Why Women Go To The Bathroom Together

Bill_Cammack_GSX-R_NYC_Night.jpgFrom time immemorial, guys have wondered why women go to the bathroom together. Well… The Kid‘s about to let you know what the real deal is! 😀

Here are five reasons why women go to the bathroom together:

1. Cockblocking

If there’s one thing women love, it’s NOT MINDING their own business. The only thing they love more than that is stopping YOU from getting laid. It’s one of the two things they do to guys that make them feel accomplished in life….

If you’re talking to a gal and her homegirl comes over uninvited, she’s trying to block ONE OF YOU. There’s a very, very, very, VERY low-percentage chance that she’s trying to steal you from her girlfriend. I’ve had this happen, and most of the time it’s been because the blocker considered herself as trumping the blockee in looks or sexuality. It’s basically “If SHE can get the rap to him, I know that *I* can get him too / instead”. It’s flattering and all that, but it’s also corny. Just be happy for your girl and stay out of her business. Stop being greedy & competitive.

There’s an even LOWER PERCENTAGE CHANCE that that’s how she and her girlfriend roll… Like, they do everything together.. Like, EVERYTHING! 😉 I’ve had this happen as well, and the difference is that there’s a comfort level in their interaction with you. When the new chick arrives, it’s like nothing’s different. The original chick is just as comfortable around you and just as authentic with her girl right there. The new chick’s vibe is one of assisting her girl, not competing with or blocking her. It’s like a package deal.. If you want one, you get the other by default.. or at least she’ll be in the same room, watching. 😀

99.987% of the time, you don’t have to worry about this, though. 😀 The reason the chick came over was to “save” her girlfriend from YOU. This normally doesn’t have anything to do with you, but rather that chicks that get caught giving it up like to blame the guy for leading her astray, and then they make deals with each other to stop each other from giving it up when they go out partying.

So, regardless of whether you’re telling her how to do better in her Google SERP rankings or you’re telling her what you want to do to her when you get her alone, her homegirl is going to interrupt her merely because she sees her talking alone with a guy. Don’t take it personally. It’s all in the game. This is why you have to kick your game quickly and not lay back in the cut like as if you’re going to have all evening to chat this chick up. If you want her number, get it up front. If you want her Social Media contact information, get it up front. Every minute you delay, you’re increasing the chances that her no-rap-getting homegirl is going to wonder where her girl is and insert herself into her business.

Anyway, if this chick comes over and makes herself the third wheel, check her body positioning. Normally, if she’s up to no good, her shoulder will be facing you and her body will be facing her homegirl. She’s not there to talk to both of you but to talk to her girl in front of you. Keep an eye on her eyes. She’s going to be trying to communicate to her girl that she wants her to leave with her. In rare cases, a chick will just come over and physically remove her girlfriend from your conversation by grabbing her arm and pulling her ANYWHERE where you’re not located. This is rude as hell, but it happens. \o/

If she’s not that bold, she’s going to suggest that they go to the bathroom together. This is an extremely suspicious move if the establishment you’re in has unisex, single-stall bathrooms. It’s even more suspicious if there’s obviously no line for the bathroom, so the third-wheel-chick should just go to the bathroom by herself, since nobody invited her into your conversation in the first place.

So then, she suggests that her girl goes with her. You shouldn’t care about this, because you should have procured contact information ASAP, so who cares where she goes? You’ll call/text/email/DM her later or tomorrow. If you got caught slippin’, you might be short and you just lost one to the game. After the question is asked, check the eyes of the chick you were kicking’ it to. She’s either going to look like “Damn… She messed up my rap to this guy” or she’s going to look like “YEAH! THANKS, FRIEND!!! 😀 THANKS FOR SAVING ME FROM THIS GUY!” and she’ll eagerly excuse herself and head to the bathroom with her girl.

If she’s a CRUMB, she’ll say she’s coming back and then she won’t. If she’s respectable, she’ll inform you that she’s leaving and not coming back. If she’s interested in you, she’ll go with her girl and then come to find you either where she left you or wherever you migrated to after she walked away.

2. Doing Drugs

Since there’s a stigma against drug addicts, girls like to do their drugs privately. This is similar to how “Easy” chicks like to give it up on the DL so they can act like they’re not having sex with random dudes that they meet on the fly.

