Until she said that, I really hadn’t thought about it. My life is basically spur of the moment. I never have the same day twice in a row unless I’m working for the same client two days in a row, which STILL isn’t the same day, because the video is closer to completion and in a different state today than it was yesterday. To me, it counts as the same day, because I know where I’m going and what I’m going to do before I wake up that day. Yuck. :/
Similarly, I don’t know what chick(s) I want to spend time with until I feel like spending time with them. It’s a craving, like how pregnant chicks want pickles in their ice cream. :D (Is that actually true? I think I saw that on The Flintstones one time? haha). This causes scheduling conflicts because I can’t make plans a week in advance to spend time with a gal because I don’t know if I’m going to crave her when that particular day comes around. If I’m not feelin’ her that day and I spend time with her anyway, I can’t bring my A-game to the table and honestly don’t even really care about spending time with her.
Another issue is that the only women you’re going to see me in pictures with are the ones that are involved with Social Media. It’s one thing to spend time together and a completely different thing to broadcast to the world that you’re spending time with someone. There are business-based reasons to not broadcast one’s social life and personal and social reasons to not broadcast one’s social life. Time that I spend with someone isn’t just MY business, it’s HER business as well, so even if I’d personally like to broadcast “HEY! Check me out with this chick! :D”, I’m not authorized to or interested in putting her business in the streets, so I don’t.
Too Many Women
This is New York City. You basically never see the same chick twice, unless y’all have similar travel patterns or you happen to live on the same block or work in the same building. If you live here, try it out for yourself. All this week, when you get on the train at the same time to arrive at your job at the same time every single day, look around the subway car and make a mental note of the women in the car. You can even get in the exact same CAR if you like! :D Make the same notes for the next four days of the week and you’ll notice that it’s never the same gals. Never.
Live like this long enough, and you’ll develop a “There are always more chicks just like this one” mentality. I’m not saying that’s a good thing. I’m saying that it flavors your vision and perception. Lots of guys focus the hell out of pulling ONE chick or impressing ONE chick when it’s much easier here to meet a different chick with the exact same look as the one you’re trying to impress, except she likes you more than the original one did.
My friend Corinne hilariously labeled me as “not really that selective” (hahahaha Which I’m *STILL* getting laughs off of to this day, like a full month later!), but it’s not an issue of not being selective. It’s an issue of finding the EXACT. SAME. QUALITIES in myriad females so selecting between them is just as impossible as selecting which bottle of Evian water tastes better than another bottle of Evian water. You might be able to differentiate between Poland Spring and Evian and you might even have a preference, like you’ll always select Poland Spring if you have a choice, but, sorry. Water is Water. They didn’t put different water into the different Evian bottles. They put a percentage of the exact. same. water. into each bottle.
The only actual difference between equally attractive women is their personalities.
Sometimes you want to hang out with the down-to-earth asexual chick that you know you’re going to have a pleasant evening and excellent conversations with. Sometimes you want to hang out with the alcoholic sex-addict who couldn’t come up with an interesting topic of conversation to save her life. Sometimes, you want to hang out with the world-traveler with the fantastic accent so you can listen to stories about places you never intend to visit in your entire life. Sometimes, you want to hang out with the lesbian that’s going to chase chicks harder than you do while you’re out at the bar. Sometimes you want to hang out with the artsy chick whose views are diametrically opposed to yours, but you really enjoy fighting with her and only love and cherish her MORE after your battles.
Living in a city with literally millions of women, not counting tourists that visit here every single day (and you KNOW how chicks DO when they’re on VACATION!!! ;) hehe) reduces your tolerance for corny behavior to ZERO. Hold the door for a chick and she doesn’t say “Thank You”?.. Instant write-off. She’s a Cro-Mag. Can’t be bothered. Always flakes out on hangouts? Write-off. Never there for you when you have a bad day? Write-off. Likes to use you for Social Media contacts? Write-off.
