So HuffPo recently posted an article about Alicia Keys not wearing makeup to the VMAs (The MTV Video Music Awards), entitled “The Anger Provoked By Alicia Keys Not Wearing Makeup To The VMAs Is Sadly Not Surprising”.

The only reason I even clicked on this article was because of the words “Anger Provoked”.

First of all, Provoke ( means to cause the occurrence of (a feeling or action) : to make (something) happen : to cause (a person or animal) to become angry, violent, etc.

So, for instance, if I punch you in your face, that means I’ve provoked you to feel hurt and/or to fall on the floor.

My action (smashing your grill) caused your reaction (feeling emotional or physical pain and/or losing the ability to continue to stand up).

A chick not wearing makeup can’t provoke anyone to do anything.

This is part of the problem with Social Media in its current form. Everybody thinks we care what you think.

We don’t.

Nobody cares whether you like what Alicia Keys looks like with or without makeup. That’s the problem of whoever’s hooking up with her.

This is the part where certain women start complaining about how a chick looks is up to her and not her boyfriend.

That’s absolutely true, so long as a) she doesn’t have a problem being lonely because nobody feels like dating her, or b) her boyfriend is a Herb that will accept her in any ridiculous state of physical disrepair.

So as far as the point I’m making right now, what Alicia Keys looks like can’t possibly *provoke* any random nobody bloggers to feel upset, angry, or violent, because it’s none of their ******* business.

So then after that, I was wondering who it might have been who was “angry” about how Alicia Keys looks without makeup, which is the second reason why I clicked on the article.

I noticed the other day that a bunch of nobodies were trying to disrespect American Olympic Hero Gabby Douglas about her hairstyle.

Meanwhile… Gabrielle Christina Victoria “Gabby” Douglas[4] (born December 31, 1995)[5] is an U.S. artistic gymnast. She was a member of the United States women’s national gymnastics team, dubbed the Fierce Five by the media, at the 2012 Summer Olympics, where she won gold medals in the individual all-around and team competitions. She was also a member of the gold-winning American team at the 2011 and the 2015 World Championships,[6] and the all-around silver medalist at the 2015 World Championships. She was part of the Final Five at the 2016 Summer Olympics, where she won gold in the team competition.

Douglas is the first African American or the first of African decent of any nationality in Olympic history to become the individual all-around champion,[7][8] and the first U.S. gymnast to win gold in both the individual all-around and team competitions at the same Olympics. She and Simone Biles are the only two American all-around champions to win multiple gold medals in a single Olympic Games. Douglas is the first female reigning Olympic all-around champion to return to the World Championships and medal in the all-around since Elena Davydova in 1981. Gabby Douglas is also the reigning AT&T American Cup all-around champion.

So, Actually.. πŸ˜€ Your opinion of her hair amounts to less than zero.

Your opinion is not even “nothing”. It doesn’t even get on the radar far enough to count as “nothing at all”.

Having better-looking hair than hers will get you nothing but kids from disappearing sperm donors.

You will step nowhere near an Olympic trial or stadium in your entire life unless you buy tickets and cheer for people like Gabby Douglas from the stands.

You would have to be someone who you are not in order to have the ability to insult someone who’s doing amazing things in life.

Dancing In The Dark

The point being that these internet people consider themselves peers because they have a smartphone they can type on just like musicians and athletes do.

No. You are not peers. You’re sitting in the peanut gallery chirping about who cares what you’re chirping about.

So that’s what got me to click the article. πŸ˜€ I wanted to know who it was who had the nerve to think their opinion about how Alicia Keys looks without makeup counts for anything at all, other than whoever it is that has to look at her and feel physically attracted enough to tax that ass like the government.

Now.. Granted… πŸ˜€ When I got to the article, they have a picture of her that looks like any random chick from around the way.

Again, I don’t see what that has to do with her singing ability, her performance ability, or the crowd’s enjoyment of her performance, if she performed, because I don’t watch the VMAs so I don’t know or care.

What I *DO* know and care about, haha πŸ˜€ is that there are two ways that chicks look.. WITH and WITHOUT makeup.

In fact, there are THREE ways that chicks look. Without makeup. With well-done makeup. With tacky makeup.

Here’s the thing… If you spend any significant amount of time with a chick at all, you’re eventually going to see her without makeup.

Sooner is better than Later.

Immediately is better than Sooner.

It’s really the best thing for a dude to be able to assess how a chick looks in her worst-case scenario.

I guess I got used to this in college.

When you see chicks in your dorm and you see chicks when they’re studying and you see chicks when they’re in class at 7:30 in the morning after studying all night, you get a baseline understanding of their worst-case attractiveness.

If you’d still hook up with her when she’s looking like that, you’re In Like Flint unless she doesn’t understand how to apply makeup to her face and crosses over into the tacky zone, in which case a) she looks like a circus clown, and b) you’re embarrassed to be seen with her, and c) honestly, it’s a turn-off when a chick doesn’t realize that she’s cute as-is and she thinks she has to cake a bunch of nonsense on her face in order to be aesthetically attractive.

Personally, I don’t understand how dudes end up dating chicks they’ve never seen without makeup.

