A Woman’s Place…

hahahaha No, No, No, “A Woman’s Place” is NOT in the kitchen, and certainly GOD FORBID, PREGNANT! πŸ˜€

“A Woman’s Place” is wherever she wants it to be. πŸ™‚ ….. Unfortunately, women need to be REALISTIC about the responsibilities they’re taking on if they choose to be the leader of the pack, or at least the relationship. In this age of shows like “Oprah” and (I hate to even mention) “Dr. Phil”, women’s heads are getting gassed up to the point that they actually believe their own hype and set themselves up for a sobering confrontation with reality.

I’m thinking about this because the other day, I was out with some friends, and I was trying to explain something, which ended up with me giving several examples of situations where it was extremely important that the woman listen to her man. My friend’s response was “ok… So you’re saying a woman needs to know her place”. I realized that I wasn’t explaining my position to her properly, so I started over and explained it in more general terms.

In any situation, whether it’s relationships or business, the STRONGEST person needs to be the leader. Period. Not necessarily PHYSICALLY stronger… Mentally stronger. Stronger in that particular field. Better rolodex. More influence. Faster at the same process. More gregarious. Whatever it is, it’s RETARDED to have “stronger” people following the lead of “weaker” people, in any case.

If you have a star quarterback, you don’t bench him for the third-string QB. You COULD… if you really wanted to, but since your goal is to WIN THE GAME, you want the best players front and center.

This is the point I was really trying to make… Not that the female should always follow the male, but that the “weaker” should always follow the “stronger” or the inferior should follow the superior. Privates don’t tell Generals what to do in the Army.

So the real question is, which one of you is “stronger” in the relationship? What about particular aspects of the relationship? If the guy makes more money and the gal is better at saving and investing it… everybody play your position and things will work out for the best. OTOH, if you INSIST on saying what happens with the money, because YOU brought it into the house, you’re an IDIOT if you know she can do it better than you.

Of course, all these things depend on being able to see reality and not falling prey to the illusions that you’re building your self-esteem on. If you believe that because you’re the guy, you’re automatically smarter and stronger and better, you might not be able to appreciate that your girl trumps you in certain areas, and you won’t have the most efficient relationship, because you’ll stifle her creativity when she comes up with ideas that you think are stupid, just becase YOU can’t comprehend what she’s saying. For women, I find in a lot of cases, they believe they can PHYSICALLY do things just because they can see themselves doing it in their mind’s eye. That’s REALLY, REALLY DANGEROUS for them, especially when coupled with the illusion that a man’s never going to hit a woman, so she can run off at the mouth and break bad all she wants without consequences and repercussions.

This is what led to a woman getting shot to death for saying “What are you going to do? Shoot us?” to some criminal that had already hit her boyfriend in the head with a gun.

I’ve seen this mentality lots of times, personally. I was talking to a female friend of mine who was dating this guy I knew. She was telling me about some aspect of their relationship she didn’t like, and then started telling me how she’d punch him in his face or smack him or beat him up or whatever ABSOLUTE NONSENSE she was spewing. Now, I know that when he was around her, he liked to play that “Romeo” role and be all nice and sweet, hahaha but I ALSO happened to know that he had had fights against SEVERAL. MEN. SIMULTANEOUSLY. Now, that’s not something that you mention to a chick you’re trying to have sex with (unless she’s into that Braveheart / Gladiator stuff), so she was probably oblivious to the fact that laying hands on him would have been EXTREMELY DANGEROUS for her and the only reason she wouldn’t get her ass KICKED is if HE *CHOSE* not to kick it.

These delusions are easily handled within a relationship, because if you know damned well she’s just running her mouth and isn’t actually going to hit you, it’s no big deal… you just ignore her, like usual. However, you can’t afford for her to start breaking bad to other dudes, thereby initiating unnecessary beefs that SHE isn’t going to be called upon to handle.

