Web: BillCammack.com
Business: Bill C. Quality Control
Facebook: Bill Cammack
Twitter: @BillCammack
eMail: BillCammack
Phone: +1.347.767.5922
The Psychology of Men
So my blog, DatingGenius gets syndicated in a few places… mostly Lux & Blakeley’s Boinkology.
The other day, my blog was linked to by Alexis McKinnis, over @ vita.mn in a post called “Quick Links: Dude Edition”.
So today, I’m having a conversation with a friend where I’m discussing syndication, and I link to Alexis’ blog as an example and lo and behold, there are comments that had been made since the time I became aware of and read the post. One of those comments was from a reader of hers who calls himself “AlphaBean”, and here’s what he had to say, which pertained to my post, “Ladies: Why He Won’t Call You His Girlfriend”:
3) I don’t like that list. It sounds like it’s trying to be scientific, without actually delving into the psychology of men. People like manboys (AlphaBean) who can’t even say “I Love You” in private without feeling like a tool. That would be getting way too serious, wouldn’t it? But come on… if you’re not going to be serious, then at least be funny. Rachel Ray jacking off corn? A H2 Hummer stuck in a mud puddle? Hilarious. That list? Not so much.
Now… Putting aside the fact that this person clearly read my post and decided NOT to leave that comment on MY blog, but back on Alexis’… What jumped out at me was “The Psychology of Men”. I think that’s a FANTASTIC title, and it probably should have been the first post of this kind that I ever wrote. So now… Let’s talk about “The Psychology of Men”.
Ladies… Here is the male thought process……
That’s it.
Give your man what he wants, and you will remain. Deviate from the Prime Directive, and you will be replaced.
It’s that simple. There’s nothing else you need to know about guys. You can apply this Golden Rule in all situations:
He wants to have sex and you don’t… you will be replaced.
He wants to go to the club and you don’t… you will be replaced.
He wants breakfast and you don’t want to cook it… you will be replaced.
You don’t want to get out from in front of the television… you will be replaced.
He doesn’t want kids and you’re like “I’m having it anyway! :D “… you will be replaced.
You eat bon bons all day instead of going to the gym… you will be replaced.
etc etc etc ad infinitum. You are neither Spock nor McCoy nor Uhura. You do not resemble Nichelle Nichols:
You are a Redshirt. There is no guarantee that you will reprise your role in the next episode. If there are hostile forces on the planet y’all beam down to, *YOU* will be the first to go. Beleedat. :D
A redshirt is a stock character, used frequently in science fiction but also in other genres,[citation needed] whose primary purpose is to die soon after being introduced, thus demonstrating the dangerous circumstances faced by the main characters. The term originates from the science fiction television series Star Trek, in which security officers wear red shirts and are often killed on field missions under the aforementioned circumstances.[1]
Now that we’ve… delved into the psychology of men….. Let’s discuss why “AlphaBean” refers to himself as a “manboy” and “can’t even say ‘I Love You’ in private without feeling like a tool”.
By both of his statements, “AlphaBean” informs us that he’s been BRAINWASHED. I can only imagine what a “manboy” is supposed to be. It sounds like a character from “Land of the Lost”.
However, I’ll assume it’s a reference to someone whose age indicates that they’re a man, but whose behavior & mannerisms indicate that they’re a boy. *YAWN*. If that’s the case, WAKE UP, “ALPHABEAN”. There’s no blueprint to human development. You feel how you feel and that’s it. There’s no agreed-upon AGE where someone starts to feel differently than they felt before. Just because you’re 72 doesn’t mean you can’t pull 54-year-old chicks. Free your mind. Stop blaming yourself for not keeping up with the Joneses. Do You.
As far as “feeling like a tool” (whatever a “tool” is), for saying “I love you” in private… Why don’t you examine what that phrase means to you?….. Where did you learn it? What did it mean to you as a child? What did it mean to you when your parents said that to you? DID your parents say that to you? Is “I love you” merely a tool you use to get laid? Is “I love you” a term that you emotionally reserve to ONLY say to “The One”? If that’s the case, then you won’t feel comfortable saying “I love you” to a chick that you know damned well is NOT “The One”. Capisce?