When a chick tells you she’s going to the bathroom with another chick, make sure you look her square in the eyes. Do it again when (IF) she comes back. If she used the bathroom, she’s going to be approximately as coherent/incoherent as she was when she left. If she comes back giddy and unable to focus, she was doing something she’s not supposed to be doing. Get Rid Of Her, IMMEDIATELY.

First of all.. You don’t want to accidentally have any kids with this chick that are going to be drug-addicted fresh out the box. Do yourself a favor and pull girls that don’t need to get high to have a good time.

Second, and most importantly.. You don’t want this chick to retardedly start a beef that you’re going to be expected to handle or even lift a finger to deal with. Chicks are souped up enough when they’re sober. You REALLY don’t want to be responsible for them when they’re wildin’ out. Get. Rid. Of. Her.

3. Talking About Boys

The old “Going to powder our noses” excuse has historically been a mainstay amongst women so that they can extract themselves from a situation and talk about the guy(s) that they’ve been hanging out with. This normally happens when you’re socializing with both women, not when the other one shows up uninvited. Basically, there’s something that the third wheel wants to say to her girl or ask her that she doesn’t want you to be aware of.

As long as you’ve been on-point with your game, you have nothing to worry about. They’re going to talk and giggle about you for a few minutes and then come back for more.

The air before this happens is going to be mutual fun and respect between all three of you. Once you get used to it, you can tell whether a chick’s trying to undermine your rap or socialize in a friendly fashion. These breaks are actually useful for you, because you get to check for text messages from other chicks that you intelligently ignored by putting your phone on vibrate, and figuring out where your other homegirls are on foursquare, in case the chicks in the current location don’t pan out.

Now that I’m thinking about this subject, I’m going to start preempting these situations. Every time a chick comes over uninvited, I’m going to ask the chick I was already talking to to come to the bathroom WITH ME!!! :D… well… assuming that the third wheel isn’t HAWTER than the one I was already talking to! 😉

4. Escaping Without Taking Responsibility

Sometimes, the chick you were already talking to will suggest to the third wheel that they hit the bathroom together. There could be several reasons for this, including that she actually has to use the bathroom and that there actually is a long line for the ladies’ room and she doesn’t want to be lonely while she’s waiting or that she wants to ask her girlfriend what she thinks about you. You’ll never really know until she returns, or doesn’t. It could also be that she’s smart enough not to trust her girlfriend around a guy she likes, and needs to get HER away from YOU….

If she doesn’t excuse herself with some form of “I’m not coming back” statement, she very well may be using the bathroom as an excuse to eject from your conversation without owning her actions. Actually, she doesn’t even need for her girl to have interrupted your conversation for that. She’ll just announce that she’s going to the bathroom, and the next thing you know, she’s in some conversation in another part of the establishment as if you never existed and she hadn’t been speaking to you before she left.

To be fair, guys do this also. When new chicks arrive somewhere who are more attractive than the gal he’s currently kicking’ it with, a guy’s liable to bail from a situation in order to pursue what he (currently) *really* wants. The good old “My phone is on vibrator” trick works really well for this when you fake receiving a call and tell the chick it’s too loud in here and need to go outside to take this call.

No matter who’s doing it, this behavior is corny & discourteous if you’re planning to remain inside the establishment where you were speaking to the other person. All you’re doing is letting them know that as soon as you perceive a situation to be “tough”, you’re going to lie about it instead of come straight up with the truth. At least, if you’ve got to lie to get out of a conversation, add the fact that you’re ending THIS conversation to the lie. “Hey. It was nice talking to you, but I’ve got to go find my (non-existent) friends that I’ve been ignoring for the last 30 minutes that I’ve been kickin’ it with you. Google Me. Peace.”

BC_Unforgivable_Feb_2006.jpgAnyway, if a chick uses the old “I’m going to the bathroom” escape trick on you, she’s clearly willing to omit the truth or bend it so she doesn’t have to own what she’s really thinking or what she really wants to do. If you just met her, you might decide to let that slide, since women get hit on every day by men and there’s nothing differentiating you from her other stalkers until y’all get to know each other.

If you’ve already spent some time with her or you’ve been introduced by mutual friends and she pulls this, you might consider erasing her information if you got it before she left. In this age of Social Media, it’s increasingly easy for people’s “behind closed doors” behavior to accidentally see the light of day through pictures & videos that weren’t shot by either one of you.

