As Steve pointed out, a lot of people can get the impression from what I write and how write it that I can handle all situations. I can’t. :D

There are some situations you can’t turn around at all, and it’s better to bail and cut your losses. There are other situations where if you can just make it through a few rough spots, you can end up with both parties recognizing differences betwen them while enjoying and pursuing shared likes and passions. The way that I’ve found to get through those rough spots is to see them coming and prepare to handle them as gracefully as possible.

In the wine situation, just like you and Frank have suggested, I’m *ALWAYS* “I’ll have what she’s having”. ALWAYS. This is because I personally couldn’t care less which wine I drink. They’re all alcoholic beverages and I’m going to be more drunk after I finish the glass than I was before I started. HIC! This is also because trying to play it off as if I can handle a situation where someone hands me a wine list is only going to make me look increasingly incompetent. I don’t know what I’m looking at. I don’t know what the words mean. Even if I knew what they meant, I don’t know what each one tastes like…. It’s all downhill. Skip it. “I’ll have what she’s having”.

The way I would describe it is like being in a boat in a storm. The storm can be really bad, and scary, but you know that the boat can survive it… IF you do important things at important times. This is why you need to “hold your head”, because if you don’t do those things, the boat sinks, with you on it. If you DO them… Your boat’s gonna look like TRASH when you get back to port…. but you’ll GET BACK TO PORT!, Capisce? :D

I’d rather take a few shorts and look like trash in some areas where I never claimed to have expertise and keep my mind right for when the ball comes back into MY court and it’s time for me to do what I do, which’ll remind her why she’s spending time with me in the first place. ;)

Going with knowing who you are, and being proud of that, after your hind-sight 20/20, and then being in your situation, I might have said with a big smile, lots joy, “wow…you know I almost never go to places like this thank you I’m so excited to be here. What do you recommend?” And then go on to bring the conversation to where you know what’s what and you can turn her on to that.

Thankfully, in the past few years, I’ve been squired to a handful of extremely high-class parties and tuxedoed, sit-down dinners, and I can tell you it’s f’ing boring. Most of the people with sh*tloads of money are either really obnoxious or totally boring zombies. The one tip I can give you is, if you ever get whisked to Sutton Place or the Hamptons and you’re at a party introducing yourself, clearly state your first and last name.

Again, great post.

It’s an interesting topic you bring up. I find it extremely hard to do both at the same time. I either go into a situation to have a good time or to put in work. Once I get to know a chick well enough and we’re used to each other, *THEN* I can just relax and do whatever. The way I see it, due diligence in the beginning of the “relationship” pays dividends during the mid-game and end-game.

But, Yeah.. Under normal circumstances, guys should definitely strive to enjoy themselves as much as possible instead of seeing the date as merely a work assignment, attempting to lock down a chick.

haha And no, I’m not the Sean Connery of NYC. I have my elements, areas and arenas where I *AM* Sean Connery and no chicks can %&$# with me AT. ALL. in those areas. That’s where I go to clear my head out.

I can’t afford to get caught slippin’. :) Just about every chick I was in contact with at the time advised me to go see Vanilla Sky when it came out. haha They were all like “See it TODAY!” :D

That was one of the very few movies I watched in a theater as opposed to on DVD or cable. It was a great movie, and for me, crazy relevant hahaha

Anyway.. The win isn’t in always being cool.. It’s in knowing how to pull yourself out of that spiraling nosedive and still make it happen! :D

When I said ask her for her opinion, I meant thats a pretty good way to get some of that menu pointed out to you. If you throw in a lil “catch of the day/salmon”, it narrows it down even further at which point you could have stopped at the appetizer and the beer(zzzzzzzzz)… You get what you want, have her thinking you give a damn about her opinion-potential for a submisive evening, er ooops, potential for a good time increases. See, theres more to my thoughts than i can type!! lol