The problem here is that it’s a vicious cycle. Guys want to get laid. Period. They propose this straight-up to gals and get shot down for myriad reasons. They learn to LIE TO HER to get her to lay down. Done deal.

Guys get good at getting gals to do what they want, so someone develops an anti-system to combat this. Their HOPE is that if you stall a guy for three dates, he’ll bail because you’re not putting out. The REALITY is that he’s kicking the same game to like TEN OTHER CHICKS and he couldn’t care less when you come around and give him some. He’s getting laid REGARDLESS of what *you* do.

If you decide to give this guy some… fine… he’ll take it. :) It’s no big deal though. Whenever she decides to stop frontin’, she could ‘get it’… Assuming she didn’t wait so long that she’s a has-been now and nobody wants that.

This is why The Rules only works in a vacuum. It works fine for women who are the ONLY sought-after gal in the area, because guys are going to keep coming after her no matter how ridiculously she acts. The rest of the women are going to end up dating Herbs or dating a pint of Haagen-Dazs this weekend.

My favorite part of this post: “A guy might want to blank you bent over the blank with your leg up on the blank until you blank all over him and he’s not going to say AAAAAAAAAAAAAAANYTHING about it that’s gonna mess with his cash flow.”

Sonja — I’m not going to mince words here. Reading your comments are an embarassment to independent, strong women.

“The natural woman is such a soft-hearted creature, she can have the wool pulled over her eyes. She needs rules to keep her out of trouble. Historically, these were laid down by society. Now, women are being hurt by a lack of rules and a book has to be brought out to train them in some more-prudent attitutudes.” There are so many things wrong with that statement! You are basically regurgitating centuries of stereotypes and bullsh*t. If you feel like you are soft-hearted, great. If you like referring to yourself as a freaking “creature”, great. Speak for yourself, honey, because the women I know are a bit more savvy than you make us out to be.

“BTW these days being at home with small children is a prestige position. And the hunt for the guys who can afford to let you be there is on.” Whoaaaaaaaaa. I mean, I know some women like to be housewives, but how is that a prestige position? You sound like a gold-digger, no offense. I’m not looking for a rich guy, so I guess I just made the “hunt” easier for ya.

I don’t mean to completely call you out and dissect what you said line by line, so I’ll just end by saying…you’re entitled to your opinion but I’m really glad there are guys out there who agree that the “Rules” are pretty much BS. I don’t want to play games and I hope to end up with a guy who doesn’t play games either. Maybe some women are delicate little creatures, but I’d like to think we can move outside the gender roles society assigns us and just be ourselves.

The short version of my reply is that you have it absolutely right. It’s better to lose raps from the giddyap because people don’t like your natural way of being than to play it off like as if you’re someone different and then have to attempt to maintain that facade throughout the relationship.

If you like “talking dirty” to someone, don’t act all prim & proper, because when you can’t resist and you blurt something out, they’re gonna be like “Who. Is. This. FREAK?” hahaha. You would have been better off telling it like it is from the get.

Also, as you mentioned, playing games wastes A. LOT. OF. TIME. that could have been better spent actually assessing the other person’s personality and demonstrating your own.

There’s NOTHING better than honest and real MUTUAL ATTRACTION. People have opportunities to find this and then blow it… because they weren’t comfortable enough with themselves to really let the other person know how and what they were feeling for them.