Web: BillCammack.com
Business: Bill C. Quality Control
Facebook: Bill Cammack
Twitter: @BillCammack
eMail: BillCammack
Phone: +1.347.767.5922
Ladies: How To Get To Know Your Boyfriend
If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my blog via RSS feed or by eMail. Thanks for visiting! ~Bill
Ladies!!! You need to stop relying on so-called Women’s Intuition to tell you what your boyfriend thinks about you. You’re going to have to take a proactive stance and figure these things out for yourself.
The best way to do this is to have an honest conversation with him about “Where is this relationship going?”, yadda yadda. If he won’t agree to this, you’re going to need to employ some underhanded methods to get the truth so you know whether you should stick with this guy or move on.
Here are some tips on how to make that happen! ;)
Play Video Games With Him
It’s easy for your boyfriend to be civil towards you while you’re out to dinner or watching a movie. That’s because you’re not doing anything important. Your job is to look good and be sexy. It’s hard to screw that up if you happen to look good and you happen to be sexy.
Now.. If you fail to meet him at the teleporter and shoot the guys that are trying to stop him from capturing the flag, you’re going to find out what he really thinks about you. If you fail to deliver that smoke grenade on-point and he gets shot while trying to secure the base, you’re gonna get screamed on. If you go 0-12 in the deathmatch and y’all’s team loses by 11 points, you might not be getting laid tonight.
Get Him Drunk
It’s easy for your man to play it off that he’s only kicking’ it with you while he’s sober. Take him to the bar/club and get a few dozen drinks in him and see how he acts. If he elbows you, points somewhere and goes “Damn Sunn… Check out that #&$^%’s ass over there! :O”, the memory of your relationship didn’t survive his current state of inebriation.
He should also start talking about things you’ve never heard from him before, such as how hawt your sister is and how you should invite her over some evening soon for the usual festivities.
*NOTE*: Let HIM do all the talking when he’s drunk. Do NOT take this opportunity to try out stuff like telling him you’re giving it up to some other dude. This could cause his “Talk Yang to people you don’t know and have never met over the internet or a video game” mentality to write some IRL checks that his ass can’t cash, leading to your boyfriend receiving what Eddie Murphy would describe as CONSEQUENCES & REPERCUSSIONS! :D
Tell Him You Want To Meet His Parents
This should result in him saying “For What?” before he remembers that he told you that y’all were in a serious relationship. Guys usually aren’t thinking about this, since they only told you that to get you to lay down. Coming out of the blue with something like that or “Let’s move in together” should shock him into a temporarily honest state where the look on his face says “What THE %&@ is she TALKING ABOUT?”, which will let you know that you’re not Ms Right, but rather Ms Right Now.
Tell Him You’re Not Going To Have Sex With Him Ever Again
This should result in you getting immediately dumped.
If it doesn’t, he might actually like you as a person. If he looks hurt and wants to work it out, you know that he was enjoying something about you other than getting on. If he seems to be mentally processing information, he’s going through his rolodex of numbers to figure out who’s going to replace you in the #1 slot.
This might not work for you if a) you’re already known to be a liar, so your word means nothing anyway, or b) he already knows that you’re sprIZung on the dILZNick and you’re never going to stop giving him some regardless of what you say.
Tell Him You’re Pregnant
Besides causing him to immediately stop breathing… This statement should induce obvious physiological changes in his skin tone. If his skin is brown and it turns white, you have a problem. If his skin is white and it turns “I live in Ireland and it’s always cloudy here so my skin and the skin of my ancestors has never seen the sun” white, you have a problem.
Try this while he’s already sitting, in case he faints.
If his first question is “How?”, he’s in shock and never ever considered the prospect of getting you pregnant, since he was having sex with you for fun and/or recreation. If his first question is “Whose is it?”, he thinks you’re a ho. If he doesn’t ask you any questions at all, bring him a glass of water, smelling salts, or call the paramedics.