This is what brings us back to “A Woman’s Place”…

“A Woman’s Place” is wherever she wants it to be. If she’s the type of person to start problems, let her be the type of person to HANDLE those same problems. How many times have you seen women cause fights between men? Uh-Huh. Nope! πŸ˜€ Next time she jumps up in some dude’s face, let her throw the hands with him. You sit back with the popcorn and make sure nobody else jumps in if she gets the upper hand and starts mopping the floor with him.

Yes. I know. This is ENTIRELY unrealistic, because you will be immediately DUMPED right after the fight, hahaha. This is why guys go for this bullshit, because they’d rather be beaten up and get blown later than NOT get beaten up and NOT have a girl at the end of the day. :/

This is why the solution is not to TELL women what their place is, but to make sure you’re dating women who have a REALISTIC UNDERSTANDING of what their place is… and yours too…

Because if your girl can kick your ass, then you MIGHT wanna consider brushing up on your cooking lessons so you can make sure you have that DINNER on the table when she gets home from work! πŸ˜€

DatingGenius
 

7 thoughts on “A Woman’s Place…”

  1. I really don’t see why you need to connect your nonsense advice to the real case of that woman’s murder. Especially considered your tenuous grasp on the facts from the bits and pieces reported in the news. You have no idea what her motivation was, or what was going through her mind at that moment, and you should not pretend to, especially just to try to connect it to some point you are making for your silly advice blog. Maybe you would better off sticking to talking about women you actually know.

  2. Hey David. Thanks for the comment. πŸ™‚

    First of all, nobody except the people there know what happened. Her. Her boyfriend. Whomever else was in their party. The criminals. Not YOU and not ME. That means that all we have to go on is the story that was in ALL of the papers. Perhaps you’d get more out of the account in The New York Times.

    If the story that was in ALL the papers was incorrect, the people who were there and are still alive would have said so, and there would be different information. On top of that, there were police reports written

    So, in that case, since the papers didn’t report that she had a gun on her, don’t you think she should have shut up after her boyfriend got hit with the gun?

    Or, is that not your point?

    The reason I connect what I have to say to REALITY is that otherwise, you’d be anonymously posting on my blog that what I’m talking about never happens in real life. πŸ˜€

    You’d be saying “There’s no reason for women to ever be concerned that what they say is going to get them hurt” and, by extension, “There’s no reason for a GUY to be concerned that what his WOMAN says is going to get HIM hurt”.

    So, I’m sorry that your feelings got hurt, David. Would you have felt better if I had referenced this article from 2005, where nobody got killed but a couple of guys suffered broken jaws after one of their women threw a hot dog at a guy that had been bothering them?

    The song remains the same. Throw hot dogs at people when you’re willing to accept the consequences of your actions.

    I don’t know what the hot dog thrower’s “motivation” was either. I don’t know what went through her mind either. I know what the reports said she did, and I know what the reports said the consequences of her actions were.

    Cause and Effect. Stimulus and Response. Consequences and Repercussions……

    Welcome to the real world, Neo.

  3. I think your point (and your need to keep linking your general, boilerplate advice) to these very visible cases from the last few years is clear:

    To increase your Google rankings.

    All the best, and watch your karma,

    David

  4. “For women, I find in a lot of cases, they believe they can PHYSICALLY do things just because they can see themselves doing it in their mindÒ€ℒs eye.”

    Interesting point. I was just like that in my early twenties. I am nearly six feet tall, and when a glass of jam or honey needs to be opened, people around me usually turn to me for help. The height and relative physical strength used to give me a lot of self-confidence. I believed that I was not the “typical victim” and would have a fair chance if I ever got in trouble with a man. Especially because in play-fights with male friends, I always had the impression that I nearly could have won. Until one day, one of these male friends eventually told me that he had always been holding back, because otherwise he would have won too easily and that would have taken all the fun out of the game. That was quite a shock. That night I went home to my boy-friend and asked him to arm wrestle me and not hold back, because I wanted to know what that would be like. This little experiment made me realize that – despite all the talk about men and women being equal – there are some differences between the sexes that can not be denied.

