haha You’re absolutely right. :) I wasn’t trying to make a comprehensive list, but paying attention to a woman’s vital in making her feel special. I’m going to have to make a post about that and include your comments as a jumping-off point :D

As far as the dude that fumbled, haha Too Bad, So Sad that he didn’t get to get on! :D hahaha

You’re also right about monologues. I’ve seen it lots of times. Guys think they have to get in as much information as possible about what they own or what they do or CAN do for a chick so they can get laid, so they just keep talking and talking without noticing whether they’re getting closer to getting some or farther away.

It’s not their fault, really. It’s all they know. Being that they don’t know anything about women, they try what they read in magazines, having nothing better to do. The thing they don’t realize is that the guy with the Porsche could have gotten laid WITHOUT mentioning his Porsche, because he never checked if the chick just liked him off the bat. There are lots of guys with fancy cars that STILL don’t get on because their presentation’s horrid. There are lots of guys with MetroCards (passes to get on the New York City subways) and no car at all that will steal your girl in the blink of an eye and replace her before you even noticed she was missing.

Except for “looking good” and maybe the “being intelligent and witty” part, all those things you listed can actually be LEARNED by almost anyone. And you forgot the most important thing: Attention. Showing (or at least, pretending) that you are interested in the other person. Active listening. Focus. So easy to learn that I really don’t understand why not more guys give it a try.

Instead, so many guys hold monologues, trying to impress us. A long time ago, someone tried to convince me that he was a great lover and I should not miss the chance to have sex with him. While he was going on and on about his preferences and qualities, I listened, slightly bored and confused. I could not understand why he spend so much time and energy to convince me of something that I already knew, just because I had watched him put food on his plate at a dinner party. The way he arranged that food so beautifully, the colours and everything…. well, it made me want to draw a still life of it. It told me not only that he enjoyed food, which is always a plus, but also that he was a sensual man with an eye for proportions and aesthetics. What more do I need to know?

And then he bored me with that monologue. He did not pay attention to me paying attention to him. He never asked any questions, I never told him about my observations and the fact that I would have liked him so much more without the aggressive self-marketing.
Needless to say, the sex never happened. ;-)