Bill Cammack

Reader Eryka asked me if, in honor of her birthday, I could write something about women that is *NOT* crazy. I will attempt to do so right now, however, I won’t know until the end of this post whether I succeeded or not. o_O

Moving On

So.. Last night, I’m watching this “reality” show, right? And this group of women are friends with each other in that loosely-knit “I’m cool with you until you do or say the SLIIIIIIGHTEST thing that I don’t like, and then it’s ON AND POPPIN’” kind of “friendship”.. I don’t think they qualify as Frenemies, but they’re something close to that.

In fact, even though it’s not the overall point I’m trying to make, they’re not actually friends because they like each other.. They more so tolerate each other because they have intermingled business interests. For instance, one of them would have beef with another one of them, except she can’t afford to because her man is friends with the other chick’s boyfriend.

I only bring this up because in case you know what show I’m talking about, I don’t want to hear that what I’m saying doesn’t apply because they’re not actually friends with each other. :)

So, it turns out that they’re hanging out to “celebrate” one of the gals “moving on” from her relationship to her current boyfriend, whom she’s been with for 9 years, and with whom she has a 3-year-old kid.

By “moving on”, she means she got her own apartment…….. Of course, this has nothing to do with emotionally (or physically) moving on FOR REAL.

What she actually did was attempt a power play, to make the guy realize that she was serious about leaving him.

Unfortunately for her.. ok.. the show comes on once a week, right? :D

Every. Single. Week. WITHOUT FAIL, there has been a report of “her man” being spotted kickin’ it with some random chick.. Not ONE random chick, mind you, but several.

Essentially, “her man” carries himself as if he’s single. All the time. This has been well known, throughout this series, even though “his girlfriend” (aka his babymomma) has tried to deny this to herself incessantly, while her girlfriends do testimonials every week saying “He’s definitely cheating on her.. A Lot!”.

So, now she’s made this power play of getting her own apartment. I don’t see the point of that, because dude was getting laid just fine with “his girlfriend” living in his apartment, so I don’t see why she needed to move. :)

Also, although the chick in question is a Nia Long knockoff, her man is an entertainer with access to tons of groupies… The point being that like Nelly said, “What good is all the fame if you ain’t ******* the models?” o_O

If dude had wanted to stay home with her and screw her all the time, he would have done so. Since he wasn’t, and his exploits were being reported to her weekly, it’s been pretty clear to everyone (including her, or else she wouldn’t look like she wants to cry every time she denies he’s cheating on her), her ACTUAL moving on has already been way past due, however, changing physical locations isn’t actually going to do anything for her other than create more bills that either she or he has to pay.

Oh.. By The Way…

So anyway.. This party is celebrating her fakely “moving on”, and she invites her homegirls, except one of her homegirls invites an extraneous chick.

The extraneous chick is another “girlfriend of an entertainer”, which, I guess, is why she’s on the show and was invited to this small, intimate gathering of friends and frenemies.

One of the things that happens when you have several guys that know each other that can all pull chicks (however they get them, looks, gift of gab, money, sports, entertainment, humor, intelligence, personality, whatever) is that as they mess with chicks and then release them back into the wild, dudes end up messing with the same chicks, intentionally or otherwise.

Like, sometimes, the guy gets a review of the chick from his boy and he wants to make sure he gets some of that, ASAP.

Other times, the women just so happen to be in the same social circles with more than one guy out of a group of friends and they happen to hook up with several guys that know each other.

So.. In a meeting of several gals that all have sexual and platonic interactions with entertainers that know each other, there’s bound to be overlap.

In fact, this happened a while back, in “Basketball Non-Wives”, when one of the women.. Whoops! :) Almost got ahead of the story! :D

So the gal that threw the party is professing the fake bravado and her girlfriends are enabling her.. Blah Blah moving on Blah Blah keys to apartment Blah Blah Blah, so then the extraneous chick essentially tells her it’s good that she’s dumping her boyfriend, because [extraneous chick] used to have sex with her man three years ago.

o_O

Now… If you were paying attention in the beginning of this post, I had mentioned how this newly-liberated, moving on gal had been with her man for NINE years and currently has a THREE-year-old kid with this dude.

Of course, fireworks ensued.

This exact same scenario happened on “Basketball Non-Wives”, where one of the gals told another one that she had screwed her husband back in the day.

Of course, fireworks ensued.