    So how should women deal with the fact that they can not win a fight with a man, at least not if he is of similar height and weight? There is only one logical solution: Don’t let a fight happen. There are two methods to achieve this when you are – for whatever reason – alone with a guy who has evil on his mind:

    A) Run.

    B) If running away is not possible, use the element of surprise and hit the guy so hard that he does not get up again so there will be no fight. That means no warnings, no discussions, no undignified begging for mercy. It means forgetting about fairness or the “adequacy of resources”. If the guy does not pay attention for a second and the woman is lucky enough not to be paralyzed with fear, TO HELL WITH ADEQUACY. If a woman never had any training in close combat, how is she supposed to know how much strength she needs to apply in order to knock someone unconscious but leave him alive? Sorry guys, she wouldn’t know.

    Bill, I can understand that it impresses you if a guy had fights against SEVERAL. MEN. SIMUlTANEOUSLY. But why should it impress this female friend of yours? I realized relatively late in life that being a woman means being inferior to almost any man in terms of physical strength, no matter whether he is a good fighter or not. But I guess women of average height or petite women know that from the start. So it is very likely that your friend knows it too. If she understands that her boy-friend is strong enough to kill her if he chose to, what difference does it make if he has the strength and skill to kill her five times in a row? She can only die once. But if she wants to spend time alone with him at his place, she has to trust him not to be the kind of guy who would use his strength against her. That kind of trust is the prerequisite for any intimate relationship to a man, and it is probably the reason why she punched his face and expected to get away with it. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean to justify bitchy behaviour. All I am saying is that her actions are not as illogical as you seem to think.

  5. Thanks for the excellent and well-expressed comment, “fishingrod”. πŸ™‚

    Before I get to the answers, I’d like to say that this post isn’t geared towards women because they’re smaller or less able to defend themselves physically. That’s not what I’m saying. I’m talking about how American society, and probably many others (which I can’t speak to, because I live in the US of A πŸ˜€ ) lulls women to sleep by making them believe that they’re protected by the chivalrous concept that a man “should” never hit a woman.

    THAT’S my point. WAKE UP! Stop Sleeping, Ladies!

    Men, Boys, Guys, what-have-you do not benefit from this same luxury. There is no “you should never hit a guy”. Because of this, if you’re a guy, sooner or later, somebody’s going to test you. You’re going to say or do something and somebody’s going to punch you in your face. That’s when guys get that “wake up” moment like you got when your boyfriend didn’t hold back when he arm-wrestled you. Guys get this ALL. THE. TIME, and because of this, we get to decide when we want to run our mouths and when we want to S.T.F.U! πŸ˜€

    So, my actual point is that the fact that women are brainwashed that guys will never hit them, slap them, shake the shit out of them, shoot them, throw them down the stairs, whatever… makes women EXTREMELY VULNERABLE in the presence of guys OR girls that don’t play by those rules.

    As far as your question “So how should women deal with the fact that they can not win a fight with a man, at least not if he is of similar height and weight?”, it’s the same advice that I would have for a guy who’s smaller than another guy or group of guys that wants to attack him… Know Your Surroundings as much as possible. Do NOT rely on your own uneducated opinion that you’re going to effectively Get Busy if someone tries to take advantage of you. Know where the cops are in your area, or at least people that are interested in your well-being and will most likely come to your aid if something goes down.

    Unfortunately, a lot of times, women are depending on guys that they THINK are looking out for them, and those guys are really just waiting for their chance to catch her slippin’ and do whatever he wants to her. So, I agree with you when you say “don’t let a fight happen”, but in case one does, I also agree with your solutions:

    a) Run – Which goes back to knowing what your surroundings are and what your escape routes are and the closest people who might help you out are.

    b) Cheat – hahaha DEFINITELY women (or whomever’s about to be taken advantage of) should CHEAT if they’re in a bad situation. Whomever’s pressuring them shouldn’t have been doing it in the first place, so they get what they deserve if she catches them instead of them catching her.