You don’t have this luxury in the sticks, because there are only a few women to choose from, so you have to basically select the lesser of the evils. You have to select the most attractive chick with the least amount of traits that you absolutely, completely detest and then live with those traits and hope beyond hope that she doesn’t pass those off to your kids with herâ€¦ HOPEFULLY *YOUR* kids! HAHAHA :D
This is why I liken myself and the few like me to Running Dogs. If you happen to be there when we mosse through, you’ll probably get to enjoy the show.. We’re not stopping, though. You couldn’t stop us if you tried. Attempting to do so is dangerous.. for YOU.. emotionally… We’re on an entirely different level. We’re seeing what you’re not seeing and reacting to what you don’t even realize is reality. We’re always on our way through to somewhere else and something else to do, see and be a part of. If there’s something extraordinary about you, you’ll probably get an invite to roll with, or at least meet up with us somewhere in the future along our random travels.
It’s an addiction.. An addiction to desire fulfillment. It’s the same thing that drove Genghis Khan to keep conquering lands after he was already well accomplished, feared and respected. It’s the same thing that drives businesspeople to keep working and creating companies after they’ve already amassed more wealth than they’re ever going to spend in their entire lifetimes. It’s the rush. It’s the thrill of the hunt. It’s being in play, in the game. Striving for what you want right now is better than settling for what you were offered yesterday. Most of the time, you end up empty-handed. Some of the time, you come off with STELLAR days and evenings that make it all worthwhile and gear you up for the next quest/conquest.
This lifestyle isn’t for everyone. I hope I never forget a conversation I had with a friend of mine outside a local bar, where he told me (pardon my French, ladies) “I’m tired of hoes”. When he said it, I laughed my ass off until I realized that he was completely serious. The Game ceases to be fun if you lose the ability to appreciate women throwing sex at you because you look good and/or you have money and/or you’re popular. Sometimes, a guy wants to actually build something with a gal or start a family. You can’t do that with groupies. They’re just as much on the hunt as you are. They’re in it for the thrill of being with you like you’re in it for the thrill of being with them. No more, no less. They don’t care about you any more than you care about them. You can’t trust them any more than they can trust you.
It’s an environment conducive to producing alliances between rogue freelancers. You’re like a bunch of mercenaries that are all drinking and eating together because you’ve all been paid for by the king’s gold to work together towards a common goal. You don’t have to like each other or respect each other. You just have to do your part, have your fun and collect your payment at the endâ€¦ Assuming you’re still alive. :D
Don’t Try This At Home
This is why you probably can’t actually use ANY of my dating advice haha, there isn’t much likelihood that you and I are playing the same game.
I can do and say anything I want, because there are always more chicks. You have to be afraid of losing the one chick you have that you worked so hard to get and that you feel would be incredibly difficult if not impossible to replace.
Also, maybe you already found that one chick that floats your boat entirely, in which case, I’m very happy for you and more power TO y’all! :D It’s an incredibly excellent feeling to be a part of a greatly cohesive unit. It’s a great feeling to want to hang out with the same chick every single day. I’m not knocking that lifestyle, just trying to explain mine.
I live daily on borrowed time.. Not borrowed from myself, but borrowed from other people. I’m that guy in between relationships. I’m that vacation from their daily lives. Nobody LIVES at Disney World, you’ll notice. They get their kicks and go away. Mickey Mouse doesn’t hang out with the same people every day and neither do I.
Like I said, it’s not for the faint of heart. Some people crave stability. Some people crave reliability and reliable redundancy. Some people just don’t have the energy to hit the streets and see what they can do tonight. Some people don’t have the insane amounts of turnover that we have here in Manhattan, NYC, USA where we can go to three different bars within 200 feet of each other, meet 20 people we’ve never seen before in our lives and then do the same thing again tomorrow night.
Is it emotionally healthy? Probably not. We get what we get when and where we get it. Better that than being bored to death or spending time with someone when we really aren’t feelin’ them. I can’t possibly count how many gals I should probably have married that I let slide so they could go do that stuff with someone who actually caresâ€¦ or who’s willing to pretend that they care. Fortunately for me, I almost never feel lonely, yet I’m constantly battling boredom. I’d rather be in the game.. In the hunt.. Runningâ€¦
~ Bill Cammack | @BillCammack