I never thought about “the trick” to lying before, but I think it depends on your belief in the lie and what you feel about what the other person thinks.

If she looks fat in that dress and she looks fat OUT of that dress, you’re still going to lie to her face and say she doesn’t, because if you don’t, she’s going to be in a bad mood, which will jack up YOUR good time. So it’s in your best interest to lie and tell her whatever she needs to hear so YOU can enjoy having her around.

Of course it’s a better idea to just say “Meh.. You could be in better shape” and drag her ass to the gym with you, but in the context of this discussion “You look fine” will do.

I had a situation back in the day where this close friend of mine knew I wanted this chick but I was slow in making my moves and/or I was fumbling the situation. I introduced the two of them and they became fast friends and I never thought about it at the time whether they ever hooked up.

I only thought about it recently, years after the fact, and decided that it was highly likely that they DID hook up, which would have made no physical difference to me, since I never got her, but would have made an immense psychological difference because this was a chick I was pretty obsessed with at the time.

When I did consider it, my first thought was that it was a jacked-up thing to do. I wallowed in that for a few minutes and then kept thinking about it and if that’s what happened, I’m glad my boy got some, because I never did. If he lied about it, it wasn’t because he *had* to, but rather because there was no point in my knowing about it. If I didn’t know, I’d be happy/neutral. If I did know, I’d be upset. Either way, whatever happened happened and it would have been better for them to lie to me about it than to admit it.

I think that sense of “It’s better this way” assists lying tremendously. The alternative isn’t preferable.

As far as not getting caught, that’s impressive. :D Lies normally aren’t necessary, unless there’s some kind of punishment or loss you’re attempting to avoid. The less you need from people, the less you need to lie to them. Also.. Even if you NEED things from people, if you’re willing to stand and fall on who you actually are and what you actually believe, lying isn’t often necessary in that case either.

I’ve NEVER been caught in a lie. Never. Of course, I hardly ever need to lie, so maybe that’s why.

I don’t know that ‘becoming’ good at lying is a side effect of studying and understanding other liars as much as ALREADY being a liar helps you to detect other liars’ tells.

In my case, the same style my ex tried to use to lie to me was the style that I used to use to lie to my parents. It was the same kind of lie… nothing important, but enough to keep you out of trouble. Did you go right home after school? Yes, I did (of course I didn’t). Did you do whatever? Yes, I did (I completely forgot about it, but knew that I could accomplish it before they were able to physically check)…

I will say that you definitely have a point as you get to watch how other people trip up and strive to keep yourself from making the same blatantly obvious mistakes.

Cheers! :D