A heartfelt 1 to 1 has value to me only inasmuch as the information is uniquely important to the one person I’m speaking to. If I want to say I posted a new video from a party I went to, that’s general information, which I’d like to disseminate to as many people as possible at the same time in order to increase efficiency and avoid redundancy. Since most of what I have to say is for general consumption and not solely pertinent to one individual, I enjoy one-to-many much more.

The way you (I) build a new relationship with people that you only communicate with on a one-to-many basis is to recognize, appreciate and honor their reaction to your ‘message in a bottle’. Pretty much every time I go somewhere, someone brings up something I wrote or a video I posted, which lets me know they got the message. Not only did they get the message, but they ‘cared’ enough to INDICATE that they got the message. Your reply, which I’m replying to right now, is an example of this.

Another example is that I was at the same party I linked to, above, and I was talking with David Jr. about something, and out of the blue, he compliments me on my 31-episode wedding series that I posted in May. Before that, I had no idea that he had seen “12″, or that he had ever been to my site or seen ONE of my videos at all. I appreciated that and told him so.

A third example is when I’ll meet someone and they’ll tell me they enjoy my dating blog. I’m flattered that they read it and happy that they enjoy it. I might be thinking specifically of them when I write something from that point on, as part of the set of people that might get my message in the bottle.

So, the relationships are built from there. It’s mutual appreciation. Synergy. Electricity. Biology. Seems to me.. It’s Chemistry….

As far as stories that are “worth” telling over and over, haha.. I’m not saying that that’s the case… What I’m saying is that I only have a certain amount of interest in expressing my own stories to someone else. Once I expend that energy, I don’t want to tell the story again. That could be on the fourth or fifth time through, I’m just DONE with it all. This is why blogging works for me. I get to tell the story and then when I’m done, it sits there on the web for people to find when they’re googling for it. So much information would be totally LOST if I hadn’t written it down and floated it out into the universe. Does it really matter? No. However, enough people have approached me out of the blue that have told me they read my material that I know that it’s worth it to me to leave it for people to find. :)

As far as people asking me questions, they normally can’t, because what happens in my life doesn’t happen in most people’s lives. They have no point of reference to question me or even throw in their own similar stories. If they do ask questions, it’s because they don’t understand something or don’t BELIEVE something, in which case, I illuminate the path for them.

They don’t pay me a fee when I’m done because I’m speaking for myself. I’m not speaking for them. Some people, like yourself, express themselves by having kids. I express myself by having ideas, figuring things out for myself and for other people. I enjoy ‘the game’ and just about everything that comes with it. I enjoy the looks on people’s faces when I tell them what I tell them. I enjoy their reactions and comments. My payment is their “getting” of the message. Whether they do anything with that message is only icing on the cake.

You bring up interesting points that I have to think about, and I appreciate that. It’s absolutely true that I’d rather speak to the entire world (as I sometimes do from this blog) than speak to one person and drop some science on them that I’m either going to have to repeat in the future or let go of. I think the desire to communicate one-to-one comes from the belief that the person you’re talking to is unique and is going to uniquely do something with what you’re telling them. If that’s not the case, I’d rather speak to anyone that’s a “contact”, “friend” or “follower” of mine and enjoy the gems I get back when one or more of them inform me that they got the message and I get to acknowledge and appreciate them for telling me so.

Thanks for the comments. :D

I think one-to-one is useful for developing relationships and one-to-many is good for efficiency in broadcasting information and establishing presence.

Thanks for the comment. :)

Are you saying that having a heartfelt 1 to 1 has no value for you? Also, how do you build a (new) relationship with people that you only communicate with on a one to many? Also what kind of stories do you have that are really worth retelling over and over until you’re bored that other people are actually interested in?

“I’m used to the efficiency of saying things one time, having a lot of people get it and then not having to repeat myself” – Do you let people ask questions as you go or do you ask them to hold to the end? Do they pay you a fee when you’re done?

Who says faster and more often = better communication? We spend more effort and time paring down the incoming com stream then ever in the history of man yet we’re just as dead in the end. How is this better?

Bro, help me get my head my around this. :)

As an example, consider a television–a large picture is the result of the simultaneous projection of a plethora of minuscule pixels. With a deeper understanding of each pixel–mechanics, color, etc.–a TV could be developed with a better image. However, if you never stepped back to take a look at the bigger picture, you’d have no idea about the variety of different content that could be integrated onto the screen.

In my opinion, the same applies to people. Societies are not individual entities but rather conglomerates that are made up of individual entities with individual needs. A deeper understanding of each can be gained through attention to both.

I prefer both, with some bias toward one-on-one.