Why Consensual Affairs Are More Damaging Than Sexual Harassment

In reality, half of the people aren’t going to believe the sexual harassment allegations right off the bat, and then half of the people that believe it aren’t going to care.

Rachel Maddow wanted to know what the logic was behind Mike Huckabee saying the following about Herman Cain’s latest problem:

YouTube Link => youtu.be/JXYTGuTSexY

“Greta, It’s a serious charge.

The allegation is one that could upend his Presidential campaign, and I think the reaction that he’s had to it, when he said that, unlike the harassment charges, which he denied, he said this was a private matter.

In essence, he may have given an answer that will be very difficult for him to work himself out of.

I think this is the most damaging allegation that has been made to date, no question about it.”

It’s really very simple and obvious, but it requires an accurate grasp on reality to figure out.

The Problem

This is one of the reasons that I loved “Jersey Shore” so much when it first aired, and until they started watering it down to protect the ‘star quality’ of the cast members… I knew that people were going to be able to see with their own eyes things that I had been telling them for years and that they didn’t want to believe.

Nobody wanted to believe that dudes make out with multiple chicks at the same time.
Nobody wanted to believe that dudes pull a chick, hook up with her, and then pull entirely different chicks the next day, the next day, and the next day, because it’s sport and recreation.
Nobody wanted to believe that guys punch chicks in their faces.

The reason they didn’t want to believe these things is because it doesn’t fit their concept of reality, and they think their concept is correct, when it’s actually brainwashing that they received from their parents, teachers and peers and has no relation to reality AT ALL, except when they’re surrounded by people that subscribe to the same brainwashing.

For instance. You feel safe when you’re standing on a sidewalk, because cars are SUPPOSED to drive in the street. However, I’m fully aware that if a driver screws up or deliberately chooses to or there’s some mechanical failure, that person’s car can come right up on the sidewalk and head right for me.

While you’re busy not believing that the car is going to hop up on the sidewalk, I’m diving and rolling in slow motion like CHiPs, and good luck to you on surviving. 😀

The FACT is that the car can come up on the sidewalk where you’re standing. Your BELIEF that it won’t do that disallows you from contemplating actual reality.

So, in this case, the question is whether it’s worse when a guy is accused of sexually harassing a woman (or three, or four..) or when he’s accused of having a 13-year long friendship with a woman during the course of his 49 year marriage to some other woman, which may or may not have included sex, but definitely included A LOT OF PHONE CALLS, including at least one that’s timestamped around 4am.

At this point in time, the year 2011, everyone’s going to profess that the sexual harassment allegations are more egregious, because everyone wants to appear politically correct.

Meanwhile.. The reality of the situation is that some people subscribe to political correctness, and some people just say they do so they aren’t chastised for what they really think and believe.

Similar to Jersey Shore, this situation is a window into reality.

The People

First of all, you have to consider the women that are making the allegations.

The women that claim that Cain sexually harassed them obviously have a problem with him. 😀 .. It makes perfect sense that they’d want to go to the press and talk about what he did, in an effort to derail his Presidential aspirations, which he never had, by the way, which is another thing I hate about PC behavior is that people have refused this entire time to admit that this guy never was an actual Presidential candidate, and he’s only out there increasing his popularity and selling books, which I said a long time ago, but that’s not what we’re discussing right now. 😀

However.. Cain’s homegirl.. His home-skillet for 13 years.. She’s going to be way more credible when she says she hooked up with Cain.

Not only did SHE say she’s known him for 13 years, but Cain has admitted it as well.

Also, there are phone records showing the recent interactions between them. In fact, a reporter texted Cain on the number in the phone records and Cain called him back.

The only difference between their stories is that she says it was “inappropriate”, which is female-speak for “sexual”, and he says that it wasn’t, and that they’ve been “Just Friends” for the past 13 years.