This is what I’d like to discuss, ladies. :) All these fireworks are completely unnecessary.

Blame Game

You don’t get to retroactively apply the responsibilities that come with your CURRENT relationship with the next woman to your PAST relationship to her, ESPECIALLY if you didn’t even HAVE a relationship to her until recently.

Does that make sense? o_O

You can’t get mad at a chick that was not a friend of yours three years ago for spreading her legs for your man three years ago.

If she wasn’t your friend, she had ZERO OBLIGATION to not sex your boyfriend or husband or whatever.

The obligation was….. wait for it……… ON *HIM* to be like “No thanks. I don’t want any of that. My woman at home gets under the table with the cigar and handles all my other sexual needs. Thanks anyway, though. I’m honestly flattered. :D”

Since “your man” didn’t veto the action, you need to be upset WITH HIM and not WITH HER.

If he wouldn’t have hit it, she wouldn’t be at your quaint little party right now, raising her hand, saying “Oh.. You know all those times that you heard your man was hooking up with other chicks?.. I’m one of them! :D”

On top of that, how do you know what the conversation was between her, as a single woman, and “your man”?

How do you know he didn’t say “Nope. I’m not dating anyone right now”?
How do you know he didn’t say “I have a kid with her, but I’m not WITH her”?
How do you know he didn’t say “**** that *****! :) I hook up with whomever I want! :D”?
How do you know he didn’t say “We’re about to break up”?
How do you know he didn’t say “She hasn’t blown me in, like, two weeks already”?
How do you know he didn’t say “Since the kid, she doesn’t want to have sex anymore, so we have an understanding”?

This is how guys DO, ladies, hehe Whatever needs to be said is going to be said. You can’t assume off the bat that the chick KNEW he had a girlfriend and knew that YOU were his girlfriend/wife/whatever, and was doing something directly do disrespect YOU. You also can’t apply this theory years after the fact, with no evidence of ANYTHING indicating what she knew and/or what her state of mind was.

If she steps to you and says she hooked up with your man back in the day deliberately to dis you and knew who you were and wanted to hurt your feelings, then that’s a totally different story.

Somehow, women find ways to totally skip over the culpability of THE GUY in the situation and get mad at “the other woman”… That’s another thing.. Sometimes, *BOTH* women consider the other gal “The other woman”, because that’s how guys set y’all up like you’re the best girlfriend and all the other chicks ain’t ****.

Barks And Bites

Also.. While you’re getting mad at people, how about if you get mad at *YOURSELF* for not bouncing when people kept telling you every week that your man was spotted with this chick and that chick and the cat in the hat eating green eggs and ham?

I recognize that by raising her hand and admitting to giving your man some, she became a physical representation of how upset you have been for years and years and years about these reports of his philandering, but that’s really not her problem.. It’s yours.

Another thing I find interesting about this very typical situation is that women act like other women that want to press up on their men ASK those guys if they’re in committed relationships before spreading their legs.

If she’s coming after him, that’s not how it works. It works like that in the movies and on scripted television shows. Some chick wants to give a guy some and then asks him about his relationship status and he screams “LEAVE ME ALONE, I’M A FAMILY MAN! :O”, and then she either bounces or proceeds to seduce him anyway.

YouTube Link => youtu.be/gvSoSq2m9zM

In fact, women that step to men to get on know that asking stupid questions is going to make it TOUGHER for her to hook up with him, not EASIER.

The Q&A session might come *AFTER* the hookup, as they try to figure out whether they’re en route to becoming his girlfriend, whether they’re going to be in phone/text or social media contact with him COUGHWEINERCOUGH, or whether it’s a “We’ll do this again the next time we do this again” situation.

Regardless.. Like I said.. You didn’t have an agreement with HER not to screw HIM. You had an agreement with HIM not to screw HER.

Therefore, there’s no reason to get mad at some gal that admits she was one of myriad chicks that hooked up with your man several years ago. It also doesn’t exacerbate the situation that you might have been pregnant while he was hooking up with her. If she didn’t know you existed, she didn’t know you were pregnant either, so you can’t add that to her charges.

Regardless of what SHE knew or didn’t know, YOUR MAN knew you existed and knew you were pregnant and he still chose to ‘get in where he fit in’, and if Woody had gone straight to the police, this would never have happened, Capisce? >:D

… Did I succeed? o_O
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