If that happens, you want her to be the type of chick to go “Yeah. I did it. Mind your business.” and not “OH MY GOD!.. IT’S HIS FAULT!” when it was either her idea or a mutual decision made between consenting adults. If she can’t / won’t take responsibility for not wanting to talk to you anymore at a social function, don’t expect her to be a stand-up person when it REALLY COUNTS either.

5. They’re Lesbians

Sweet! The More, The Merrier! 😀

~ Bill Cammack

14 thoughts on “Why Women Go To The Bathroom Together”

  1. Hey funny “back in the day” story…

    I cant remember when (but early 90’s)I was kicking it to this chick and we appeared to be really getting it together for atleast that night. It was going so smoothly that a few times I “jokingly” mentioned that the beer at my place was colder and when she asked where was that i started singing “hotel, motel Hoooooliday iiiin”… lol we both were laughing even when she responded “Im getting thirtsy you need to stop teasing me!” Soooooo, I started telling my peoples that I was getting ready to leave and she did the same. As she was informing her friends one of them came up and asked her to go to the bathroom. (FYI: it was at this neighborhood hot spot known as the Latin Palace on 2nd between 116 and 115th streets) So a few minutes later she comes back and gets comfortable in the booth (to my suprise because i was so ready to leave I practically had my pants off, but whatever). As we start talking she begins to ask me questions; “So Cisco, what have you really been up to lately?” uhm nada much… “Tell me Cisco, you got a girl?” NO I DO NOT was the truthful answer (I just figured she was crossing the T’s and dotting the I’s before giving up the goods, so I continued with my smug self…) So it kept up for like 5 minutes Cisco this and Cisco that and the look on my face with every answer told the whole story… Every questions is gonna cost her a new position and a new “entry point” for me to enjoy! Hahahaha, I got this. Then she says “Ok Frank, let me finish this last drink and we can leave”. At that moment I Knew I was in trouble. I introduced myself to her as Frank, where did she get Cisco from??? As I “tried” to maintain my cool it finally hit me. The girl she went to the bathroom with was some chick I met at Emrald City a few weeks before and intro’d myself as Cisco and told her I had a wife and kids. Told her I would call her again and never did. Also, back then cell phones where the size of a building brick and it had gone off a couple times, I checked when they went to the bathroom and it was an unknown number. While they where in the bathroom, it went off a couple more times same number. It had been her friend calling first and then the 2 of them calling from the pay phone by the entrance. Why was this a bad thing. The 3rd or 4th question was, “Hey, u got a pager or cell number so my friends can call me later?”, my response was that I did not have either. LOLOLOL… Needless to say this falls under number 1-CockBlocking!! And it worked since I got none that night!! 🙂

    1. oh God. “Latin Palace”. We used to be up in there on the regular, hahaha

      oh no… EMERALD CITY? hahaha We probably kicked it to the exact same chicks back in the day! hahaha 😀

      Yeah. For real. You got PLIZAYED out the pocket on that one! 😀

      Personally, I never had the patience to take a chick all the way to a hotel room. One of the favorites back in the day was The Franklin. Really disgusting rooms, but you could get them at an hourly rate and they were close to around the way.

      One of the first things you want to know about a place is whether they have multiple single-stall bathrooms so you can get some private time with a chick without people banging on the door trying to use the bathroom for what it’s actually supposed to be used for.

      Then again, I don’t have any issues with PDA. I used to enjoy macking chicks upstairs in the balcony seats @ Palladium. No privacy there, but it was dark enough for the purpose.

      Anyway… I’ve been blocked so many times by so many chicks that it’s all in the game for me. All I can do is laugh about it and remind myself to get to the point faster so I can avoid situations like that.

      I’m not much of a phone person either, because I like what I like when I like it. I really don’t have the interest to call some chick who gave me her number. We’re going to meet more chicks later, the next day, the next week, the next month and the next year, so it’s like you get on or you don’t and you keep it movin’ 🙂

      1. LOL…
        Yeah, I was trying to be cool when that huge phone was jiggling my leg while it was going off. Only reason the other girl even knew I had a phone was because I didnt want to take her to a telly and we snuck into her moms place (ya know, since i had a wife and kids, LOL. That big azz phone fell out my pocket and I wound up having to go back the next day to retrieve!! Yeah they played me but it was a learning experience! The Franklin… Still a semi spot if you have FULL day money and its now some pretty full day $$$ thats needed. PDA in the Palladium…You dog you!! hahaha.

