So I’m talking with a homegirl of mine, and I’m explaining to her the various lies men tell women as a matter of principle, such as “I’m getting a divorce”, “It’s not working out between me and my girlfriend”, “I haven’t had sex with her in months”, blah blah blah, and I’m letter her know that guys know they have to say these kinds of things so women don’t feel like homewreckers for giving it up.
Her response was something to the effect of “They could just tell the truth”, which I immediately found hilarious, because of course that’s what a female would say, because they believe that males tell them the truth.
Meanwhile, guys know that Truth + NotGettingLaid < Lies + GettingLaid, so there's only a percentage chance that women are hearing factual information from their love interests.
However.. Instead of just laughing and moving on, I decided to think about this... Is it a valid tactic to tell women the truth? o_O
Especially in major cities like NYC, where there are way more women than men, women are sharing men whether they know it or not.
It becomes a way of life.. For the guys, it’s like “Why have only one girlfriend when you can have three? :D”. For the gals, it’s like “Why have zero boyfriends, when you can have one (which you happen to share with several other women)”.
So, in a scenario where men get to select from a pool of women, telling the truth is actually a valid tactic, because you need to weed out the… er… less-functionally-useful women as soon as possible, so your time is spent primarily with women that enjoy your company and want you to enjoy theirs.
If you already have girlfriends, you can let the new chick know what the deal is, which is that you want to put her on The Roster, then she can agree or decline.
If you’re currently fresh out of girlfriends, you can inform her that you’re trying to rebuild your roster, then she can agree or decline to get involved with your system of sexual recreation.
The reason why I was laughing is that this normally doesn’t work. :) Most guys have to feign being in an exclusive relationship with a woman in order for her to become functionally useful to him. This is why they have to lie about getting divorced when they know their wives are very happily married to them and then the divorce never happens… He knows the concept means something to the gal he’s trying to hook up with and means nothing to him.
That’s one of the funniest things about the dating game… Guys can say whatever we want, and it doesn’t mean ANYTHING, but women believe it means EVERYTHING.
So when a guy says “I’m getting divorced”, women interact with him as if he’s getting divorced… Like, ACTUALLY getting divorced, when they have ZERO PROOF of anything he said.
Meanwhile, if a gal tells a guy she’s getting divorced, he’s thinking “Who cares? I was going to hook up with you, regardless.”
Do you see the difference? :D
It’s not like we actually believe what she said.. It’s that we don’t care.
If time passes, and the chick never gets divorced, who cares? She was making herself useful this whole time, so it’s all the same to us. \o/
This is why women think telling the truth would work for men. Women say “I’m happily married and I feel like giving you some! :D” and men go “ok”, and everything’s kosher.
Of course, it’s easier to tell women the truth when it’s what they already want to hear, like that you *ACTUALLY* only want to have sex with them.. you feel like having kids with them.. yadda yadda
That’s not really the point of this discussion.
The question is really whether you inform women of what’s really going on when your worldview is different from theirs, at least as far as dating’s concerned.
Like, let’s say you want to hook up with a chick and she’s a Republican, and you feel like Republicans are always doing and saying creepy things.. Do you tell her the truth and say “I think y’all are pretty creepy in general, but I like you as an individual, and am looking forward to having sex with you :D”, or do you not mention politics at all, therefore lying by omission? o_O
If you meet the chick that flips burgers at McDonald’s, do you tell her “I have no intention of marrying a gal that doesn’t make more money than I do, or who isn’t a trust fund baby, but I’m willing to screw you until I settle down with some other chick :D”, or do you leave it out, therefore lying by omission? o_O
I think telling women the truth is a good tactic, if you can afford it… It either accelerates your relationship to them or stops it in its tracks. :D
Having said that.. a) most guys can’t afford it, and b) the guys that *CAN* afford it know that it’s not as efficient as lying, so I don’t think we can look forward to a global wave of male truth-telling anytime soon…..