Tips For The Ladies

I just became aware of a video blog that is geared towards dating tips for females. I thought I’d take this opportunity to give the ladies the only dating advice they need… and here it is……

Go outside.

That’s all. Go outside. Females are always going to be in demand, well… ATTRACTIVE females… because guys are always going to want to have sex with attractive girls/women. Regardless of the latest fads of metrosexuals and all this other weird stuff going on these days, a good-looking girl will NEVER go out of style.

Having said that… There are certain people you should NOT listen to when they hand out advice for women. One of these people is Oprah….

DO NOT LISTEN when Oprah says you are attractive no matter what you look like. Don’t listen. It’s not true. Nope. ๐Ÿ˜€ Go ahead and take your chances, but unless you have some kind of mental edge on the rest of the female population, you will be passed up for better-looking girls 98% of the time. It’s a fact. Live with it. ๐Ÿ™‚

If it were actually the truth that Oprah believed women were aiiite in whatever state of disrepair they allowed themselves to descend to, she wouldn’t keep dieting every so often. YA HEARD? ๐Ÿ˜€

If it’s REALLY all cool for y’all to look like “whatever’s clever”, then Oprah would weigh about 800 lbs by now and be on stage eating bon bons during the commercial breaks. It’s not the truth. Don’t go for the “okey-doke”. ๐Ÿ˜€ Stay in shape. Period.

DO NOT LISTEN when your hairdresser tells you you would look better with some form of crew-cut or weirdo hairstyle from out of a 1960s magazine about The Rolling Stones. Having the same haircut as Charlie Watts is NOT cute for a chick. Don’t do it. :/ Don’t go for the “okey-doke”.

If you want to know what looks good on a female, ask someone that likes females. Just because some magazine did an article on some artistic thing that someone did to some woman’s head, that doesn’t mean it’s going to look good on YOU, and it doesn’t mean that you’re going to get ANY RAPS until your hair grows back. ๐Ÿ™‚

DO NOT DATE *ANYONE* THAT CALLS YOU “WIFEY MATERIAL”. Don’t do it. Don’t go for the “okey-doke”. “Wifey Material” is an anomaly. It’s a term used by guys that are very familiar with NON-WIFEY MATERIAL. It means I would treat her differently than all the other chicks I run into. It does NOT mean that you’re special. It means you are perceived to be on a certain plateau. It’s YOU and the other chicks that are “wifey material”.

Material is a substance. They may as well call you “ice cream”. I like ice cream. I think ice cream is delicious. That doesn’t mean I’m going to devote myself to ONE BOX OF ICE CREAM. If I like Vanilla, for instance, that means that I’m going to like everything that qualifies to me as well-made Vanilla ice cream. I might treat that ice cream differently, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to eat Chocolate ice cream. Get it?

“Wifey Material” means you’re going to try YOUR DAMNEDEST not to get caught coming out of the next chick’s apartment. It means you’re going to hide your true nature from this chick in order to keep her around as long as possible. It’s almost better for you NOT to be “wifey material”, because you might get a more realistic representation of how the guy really is and what he thinks of you and his relationship to you.

So… To recap….. DO NOT let yourself get out of shape. DO NOT let hairstylists do weirdo things to your hair. DO NOT listen when the guy at the club @ 2am trying do do some ‘parking lot pimping’ tells you you’re the ONLY special girl he’s ever met in his try-to-get-laid-two-days-out-of-every-seven-’cause-he’s-broke-the-other-five-days dating career and that he’d like to “wife you up”.


Join the Conversation


  1. 98% of all women would rather have sex with Oprah than with you, Bill. It’s a fact. Live with it.

    1. Hey Shayna. Thanks for the comment. ๐Ÿ™‚

      So.. 98% of all women are lesbians? Fascinating. What research have you done that supports your theory? ๐Ÿ˜€

  2. ooh emm gee too funny! LMAO @ “weirdo things to your hair” I recently cut all my hair and all the female friends love it & the guy friends hate it, so Ive determined that I probably wont be dating till it grows back. No biggie cause I dont date often anyway.

    But I agree, maintaining the sexy is a must and not being gullible and believing everything that everyone tells you is key

    1. Hey Angela! ๐Ÿ˜€

      Well, this is the thing.. It has to be a combination of what *YOU* think is sexy and what the guys that you want to like you think is sexy.

      It’s no good to do something that pleases other people and makes you feel wack. My hair is naturally curly, for instance. Chicks sweat me more when it’s short than when it’s long. However, I personally like it better long than I like it short, so I keep it how I like it.

      But yeah, it’s totally retarded to take a guy’s word for how you should style your hair when he’s not even attracted to chicks in the first place. That’s like letting someone that doesn’t know about basketball decide who’s going to be recruited for a college team. \o/

    1. Thanks, Christine. ๐Ÿ™‚ This article was from back in ’07 when I was starting out and really pressing more on the humorous side of things. After a couple of years of this, I found it more useful to the community and more conducive to conversation to talk about REAL issues that someone might be able to do something about.

      But yeah. It’s just funny when they have all these tips for women when all y’all have to do is stay looking good and be nice and intelligent people. It’s *GUYS* that have to work so hard to get a rap! ๐Ÿ˜€

  3. Yes. All we have to do is G.O!
    Bill, I hear women remark daily on how their eyes are opened because of your site. I hear others who tell me, (it’s the first thing out of their mouths) that they are in a relationship. Smug about it. What they don’t examine and have NO IDEA about is why the guy is in a relationship with them.
    In many cases it is because of what you say it is NOT:
    We donโ€™t meet women and go โ€œNOW I get to live in a house because sheโ€™s richโ€. โ€œNOW, I get to travel placesโ€. โ€œNOW I get to save my own money because I can spend hersโ€.
    BAck to supply. I know a lot of women who have allowed themselves to be in the situation described above, including myself. But NO MORE and I’m not bitter or shut down. I get it. I GET IT!!!!!
    Thanks Bill!!!

    1. @Christine: We can’t disregard Opportunists & Gigolos.

      I wrote a post back in 2007 called “Marry Rich”. I know guys that specifically have hooked up with women they didn’t give a damn about and had no intention of being faithful to because she already had a house and a good job and he wasn’t going to have to do JACK and could still live the good life.

      That’s not what I’m talking about in this particular article. I’m talking about the basic, stereotypical flow of how & why relationships start. I know lots of guys that have dated crazy females because they liked how they looked and they liked having sex with them. I don’t know ANY guys that have deliberately dated women they’re not sexually attracted to, but I know that that happens.

      There’s no point in working if you can hook up with a female that’s already making enough money for the two of you. Working is a complete waste of time.

      However.. This goes back to the main theme, which is the utilitarian nature of selecting women for relationships. The point is that there’s something he’s adding to his life.. sex, companionship, money, travel, prestige, whatever.. by aligning himself with her.

      Would you rather work in McDonald’s and date a chick that works in McDonald’s or quit your minimum-wage job and date a CEO-chick who makes your daily wage in one hour? O_o

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.