On top of that, according to your profile, you live in the United States of America, which means that you will most likely be labeled a PUSSY for telling a chick you love her, even if you do, with your entire heart and soul. If it’s not that you’ll be less of a man, you might be worried that your relationship to her will change instantaneously by saying three bullshit words that anyone can say to anyone with no fear of getting struck by lightning. You’ll also be penalized by society for telling more than one chick that you love her, which is known as polyamory. You’ll also be penalized for telling a chick you love her if she’s already in a so-called relationship to someone else. The job of your Superego is to carry society’s brainwashing along with you to beat you over the head whenever you’re ready to do whatever comes naturally to you.
So, yeah… Being that I minored in Psych @ MIT (alum.mit.edu/www/billcammack), I can go on and on about “The Psychology of Men” all day and all night. That wasn’t my point, in “Ladies: Why He Won’t Call You His Girlfriend”, but I’m glad you brought it up! :D
Cheers! :D
Related Posts
16 Responses to “The Psychology of Men”
Leave a Reply
Word to the wise AlphaBean — you wanna step to Bill C, you Open Hailing Frequencies and you can engage in some conversation. He can dial the serious up or down a notch, but you don’t come here for the pinnacle of intellectual discussion. Bill C tells it like it is, from his perspective, he’s not out here to discover objective truth. You see the truth there, it’s yours to grow on.
However, if you come in with torpedoes locked on ready to flame, you’ll find yourself on the wrong side of of phasers set to “cap.”
By the way, Bill – You gotta account for the fact that some girls can get up to the point of recurring charachter Lieutenant or even 2nd in command, and it takes more serious insubordination or circumstantial rewrites to get her cut, but that ain’t shit what happens over night.
lol Thanks, Dave hahaha :D
Long-time reader, Derek, suggested at one point that I post a disclaimer that the stuff I post is comedy or whatever. I’m happier with people getting what they get out of it, whether it’s the serious or the funny or the “I didn’t get it” or the WTF?
hahaha And yeah, I know there are loopholes and concessions that keep women in the game even if they’re not operating on all cylinders, :) but we have to start from the start.
I don’t know ANY guys that chose their women because they specifically knew they were defective. It’s always “I like her a lot and think I could make a go of this with her”.
@David: Also, reading my post again this morning and considering your point in the #2 comment above…
By “replaced”, I didn’t mean to imply always PERMANENTLY replaced… Like, not definitely EJECTED from the relationship.
What I was also thinking of, but didn’t expand on enough is that women are often TEMPORARILY replaced. This is referred to as “cheating”. The guy goes “outside of his relationship” to get what he wants and then returns to his relationship for the percentage that his “main squeeze” is interested in providing.
I guess the bottom line for the ladies is “Hannle Yo Bidnezz with your man, or Monica will do it for you”. :D
Bill, I also subscribe to the idea of “Give. Me. What. I. Want.” and as long as brothers know what is good for the goose is good for the gander, then we’re all cool.
Nice blog, dude. I found it through Alexis’s link at Vita.mn, and I have to say it’s really funny but at the same time sort of insightful. All those normal advice columns are so sugar coated and pansy-ass. No one is straight forward or honest anymore “cuz it might hurt someone’s feelings” BLEHHHH! Good work with the honesty, it’s funny as hell.
@Carrie: Thanks for the props! Cheers! :D
I try to keep it edgy/educational, but not textbook-educational, hahaha.
I’m another one who’s bored to death of these so-called dating and relationship blogs that never get down to the nitty-gritty of what REALLY happens between people that can make or break a relationship. Fortunately for me, all my girlfriends know where I’m coming from, so it’s all love and laughs in my circle! :D um… Except when Annie‘s throwing me under the bus, as usual. :/
@Shannon Renee: No doubt! It definitely works both ways. There are TONS of dudes that are Redshirts and don’t even know it! :D
I haven’t forgotten about your “Stable of Bros” post, hahaha :D
3) I don’t like that list. It sounds like it’s trying to be scientific, without actually delving into the psychology of men
Delving? Do people really want to do that?