  2. Wow, a tactical piece from Bill followed by a FrankCisco, “Back In The Day”, story. That’s pretty good entertainment for a Tuesday! 🙂

    I just wish a chick would go to the bathroom without first giving me that “the seal is broken” line… is that a Jersey thing? What I never say is stop loading up on crap beer and drink smaller amounts of hard liquor, your potty trips are chewing up my time! I mean like, HELLO, this buildings gonna’ collapse if I don’t get back to holding up that wall over there when I get done with you… what was my point again? Oh yeah, chicks plus bathrooms are BAD.

    On a serious note: Yeah, it sucks when folks want to split, they don’t own up to it, and they throw a lie like a magician’s smoke bomb. POOF

    1. hahaha Actually, you have a very good point here. I’m very used to NYC events where you literally can’t see from end to end in the room/bar/club. It’s easy to say “I’m going to the bathroom”, walk away in the direction of the bathroom, never go anywhere NEAR the bathroom and never see the person you were talking to ever again. Easy.

      This is why it became such a common exit line. When I hear it, I fully don’t expect to ever see the chick again unless we were in the middle of a topic that was really interesting TO HER and she’s been holding it so that she could continue the convo, but she can’t hold it anymore. Like I said, it’s all in the game. You have to go into the rap EXPECTING her to suddenly break out or some chick to come over and interrupt her or all of a sudden, her so-called boyfriend shows up when he had told her he was going somewhere else and she has to play it off like she wasn’t talking to any guys tonight.

      If you like the chick, get contact info ASAP. The clock’s ticking from the giddyap! 😀

      1. “If you like the chick, get contact info ASAP. The clock’s ticking from the giddyap!”

        best advice you will ever hear you don’t know how many times i preach this to my homeboys. i have seen so many dimes go down the drain just because homeboy didn’t get the contact info quick. If you do get caught in this situation as soon as the other chick or chicks show up bust out your mobile device and get that info ASAP.

        1. FYI: My favorite was (Im no longer on the prowl) borrowing her cell because I had to make a call. If things went well, I let em know in a joking manner that I already got… Otherwise Its DELETE soon as I step away or she goes about her busines. Most dudes dont know its easier to joke away the balls it took to get the number RATHER than asking around if anyone knows her or if she is a regular!

          1. MAN! 😀 .. That. Is. CRAFTY!!! 😀 hahahahaha

            I’ve never done that one. That’s Great!!! 😀

            At this point, it’s all about Social Media, so I friend chicks on Facebook. What if they’re not ON Facebook, you ask???

            GAVE HER A TOKEN AND SAID SHALOM! 😀

            haha But seriously, folks… If a chick isn’t down with Social Media in the year 2009, I’ll offer her my number. If she’s worth her salt, she’ll call my cell from hers. If she isn’t, fine. I probably didn’t have anything in common with… I probably only had ONE THING in common with her anyway, and it’s not something I would have exclusively gotten from HER, so I really don’t need to contact her at all.

            I guess if you see the chick as a potential girlfriend type, then yeah, you’d want some way to get at her and try to bag her up. Most of the time, in NYC at least, you’ll meet a chick just like her or better the next time you go out socializing, so it’s no big deal.

            I never thought about borrowing a chick’s cell phone in my entire life, because that would make it look like I didn’t have one.

            Having said that, I don’t wear a watch, which is a perfectly good excuse for me to ask a chick what time it is. 😉

            1. Social media works as well but the only only limiting factor is that people don’t all have the same type of access to it all the time and while you and i might be rocking smart phones with full html browsers and getting alerts instantly other people might check it once a day or maybe less so by that time i have already lost interest, and not every body lives in an environment where there is a surplus of hot chicks while simultaneously the number of eligible dudes is steady dropping.

    2. Dude if uou read some of the stuff I have written you would think I was the Sultan Of Panty Gettin’… I got so many back in the days where Im on the short end… 🙂 Lets just say its quite a few! The finished product had a few molds that HAD to be broken as oppossed to “they broke the mold when they made me”! lol

      1. Well, that’s the whole thing. It’s all in the game. I know what I know from trial and error. It’s all happened to me or a friend of mine and it worked out positively or negatively each time.

        You have a good point. I should say also that I’m not bringing up pitfalls I *HAVEN’T* fallen in! 😀 I’m bringing up pitfalls I *HAVE* fallen in and know not to fall in them NOW! 😀

  3. The reason they go in pairs is to know that the entire group is not talking about them behind their backs. Its all about insecurity.

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