So, on the one hand, you have a bunch of chicks that Cain is denying interaction with, and then you have one that he’s admitted to knowing. Already, that makes the consensual affair allegation more damaging than the sexual harassment allegationS.

The Proof

Next, you have to consider the issue of proof.

One gal claimed that Cain felt her up in a car. She has no pictures, videotape, or audio of that scenario, plus no witnesses that saw her get into a car with Cain or saw him feel her up = no evidence = that case isn’t going anywhere.

Whether he did it or not, she can’t prove that he did it, so it’s over.

Two more women made complaints and got paid off by the company Cain was working for at the time. Their proof is buried inside the fact that if they talk about it, they’re in violation of the non-disclosure terms of their settlement/agreement, and will suffer consequences that they don’t want = maybe they have proof, and maybe they don’t, but we’ll never know, unless someone leaks the documents = sexual harassment non-starter, as it pertains to Cain’s “campaign”.

The proof in the consensual “affair” situation is that the woman’s speaking clearly and plainly to the cameras, she’s under no legal obligation to not say she’s been hooking up with Cain, she’s providing telephone records that show 60 calls/texts over 4 months to his private cell phone, and even though it hasn’t become an issue yet, she’s said that Cain was paying for her to travel to locations where he was going to be, including mentioning what hotels they stayed in and which restaurants they ate in, which is easy enough to prove with credit card records if she bought anything while she was in the same place Cain happened to be, over and over and over and over…..

YouTube Link => youtu.be/QjnPNqaP9ss

So the proof in the sexual harassment allegations is either “absolutely zero” or “effectively zero, due to legal constraints”, while the proof in the consensual relationship situation is 100% as far as friendship for 13 years, since both have stipulated to that fact, and the only question is whether Cain ever hit it or not.

According to that video, both of them also stipulated to the fact that Cain has given her money, adding to the credibility of the long-term friendship allegation, but doing nothing for or against the affair allegation.

The Perp

Next, you have to consider the guy that’s supposedly doing the harassing and having the affairs.

The situation that’s most interesting to me is the one where some dude was on a pundit show and said that he and a bunch of other people personally witnessed an incident between Cain and a female coworker at some restaurant or party and then shortly after that, she bounced from the job, but he wouldn’t talk about the situation.

That’s interesting because if what he’s (not) saying is true, Cain has felt free to ‘do his dirt’ in public.

I do dirt in public all the time, because I’m single, and I do the **** what I want, whenever the **** I want.

There’s lots of evidence of The Kid doin’ his thang residing on various people’s digital cameras, which will probably never see the light of day, due to #NOBLOG status agreements, but if they do, who cares? \o/

Everybody who was there saw me do it.

I did it because I felt like it.

If I would have felt like being private about it, I would have extracted the chick before making moves.

This is why I’m interested in what that dude on the pundit show hinted at.

If Cain was so bold as to kick it to some chick in front of a bunch of coworkers that all knew he was married, I’ll have to give him dap as far as feeling like he has his employees in deep check, so that they’re not going to snitch on him, hehe but that dog wasn’t gonna hunt once he tried to (albeit, fakely) run for the highest office in the land, and, frankly, on the planet.

Of course.. At the time these sexual harassment allegations were being made, 12 years ago, which makes it around the year 2000, there was no way in hell that Herman Cain was going to ever be considered to run for PotUS, Republican OR Democrat, so how was he to know that his shenanigans were going to ever make a difference?

While we’re on the topic, I’m sure this is one of the reasons that none of the viable Republicans wanted to run for President. As soon as they become frontrunners, people are going to start researching who they know and how they’re related to them, and sometimes, it’s better to leave the skeletons in the closet. 😀

Anyway.. *IF* Cain was kickin’ it to some chick in public, there are enough people that saw it that one of them are eventually going to be approached by a tabloid and offered enough money to snitch on him.