I see were you mentioned your minor in Psych, I wil say that I majored in Journalism (but I cant type) and minored in English (but seriously i cant spell) having said that, delve into my mind and you will hit the mountain side quick enough. Education aside, im a pretty simple dude and G.M.W.I.W pretty much sums it up. I want sex, yes I do. I want those hot wings, yes i do. I want That Modelo Negro beer, yes i do.
I really want to be able to get sum while im eating my wings and wearing that helmet with the straw that extends from the beer holder on the sides.
oh yeah, my thought process is pretty simple BUT so is his and his and his and his…
lol
and Im ok with being a red shirt, cause im actually built for this. Just dont go changing my shirt color when YOU cop feelings!
Yeah. It’s pretty interesting how differently men and women approach the entire dating/relationships thing as a whole and how the same battles keep being fought over and over with ZERO resolution.
The Psychology of Women, ie… Why You not Built For this!!!
Ok, regardless of whether you think I am being foolish, stupid, or just out right disgusting….
Just follow me on this one point I want to make.
From a disclaimers stand point I am neither a scientist nor an educated expert on what makes you YOU.
The one thing I do know is that the act of sexual intercourse itself is the definitive explanation as to why, regardless of how aggressive a female you are, you will always be submissive to me and any other man out there. Here it is, You are an In-ee and I am an Outie. Was that simple enough?? No? Oh ok…
Have you ever seen two animals in the wild ready to square off and at the last minute one of them rolls over and exposes his underside/belly to the other? That’s how nature has separated the strongest from the weak, the Alpha from the beta, the male from the female. From the meekest woman out there to the most aggressive, all women have to at some point submit to the male in order to procreate or at least practice procreation. Its humorous to me when I hear a female talking about how she is in charge and she treats them dudes like they are the b*tches in the relationship. Really?? If the guy did not want to sleep with you there is pretty much nothing you could do and that includes standing in front of him completely naked. You cant force him to penetrate if he chooses to not be interested where as he can always invade your personal space when and if he wants. Its nature. That’s why I always say that when it comes to the dating game and the games involved, as a woman, You Are Not Built For This.
I don’t care if you are a female with dudish tendencies, this game is not for you. The whole process of the sexual act is the reason that, regardless of talk, many (if not MOST) woman at some point will “cop feelings†in a situation that was simply an agreement to be friends with benefits. It takes a level of trust to allow me to keep coming over and exposing your soft under/inner side with out developing some kind of emotional feelings. I have to be inside of you regardless of how in control you think you are. Dont believe me? Well lets see… You want to tease me and get me worked up with some oral foreplay, you have to let me in. You tell your female friends that you “gonna get†with me/him and make me want more, you going to show me what a real woman is like…still have to let me in. Oh, so now because I’m full of myself you only going to touch me?? Well, you still have to form an enclosure with your hand and guess what…You still have to invite me in. Not only do you have to accept that Im coming in (no pun intended there) you have to convince and prepare your body for said invasion. You have to make sure that your body has triggered its own mechanisms that start with a swelling of the orifice, the natural lubrication of the passage way and ends with a loosening of the muscles to ensure pleasant entry. Its this feeling of fulfillment and pleasure that (and I fully believe this) takes an emotional toll on the female as her hormones are put to the test of this euphoric experience. Its the invasion and subsequent submission that renders the female susceptible to the emotional attachment that many swear was not going to happen. How many of us know females that are caught up with guys who don’t sexually satisfy them but continue to stay the course????
With guys if the sex was whack, we set sail for some other uncharted waters.
Invade that’s what we do.
Allow that’s what you do.
So by nature, as a female, You Are Not Built For This!
Excellent points, Frank. Women would LOVE for the game to be even and fair, but it just isn’t. Women catch feelin’s too easily, and one of the reasons is that sex is invasive to them. Merely due to the physical setup, sex has to be more personal for females because they’re making themselves ‘vulnerable’, or as you put it, they’re saying to themselves “I want to let this guy inside me”, which is a decision they’re only going to make if they feel a certain way about the guy they’re thinking about.