    lolol, Now… As far as my statement about my friend fighting “several men simultaneously”, hahaha I wasn’t saying that to express that I was impressed with that. πŸ˜€ I’m actually NOT impressed with that. You fight as many guys as you have to fight, and that’s that. If several COWARDLY guys decided they wanted to beat him up and he fought all of them, good for him, but, no, I’m not “impressed”. πŸ˜€ That’s what he’s SUPPOSED to do, *NSFW* like taking care of your own kids! *NSFW* πŸ˜€

    My point in bringing that situation up was, and I guess I didn’t set the situation up sufficiently… Similar to guys arm-wrestling you and not going all-out… Arm-wrestling you is SOCIALIZING with a female. It’s not an actual competition. Guys like holding hands with girls and wrestling them and all other sorts of things, so they’re getting their kicks from SOCIALIZING with you, not defeating you in a sporting contest.

    So, similarly, I *KNOW* damned well that my friend did NOT tell his girlfriend that I was talking to that he was a seasoned street-fighter. That’s not going to go over big with the average female. I’m sure he was playing that lovey-dovey role and being all sweet to her so he could get in her pants. ALSO, I’m sure that every time she “threatened” him (in quotes, because she’s no threat, so her words are devoid of meaning) with slapping him or whatever, he shied away from the situation, leading her to believe that if she DID hit him, he wouldn’t do JACK about it. So she’s standing there telling me that she’d lay hands on a guy that I.KNOW. could beat up EIGHT of her if he wanted to… Not because she was female, and not because she was way smaller than him, but because I knew her level of physical ability and I knew *his*, and like I said, the only thing that would have saved her if she had laid hands on him would have been HIS own sense of CHIVALRY.

    Should that impress HER? Nope. πŸ˜€ It should SCARE her. That’s precisely why guys aren’t going to say this to girls unless those girls are interested in dating guys that could kick their asses if they felt like it.

    I think the next part of your argument is EXACTLY what I’m talking about. She SHOULD know he can beat her up, but she doesn’t ACT.LIKE.SHE.KNOWS. Does that make sense? That’s my entire point. Why is she claiming to do something if she KNOWS she can’t do it? It’s because she doesn’t BELIEVE he’s going to hit her. She may very well be right. She may have correctly assessed his sense of chivalry, and he wouldn’t touch her at all. The problem is that while there are very many, VERY MANY guys that subscribe to this, there’s a percentage that DO NOT, and that’s what women have to be aware of and look out for.

    As far as “spending time with him alone at his place”, you’re right. She needs to feel a sense of TRUST in order to be comfortable being along with him. What I’m saying is that TRUST needs to be handed out on an individual basis, NOT Global. Trust that ONE guy… Don’t believe that all guys are trustworthy, because the ones you’ve come into contact with have all behaved within the rules of society.

    Small correction. My friend NEVER laid hands on the guy. πŸ™‚ She was FRONTING like she was going to, but I knew damned well she was just running her mouth. If I had thought she was ACTUALLY going to hit him, I would have told her not to hit him, and I would have told her WHY she shouldn’t have hit him. Both of them were my friends, so I wasn’t going to let her potentially get herself hurt. Screw his rap! hahaha If I had thought she was going to start a physical confrontation with him, I would have told her who he really is.

    Now, in the case of the hot-dog thrower, she was COMPLETELY DISCOURTEOUS and didn’t take her man’s health and welfare into account before she decided to “break bad” with some dude that had already, DEFINITELY overstepped his bounds with that group. The offender shouldn’t have done what he did to the ladies, however, once that happened, that should have been a cue for the guys to BREAK.NORTH! (read: LEAVE THE PREMISES, PRONTO!). The guys didn’t take their girls and leave, so what happened was one of their girls took matters into her own hands by throwing a hot dog at some guy, who proceeded to take it out on the men that were WITH the women.

    So I suppose my point there was that a) don’t throw hot dogs at people whose asses you can’t kick, and b) if you’re gonna do that, do it on YOUR OWN TIME, not when your man’s there to receive a critical beatdown on your behalf! πŸ˜€

    Thanks again for the comment. πŸ™‚

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