If you watched the video above, that gal says that she met Cain when he was giving a presentation, he invited her out for drinks, he invited her to his hotel room, he told her she was fly (attractive, pretty, beautiful..), he invited her to different locations that he traveled to, put her up in hotels, took her out to eat, autographed two books that he wrote years apart from each other, contacted her 60 times within 4 months, gave her money, and she’s never worked for him in her life… If she’s telling the truth, why WOULDN’T Cain utilize the same M.O. on chicks that work in his company?

This is *ANOTHER* reason why this allegation is more damaging than the others. She has intimate knowledge of Cain and how he operates. The sexual harassment allegations are, let’s say, hit-and-run. It’s like, you roll up. You see what you can do. If she’s with it, good. If she’s not, who cares? \o/ The women don’t know anything about you other than you tried to get on. If they don’t have physical evidence of it, they have no proof, whatsoever.

The President

Next, you have to look at what it takes to become President of the United States of America.

There’s a reason why James Buchanan was the only bachelor President, and that occurred between 1857 and 1861. o_O

You HAVE. TO. BE. MARRIED. to make it ANYWHERE in the higher ranks of govenment.

This is why a lot of these political sex scandals occur. The guys know they have to be married for the sake of their careers, so they hook up with some chick, have a kid or two, and continue living the single life until they get caught out there.

Besides the obvious reason that a President needs to be married, marriage is an agreement. You agree that you’re going to do certain things. You take an oath. You swear up and down on a stack of bibles. You give your word. You tell people what you intend to do, going forward.

Similarly, you have to take an oath when you’re sworn in as PotUS.

An alleged consensual affair is more damaging than sexual harassment allegations because you swore to your wife that she was going to be your #1 chick and you were going to forsake all others, or whatever people claim they’re going to do when they get married.

If you can’t be trusted to not have other girlfriends besides your wife, you can’t be trusted to build electrified fences all the way across the border between the USA and Mexico, and fly drones overhead, and make gas $2/gallon, and evict 12,000,000 illegal aliens from United States soil, and privatize Social Security, blah blah blah blah blah.. You just can’t be trusted.

Once you get *INTO* office, you can screw Marilyn Monroe or Monica Lewinsky or whomever you like.

Before you’re elected, however, you have to *APPEAR* to be someone that takes your marriage vows seriously.

Gingrich is going to have the same problem with his election attempt:


Gingrich has been married three times. In 1962, he married Jackie Battley, his former high school geometry teacher, when he was 19 years old and she was 26.[129][130] Gingrich and Battley have two daughters from this marriage: Kathy Gingrich Lubbers is president of Gingrich Communications,[131] and Jackie Gingrich Cushman is an author, conservative columnist, and political commentator[132] whose books include 5 Principles for a Successful Life, co-authored with Newt Gingrich.[133] In the spring of 1980, Gingrich left Battley after having an affair with Marianne Ginther.[134][135] In 1984, Battley told the Washington Post that the divorce was a “complete surprise” to her. According to Battley, in September 1980, Gingrich and their children visited her while she was in the hospital, recovering from surgery, and Gingrich wanted to discuss the terms of their divorce.[136] Gingrich has disputed that account.[103] In 2011, their daughter, Jackie Gingrich Cushman, said that it was her mother who requested the divorce, that it happened prior to the hospital stay, and that Gingrich’s visit was for the purpose of bringing the couple’s children to see their mother, not to discuss the divorce.[137]

According to L.H. Carter, his campaign treasurer, Gingrich said of Battley: “She’s not young enough or pretty enough to be the wife of the President. And besides, she has cancer.”[138][139] Gingrich has denied saying it. His supporters dismiss Carter as a disgruntled former aide who was miffed at not being asked to accompany Gingrich to Washington.[140]