Strangely enough, the sex thing parallels the bathroom thing. If a chick can’t find a bathroom, she’s SOL. If a guy can’t find a bathroom (assuming it’s um… #1! HAHAHA) any wall or tree or secluded area will do. No muss, No fuss. done deal. The same way the vast majority of women aren’t willing to drop their drawers and “go #1″ on the sidewalk, the vast majority of women aren’t cut out for the “love em, leave em” game.
I will you you men like the condoms that you are. You are the ones who get attached and try to play all these games and then you always wind up eating out of the palm of my hand. So ha ha in your face gangsta style. I’m laughing at you and all the guys who try and play it so cool.
I had this one gut try to play me and then I put the bait out there and he bit. Then emotionally, I made him feel like the turd that he is for trying to play games. More and more women will be like this and you male pigs can’t stop us. Ha ha ha bitches!
It’s absolutely true that women that guys perceive to be good-looking or easy to have sex with will have a pretty easy time making guys do whatever they want.
You may also be right that more women will become users because y’all are being educated now and have your own property, jobs and money. Technically, it’s getting to the point where women need men in the same way that men need women, as a supplement to their actual lives.
If you watch The Maury Show, you’ll see lots of females that swear up and down that the dude on the stage is the father of her child and she didn’t **** anybody else during that time, and then when the test results come back, he is *NOT* the father and he gets up and does his Touchdown dance.
It’s obvious that women can and will lie as much as men do to get what they want, so the shift you’re talking about is definitely possible.
All things being equeal (meaning no clothes ever EVER come off) I do believe that in the business world if a female can prove to be as ruthless as her male colleges, she should be afforded the chance to earn and advance as a “HE” would. Having said though, I have encountered many a woman who after initially putting her “Alpha” tendencies out front wound up pulling back when confronted by a male of lesser ability. Genetics? Upbringing?? Who knows. Sexually speaking though a female has to assume the conquered position and that in turn (I think) establishes the limits they themselves deal with. I could be wrong and proably am but its hard to argue with how we are built. Ww are Hunters, they are Nurturers. We see a cow and think of 100 different BBQ recipes, they see an animal that can be domesticated. We see a fine lil chick walk by and think “how wonderful a genetic specimen she would be for my future offspring” and she is thinking “what a nice set of shoulders for me to be leaning on during those cold and dark night!!” lol
Sex is invasive… that’s pretty insightful and also touches on the whole female sense of control in a relationship… hmmmm.
I was recently on a site (sorry can’t find the link) where a woman went to great lengths to explain the rudiments of attraction from both sides of the fence (pretty=healthy place to plant my flag, and whatever the female side of the equation is) and concluded with, we (I think she just meant men) need to overcome our genetics to make things more fair. Um, no. We (meaning women) need to except the way things are and stop throwing up all this wishful thinking churn. It’s also an indirect form of man bashing. These rules inside all of us were written way before there were even societies yet there’s an expectation that I (a man) should be able to flip a switch, turn into a Vulcan and override that 100%… because it would make her life easier. I’ll do it as soon as women stop looking for Prince Charming or some patriarchal protector or whatever. Get real. I’m a dude and I like it. I’m a collection of desires on two feet and I was built to procreate. We all are. Everything else any of us does from birth to life is just a hobby.
What you’re talking about is what blinds a lot of women to the facts of what’s going on in their relationships. There are certain things they don’t want to believe, merely because this is 2009 and not 1909.
Their not believing something doesn’t make it disappear. If we’re supposed to be all civilized now that we’re in the future, how come strip joints and other erotica establishments are still making money like crazy? How come they’re not running out of customers? Because nothing’s changed is why. As much as women WISH it would change, it’s not going to, because men don’t want anything other than what men want.
It’s easiest to take advantage of people when they’re not paying attention OR when they’re actively suppressing information that’s obvious to them instead of mounting a proper defense. Then, women turn around and wonder what happened when the dudes were giving them signs the entire time.
As far as sexual “equality”, that’s not going to happen either, because guys actually have to be aroused in order to have sex. Women don’t. If she’s not hawt (by his estimation) or can’t get him interested in some other way, she’s SHORT. It’s a wrap.
Fortunately, there are lots of chicks that talk all that androgynous yang in public, but behind closed doors, they’re most DEFINITELY down for the cause! ;)