wants to hook up with them but nobody wants to keep them. Even if they have the sweetest personality, the guys that would be good for them are tired of dealing with women that attractive, so they have to go without. The only guys willing to kick it to them are players who know what they’re doing and enjoy the challenge. The problem with that is that these guys come in loaded for bear, and the hot chicks end up getting used and dumped.
So… What does this mean for attractive women? Y’all need to showcase your personalities AS.MUCH.AS.POSSIBLE! :D Let the guys know that you’re willing to hear what they have to say, and they’ll let down that shield that they built up from being rejected so many times by the upper echelon of American females. The best bet for very attractive women is to be friendly… not to EVERYBODY, but to the guys that you’d like to talk to you because they’re scared to death that you’re going to be some crabby bitch and they’re looking right past YOU at your not-as-attractive homegirl, because they figure she’ll be more friendly and likely to be good relationship material.
As for the guys… You have to realize that attractive women get a lot of stuff, but they’re also getting played left and right. Sooner or later, they get tired of that and want a “good man” to spend time with that actually likes them for who they are and not just because of their fantastic looks. Pick yourselves up after the thousandth rejection and don’t get jaded towards attractive women. Give them a chance to give YOU a chance and see where it goes from there.
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12 Responses to “Pretty Girls – Too Unapproachable?”
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[...] writes: (in response to Pretty Girls – Too Unapproachable?) I don’t think you see a lot of that where I live in Los Angeles. There are a lot of [...]
You wrote:
“What happens here is that all the guys chase after the attractive girls and give them anything they want.”
LOL. You’re right of course. Until you get married, when the guy you finally chose thinks he can relax. Generally he’s right. So those girls, they need to maximize the opportunity while they can. It’s like be a kid at Christmas: you gotta enjoy it, because the days, they are limited.
Sonja
No Doubt, Sonja! hahaha “Get, While The Gettin’s GOOD!” :D
I always advocate AGAINST guys relaxing on what they do for their women just because they’ve finally bagged them, but it happens all the time. Both “sides” feel like they need to put on an act to get to the big show, but then after that, it’s like “Meh”.
That’s false advertising, people! Bait & Switch! Really poor form, IMO.
My standards are not unreasonable….
I just want a normal woman, without a half pound of makeup to make her look good, not better clothes than I have, not taller or fatter than I am, and definetly, not stupider…and less tattoos than I have…and I have 0…so tramp stamps are out of the question…
Oh my goodness. Men can be such losers sometimes. Get over it. Men don’t approach beautiful women because of YOUR insecurities. You PRE-JUDGE them and THINK their stuck up, mean or shallow. And can I ask “who are the idiots giving these girls everything they want?” I wonder if the answer is “MEN!”
Ha ha…. SO are you saying you brought this on yourselves?
Im not saying that there aren’t pretty girls who are stuck up, but trust me there are a lot of beautiful women who didn’t even KNOW they were pretty because people treated THEM mean. Girls talked about me for no reason, one girl her who was supposed to be my friend cut my hair, simply because she thought it was ‘prettier’ then hers. Guys trying to kiss girls in front of you like they don’t need you or act rude to you because they “assume” you’ll be stuck up acting towards them. So please don’t judge us, until you get to know us. Say hi, how is the weather, small talk, and if we act like a retard THEN you can come on here and write the crap you wrote.
Hey Cindy. :)
I think you’re right that men contribute GREATLY to this ‘problem’. Preferential treatment by men towards better-looking women leads to some of those women feeling that they DESERVE preferential treatment. Unfortunately, most of the time, these women fail to realize that they’re only getting credit because they’re physically attractive and lose their minds when they can’t get any attention once they ‘fall off’ and become has-beens. They wonder how they became not-special, when the answer is “You were fine then and you’re not now”.
Also agreed that some guys are scared to death to kick it to attractive women because they don’t see HOW she’s going to feel like she wants to date them. They don’t feel like home-run hitters, so they swing for the single, or at most, the ground-rule double. Guys need to stop projecting things onto women and approach each gal as if they’re a completely different person from the last highly-attractive chick you attempted to kick it to.
Men definitely brought this on themselves, because they were the ones with power. Women couldn’t even VOTE until a minute ago, so guys had a lot of time to set up this value hierarchy. Also, if men were more realistic about the reasons why they approached her in the first place, they’d realize that they didn’t CARE what her personality was at the time they saw her face & figure. Men trap themselves into dating JERKS because they only check for how she carries herself as a person AFTER they try to get her to lay down.
Also agreed that there are a lot of beautiful women that don’t consider themselves beautiful because of their life experiences and what they were told as they grew up. I know chicks who were fat as kids and are in really good shape now, except because they’re not AS SLIM as gals that were skinny their entire lives, they still feel fat as opposed to being in the best shape THEY can be in. Instead of feeling proud that they’re taking the best care of THEMSELVES, they’re still living off of past insults and self-perceptions. This is actually where you find the ‘bargains’ when it comes to women, because HAWT + HUMBLE = FTW!!! :D
The final point I agree with is that because people perceive attractive women as coldhearted, people treat them as if they don’t have any feelings. I try not to do this, but I realize from thinking about your comment “Guys.. act rude to you because they ‘assume’ you’ll be stuck up acting towards them” that I did this just the other day… naturally… without thinking about it for a split second.
I was at a party where everyone had introduced themselves to each other upon entry. I saw a couple of new chicks walk in the door, and JUST because of how they looked, I said to myself “Watch these clowns not introduce themselves to anyone”.. Not meaning just me, haha but they just looked like those type of chicks that like to act like they and the people they know are the only people in a location. It’s like how you have these bars where each group grabs a separate couch and only leaves it on the way TO and FROM the bathroom.
Anyway, the chicks did exactly what I thought, only speaking to their own friends that were there at the party, at which point I wrote them off as being guilty as charged instead of being “the better person” and introducing myself to them anyway. I was basically like “These chicks are worthless to me other than getting in the door at exclusive bars downtown, and I already *have* chicks for that”, so my lack of action towards them was in response to my (probably correct) impression of them, but I still should have introduced myself if I had wanted to say “I tried to be cordial, but they’re just jerks” (or the type of people that don’t go to parties to meet people and always love to have their little private gatherings).
Thanks for the comments! :D
That is so not true…pretty girls aren’t held up as the best of American society. There are a lot of “pretty” girls around, especially where I’m from, so no one really gets special treatment. Being pretty wont get you through life, you have to have a lot more than that.
I agree that being pretty won’t get you through life, Pegah. :)
Unfortunately, that ticket is sold to A LOT OF WOMEN in this country, and they don’t figure that out until way after it’s too late for them to stop relying on their looks to get them what they want, and then they’re stuck.
wow great article. I can totally relate to this and it sucks . but the right guy will eventually come along. your a genius when it comes up to social situations:)
Thank you, Michelle. :D
Glad you got something out of my article. :)
What you said is the bottom line. Y’all have to keep your eye out for when the right guy shows up and give him a chance to do the right thing instead of kickin’ him to the curb for some bogus reason, and then wondering why y’all keep meeting wack dudes. :D
Cheers!
Not true, not all pretty girls are stuck up, generalizing is bad:( but good point
Agreed, Akili. Looks don’t dictate personality. :)