Six months after the divorce from Battley was final, Gingrich wed Marianne Ginther in 1981.[141][142][143][144] In the mid-1990s, Gingrich began an affair with House of Representatives staffer Callista Bisek, who is 23 years his junior. They continued their affair during the Lewinsky scandal, when Gingrich became a leader of the investigation of President Clinton for perjury and obstruction of justice in connection with his alleged affairs.[145] In 2000, Gingrich married Bisek shortly after his divorce from second wife Ginther. He and Callista currently live in McLean, Virginia.[146] In a 2011 interview with David Brody of the Christian Broadcasting Network Gingrich addressed his past infidelities by saying, “There’s no question at times in my life, partially driven by how passionately I felt about this country, that I worked too hard and things happened in my life that were not appropriate.”[143][144]

So there’s documented proof that Gingrich hooks up with chicks *BEFORE* becoming divorced from his current chick and then trades up. 😀

We’ll see how long it takes before this becomes a central theme for people that don’t want him to become the Republican nominee…

You can do that when you’re already down with the system. When you’re trying to get *INTO* the system, you have to appear prim & proper.

A 13-year “friendship” with some chick that you’d most likely enjoy ******* appears neither prim nor proper during an ongoing 49-year marriage to a different woman.

The Peers

Next, you have to consider the peers that sit in judgement.

This is where the political correctness fallacy comes into play.

Let’s say, for the sake of argument, that one instance of a married guy trying to feel a chick up in a car is true, and one instance of a married guy having a 13-year friendship with a chick is true (whether sex is involved or not).

As far as the car situation, it’s a dude trying to get some offa some random chick…. Who doesn’t do THAT? \o/

Nobody’s going to say that, though, because not appearing appalled is considered condoning, let’s call it, flash-cheating… Something done on the spur of the moment that doesn’t make any difference to your main relationship any more than going to play paintball one day.

Are there a lot of guys that meant it when they swore they weren’t going to hook up with other chicks once they got married? Yes. Are there a lot of guys that get some on the side, and their wives never find out, and their lives go on as usual, with them having some fun recreation with other chicks? Yep.

So, Regardless of what guys tell women, if they hear that Cain pressed up on some chick in a car, the question is whether he got some or not, *NOT* whether they’re going to vote for him or not.

Like, I’ve been saying this whole time that Cain has never been a viable candidate, but when this car thing came up, I wanted to know more details. How did he get her in the car? o_O What made him think she would go for the “casting couch” technique? What did she look like 12 years ago? Does it make sense that he wanted to hit it back then? What was the conversation like when he was driving her to drop her off after she dissed his advances?

Was I there? No. Do I believe her side of the story? Yes. Do I have a logical explanation for that? No. If I had thought he was a viable candidate and I liked his ideas and purported policies, would this event stop me from voting for him? Nope.

Who cares? \o/ He tried to catch some rec. (recreation)

So you can imagine how little people care about these particular sexual harassment allegations that DON’T BELIEVE her story. 😀

On the other hand…..

If it’s true that Cain has been friends with this chick for 13 years, and you happen to consider her a MILF *NOW*, you’d best believe she was pretty tight 13 years ago, and Cain’s been hittin’ it every chance he gets.

This is going to be WAY more damaging than Cain trying to feel up some chick in a car one time, because if you back his play after this, you’re going to have to explain to YOUR WIFE about every single one of YOUR female friends that you may or may not have been tappin’ for the last decade. 😀

This is why a lot of guys are going to have to distance themselves from Cain because of consensual allegations and not non-consensual allegations. The NC stuff doesn’t affect YOUR relationship to YOUR woman, because she doesn’t believe that you’re out in the streets doing the exact same thing.

Meanwhile, when you introduce her to your platonic friend, she believes you.
When you introduce her to your coworker (implying that you don’t have sex with her), she believes you.
When you introduce her to your cousin, she believes you.
When you introduce her to a friend of the family, she believes you.

If any one of those women… *ANY* one of those women step to your wife and say that they’ve actually been having sex with you, your battleship’s sunk.

The Point

In that 12-minute video I embedded above, that woman says repeatedly, confidently, and believably that she’s been hooking up with Cain for 13 years.

