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Archive for May, 2009
My Social Nightmare
I’ve been popular since the first memory I have available to me, somewhere around 5 years old.. or maybe 4, if I could actually pinpoint dates.
I’ve had crews since Kindergarten. I’ve always had my close set of friends that do stuff together and then a reputation that emanated from there.
If you had never heard of me in a school that I was in, you heard of something that I did, but you didn’t know I was the one that did it, or you didn’t know that I was the catalyst behind the action.
That doesn’t matter.. I know what I’ve done, and it’s my own personal resume of action, events and achievements. As funny as it seems, being that I’m usually the #3 Bill on Google, behind Gates & Clinton, I’m not actually interested in random people knowing what my name is or being able to spot me in a crowd. I’m DEFINITELY interested in my friends being able to find me and see what I’m doing. It’s basically, if we’ve shared part of our lives together, I want you to be able to get in touch with me if you feel like it.
Having said that, there’s a certain privilege that you get used to when your reputation has preceded you for your entire life. You have nothing to prove to anyone, because everyone who was there knows what happened. Your clients know the quality of the work you did for them. Your homeboys know the fun they had hanging out with you. The chicks you messed with know what you did to them. It’s like the saying goes… ” If you don’t know… You’d better ASK SOMEBODY! :D ”
Spheres of Influence
Social Media has afforded us all the opportunity to expand our spheres of influence. I have friends I talk to on a regular basis from Germany, England, Hawaii, Canada, Israel and coast to coast across the United States. That’s all lovely, but if you don’t manage your online relationships properly, you make yourself beholding to the sites that you use to interact with your friends scattered all over the planet. I’m thinking that that’s what led to my Social Nightmare the other night. :) Read the rest of this entry »
Who’s The Leader In Your Relationship?
ok.. So I’m listening to this conversation that Danielle Ricks hosted, and the gist of it was whether men (in general) were looking for strong women and I hear several times from several people, male & female, something to the effect of a woman “letting” a man lead in the relationship.
This is a very basic, yet fundamental problem, and women need to cut it out, ASAP.
Leadership
If you’re in the army, and woman has a particular rank and a man has a lower rank than she does, he doesn’t get to override her opinions… about ANYTHING. NUTH-THANG!… NOTHING!… NEVER. Case Closed, Done Deal, It’s a WRAP! She outranks him, so by the codes that they live and fight by, he has to take orders from her or peel potatoes in the brig.
There’s a reason why the woman gets to tell the man what to do. She’s put in the work to achieve the rank she’s achieved and he hasn’t achieved that rank, so that’s that. Unfortunately, people don’t tend to apply this simple logic to relationships. Read the rest of this entry »
Time, Part 08: Are you a Google Ad?”
I already went over this in Shilling Away Your Social Capital, but it’s actually worse than I originally thought.
I discussed wasting time in Time, Part 05: “Focus & Motion”. I mentioned how small interruptions in your day can stack up and completely blow your efficiency.
For instance.. If someone sends you an email and you have your mail app running in the background, you have to:
- Recognize that that sound you heard was a new email
- Decide that you’re going to check it out
- Click over from the program you were using to your mail app
- Look at the title
- Look at the name of the sender
- Click on the email and wait for it to open
- Read the text until you have the gist of the communication
- Think about whether you’re going to do anything about it
- [Maybe] Take the time to respond, including possibly researching links
- Click back to the program you were initially using
- Get your head back in the game and get efficient with your project
Now.. That process can take you anywhere from 10 seconds to 3 minutes or even MORE, depending on how much time you’re willing to donate to that person’s query. Read the rest of this entry »
Unfriending Ethics
Social Media is insanely skewed towards positive feedback. Because of this, a stigma is attached to negative feedback, regardless of how truthful that feedback is. People are literally AFRAID to say or type ANYTHING that they might be criticized for… by ANYONE… which necessarily and obviously creates a disingenuous society.
Put another way… As long as you’re being nice to people, you can say whatever you want. As soon as you’re not being nice… TO ANYBODY… you’re out of bounds. As long as everyone agrees with everyone, there’s lots of above-board chatter and clinking of glasses. As soon as someone disagrees, the chatter moves to the back-channel. The criticism or negative belief thrives behind the scenes, it’s just that there’s no trace of it in the same places where there’s a ton of positive feedback. Read the rest of this entry »
Lindz & Bill WorldWide As Usual
Recent Visitor map for Lindsey Chen & Bill Cammack’s article: "Top 10 Reasons to Date a Geek"
Post: May 20, 2009 10:57 am
Screenshot: May 23, 2009 11:00 pm (84 hours live)
Who Cares How Your Day Was?
An incredibly common complaint that women have about men is that guys never ask gals how their day was. That’s because we don’t CARE how your day was. Did you consider that?
Guys tend to ask about things that they actually care about, are thinking about, or would like to hear about. What happened to you at work normally doesn’t make that list. Neither does what happened to you while you were shopping or while you were out to eat with your girlfriends. Nobody cares.
The interesting part about this isn’t actually that guys don’t care, but rather that gals CARE that guys don’t care. Is this something you asked about when you first kicked it with him? Did you check to see how often he’d ask you how your day was? You probably didn’t. You probably checked whether he wants to be in a long term relationship, whether he wants to be in a LTR