Related Posts
6 Responses to “Ladies: How To Get To Know Your Boyfriend”
Leave a Reply
Podcast Feeds
The last suggestion is just plain stupid and irresponsible. Lying about being pregnant is just a horrible thing to do to anyone, joke or not. Secondly, any man who hasn’t discussed having a baby with the person they love, or hasn’t planned it, is going to be taken off gaurd and probably be a little shocked. Frankly, if the woman I was with used this ploy I would see her as a head game player and ditch her immediately.
So much for being a dating genius.
Hey TJ. Thanks for the comments. :)
I agree with you that lying about being pregnant is a horrible thing to do to anyone. It’s also horrible when guys lie and say that they’re sterile so they can get the chick to lie down without protection and then she comes up pregnant. Both situations happen every single day. C’est La Vie.
Also, in paragraph #2, I clearly stated that these are underhanded methods. The best way to get to know someone is to talk to them honestly. Barring the ability to do that, people have to get tricky.
I disagree that guys should be caught out there when “the person they love” tells them that she’s pregnant. If you’re keeping your condom game tight, you know whether you spilled in her or you didn’t. If she comes up pregnant, you shouldn’t have to WONDER when that happened. You should know already, because you should be making sure that all your sperm are all present and accounted for after every time you hit it.
If you’re *not* using condoms, then you should assume you’re getting a chick pregnant EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. you have sex with her, so it STILL shouldn’t be a surprise. If she told you that she was on the pill or had her tubes tied or whatever and then she comes up pregnant, well… you just Got GOT.
I must say bill this one had me laughing for a good 5 min. One thing to add to the video game scenario which i thinks works pretty well. Try to do it at a time when he has other guy friends over because you don’t even have really play just pick up the controller upside down two things can happen.
1) He will start giving you all kinds of reasons you cant play with the boys right now, its serous, mans game, we need to win etc.
or.. 2) he will actually take the time to say something like oh that upside down baby let me show you how to hold it the right way.. this means he likes you. if he goes on to teach you how to play then he really likes you so STICK with this guy.
hahaha NOW you’re cooking with GAS! ;)
Absolutely agreed. “Mr. Right” will recognize her willingness to TRY TO LEARN and help her as much as he can and will be proud to have her gaming by his side, regardless of how good she actually is. “Mr. Wrong” will take that opportunity to ridicule her in front of his boys.
Thanks for the follow-up. Cheers! :D
I know we already went over this but I just seen my boy just fell for the get him drunk method and I must admit it works gooood 3 shots and he was already in brech of the bro code.
This is why I don’t drink to many things start rolling out.
Calll me shady but like jack sparrow said a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest
That’s exactly the point. A lot of people are ACTING in their relationships. Alcohol tends to remove people’s ability and/or desire to do that. This is especially true for people that aren’t used to drinking. It’s tough for them to function as they normally would.
This is why you see so many chicks on The Maury Show saying they got drunk and gave it up.. or saying they got drunk and don’t remember giving it up.. or saying they got drunk but they DIDN’T give it up, but the guy they supposedly didn’t have sex with turns out to be the father of their kid.
Similarly, guys tend to fall off their rockers and say and do some apparently out-of-character stuff when they’re drunk, because they forget to keep up appearances. It’s not always drastic stuff either. Sometimes, it’s really simple stuff like holding doors for people, saying “Thank You” or being gracious to the help (waiters, bartenders, cabbies…). It could be that look he gives his girl of “Jeez… You’re REALLY stupid, aren’t you? At least you’re sexy.” that he consciously stops himself from showing her when he’s sober.
As far as homeboys, some dudes forget to play it off that they like to check out their friend’s girlfriend’s ass… Basically, anything that someone told you was true while they were sober is up for reevaluation when they’re drunk. The less drunk YOU are and the more drunk THEY are, the easier it is to get to the bottom of things. :)