She also gives her reason for snitching on Cain… Apparently, someone she knows snitched on her to the press, and she had started to receive calls from them.

Having seen how Cain has downplayed all the other women that have accused him of pressing up on them, she had two choices.. Wait until the press stepped to Cain with this, and have him play her off and talk about her like he talked about all the others, or go to the press herself and tell her side of the story so it’s on tape by the time Cain starts denying.

If she would have waited, she would have looked worse than she does right now, so this decision is the lesser of the evils. She said she knew he was married. She said she knew she was involved in a “very inappropriate relationship”.

Cain (intelligently, for once) didn’t try to deny that he knows a chick that he’s been incessantly in phone/text contact with, so that places him at the scene of the 13-year crime.

In the sexual harassment allegation situations, Cain’s saying, across the board, “These ******* are trippin’!” 😀

If you look at this through the blinders of 2011 political correctness, the sexual harassment allegations seem to be worse, because they’re non-consensual, and you fully expect the perp to deny that they ever occurred, and you believe the accusers, even though they have ZERO evidence and will never be able to win an actual court case or get Cain to admit any wrongdoing.

In reality, half of the people aren’t going to believe the sexual harassment allegations right off the bat, and then half of the people that believe it aren’t going to care.

The entire issue comes down to burden of proof.

The women alleging sexual harassment have to provide videotape or eyewitnesses that prove that Cain pressed up on them, which they either don’t have, or agreed in a settlement/agreement not to disclose.

The woman alleging a 13-year friendship with Cain that he admits to doesn’t have to prove jack-****. 😀 .. It isn’t on *HER* to prove that Cain had sex with her.. It’s on *CAIN* to prove that he didn’t.

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2 thoughts on “Why Consensual Affairs Are More Damaging Than Sexual Harassment”

  1. Well reasoned, Bill!

    For any man who has political or other high profile aspirations; said man should know ‘the rule’. Never ‘hit it’ with someone who doesn’t have as much to lose as you do.

    Because if they have as much to lose as you do, both of you will deny, deny, deny.

    Men mistakenly believe that her ‘love’ for him will prevent her from telling the story. She will sacrifice herself for his glory. That never plays, dude. It was the $$$ and the excitement that ensured her silence. The day that stopped, she would have been horribly hurt, then pissed. He’s lying, she knows it, the entire circus was playing out in front of her; and let’s face it…he’s done with her. She is back to her tedious ‘without Herman Cain’ life. She has nothing to lose. I think a lot more of these situations would come to light, but the woman gets paid to quietly go away.

    His ego sunk him. Just another sad playa who thought his prowess and charm trump the almighty $$$. Ohhhh, men!

    1. As usual, you’re spot-on, Kay! 😀

      That’s totally the way I see the situation.

      According to her, the “physical relationship” ended just before he ran for Prezzo, which means she was moving from “side piece” to “Monica Lewinsky” status at best.

      Cain wasn’t going to be able to afford to meet up with her at any hotels, motels, or holiday inns (SAY WHAAAT? o_O), and on top of that, he’s been assigned Secret Service agents to protect him after death threats, so there’s no way he will be able to discreetly hook up with her until this farce ends and he goes back to selling books, talking on the radio and joining whatever “reality” shows he has planned for next year.

      She was assed-out as far as getting laid, AND as far as receiving money from him, so the game changed.

      On top of that, like I said, she did the right thing for her. Eventually, someone was going to check his phone records and realize that he’s been kickin’ it with this chick, then realize they’ve known each other for a long time, then insinuate a sexual relationship, at which time, Cain was going to play her to the left like all the other chicks and she was going to look stupid after 13 years of loyally keeping this under the hat.

      So,Yeah.. That’s the takeaway here. If you’re gonna have a side-piece, make sure you maintain that relationship as long as you need to… If he would have found a way to hit her off with sex & money while he was running for office, this would never have happened.

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