I also don’t understand how dudes marry chicks they haven’t hooked up with, but that’s a different topic for a different day. πŸ˜€

The funniest thing I hear about this topic is about chicks “leaving their face on the pillow”! πŸ˜€ HAHAHAHAHA oh man πŸ˜€

The only way that could happen is if the chick was paranoid about the dude seeing what she looked like without makeup so she didn’t remove all that **** before she laid down.

No Bueno.

So.. As far as I’m concerned.. If you don’t know what a chick actually looks like and you still date her, you get whatever you deserve when you finally see her without makeup. Β―\_(ツ)_/Β―

Now, The Kid isn’t blameless in this situation. πŸ˜€ I’ve met chicks in the dark and then was surprised when I saw them in the least amount of light, except I broke North with no delay.

Understand what I’m saying, here… πŸ˜€ I’m not saying that chicks need to utilize makeup. I’m saying two things:

a) If a dude is going to date a chick, he NEEDS to like how she looks without makeup, because eventually he’s going to see her face like that.

b) If you aren’t dating that chick, how she looks is none of your ************* business.

Monetizing Worthlessness

So returning to the article, like I said, when I saw the picture they showed, I wouldn’t have been able to tell that that was Alicia Keys at all, because she had previously utilized makeup for every picture or video I’ve ever seen of her.

I don’t think she looks bad at all. She just looks regular, random, average for the types of chicks I’m used to seeing in NYC, and there’s nothing wrong with that at all.

Similar to Gabby Douglas, people admire Alicia Keys’ talent. How either one of them looks “on or off the court” is irrelevant.

They included a link to an article that Alicia wrote herself, which is a good and recommended read, entitled Alicia Keys: Time to Uncover.

The funny part about all this is that the HuffPo article was written in the first place. πŸ˜€

In this Loser Society we currently live in, long strides are taken to convince nobodies that they’re somebodies.

For instance, it’s in the best interests of YouTube video content creators to suggest that people comment on their video.

This isn’t because anybody gives a flying **** what you think.

It’s because in order for you to comment on a YouTube video, you have to click on it, which serves another ad and pays that person a few AdSense pennies.

Those pennies turn into dollars if you can get 100,000 people to argue with each other on your video about some tomfoolery that never should have been publicized in the first place.

So thanks to the Loser Society, when Alicia Keys takes a picture without makeup, there’s an entire industry of videos and blog posts (including this one, which does have AdSense ads on it) where people are receiving pennies or dollars for giving their opinion about something that happened, which probably wasn’t newsworthy to begin with.

For instance.. There will be a rapper that you’ve heard of in the past, but he hasn’t made a record AT ALL, God Forbid an actual HIT SINGLE in the past ten years, but there’s an industry for videotaping him saying some nonsense about someone else just so they can post the headline “Defunct Rapper Has This Opinion About Some Other Rapper He Doesn’t Even Know And Has Never Met In Life”.

Once you do that, people tune in to see what this decrepit human being has to say. After that, they comment under your video. After that, someone disagrees with them and they start going back and forth, increasing the “views” on your video and serving more advertisements.

After that, someone else steals your video and does a “Nobody Videoblogger REACTS To Decrepit Rapper Talking About Some Other Nobody” video which sparks a revenue stream for the reacting blogger.

After that, you have the people who steal videos and make compilations of “The Top Ten Reactions Of Nobodies To Decrepit Rappers Who Nobody Has EvAr Cared About During The 21st Century” and you have layers upon layers of people who are receiving advertisement pennies for reporting on reports about non-newsworthy items.

I’m not knocking that hustle. πŸ˜€ I’m just telling you it’s a hustle.

So when I see a headline that reads “The Anger Provoked By Alicia Keys Not Wearing Makeup”, I’m like first of all mind your own business, and second of all, unless you can do what Gabby or Alicia does, nobody cares what your opinion is about ANY aspect of their physical presentation.

Fake It ‘Till You Make It… Or ‘Till You Don’t

At the end of the day, whether a gal utilizes makeup or not is up to her.

Women who perceive themselves to be naturally, genetically, aesthetically pleasing aren’t concerned with makeup at all.

Women who perceive themselves to be less than facially attractive apply fake eyelashes, cake on makeup, and shave their eyebrows with the hopes that they don’t forget to draw them on before they leave the house and that they don’t sweat them off during yoga.

Unfortunately, stuff like this is deeply ingrained in lots of women from childhood, so even if you’re dating a grown-ass-woman and tell her she looks great without makeup, she isn’t going to believe you because she’s lived her entire existence believing that she’s ugly and she needs to wear a mask if she’s going to be seen by anyone else in life.

So as far as the no-makeup initiative, or whatever movement this is supposed to turn into, I think it’s a worthwhile one.

It’s just that some chicks are going to be perceived as attractive without makeup and others aren’t.

It’s like how some fashions are made for a particular body type and just because you were able to afford it doesn’t mean it looks good ON YOU.

Similarly, some chicks can get away with short haircuts without looking like homely boys.

Some women are going to benefit from stopping using makeup and others are going to experience a deterioration in their quality of life and quickly return to caking it on.

We won’t even discuss bleachers. πŸ˜€ hahahaha Someone sent me a picture that I thought was some South American Drug Dealer and it turned out to be Sammy Sosa!!! πŸ˜€ hahaha

Dem ah bleach
Dem ah bleach out dem skin
Dem ah bleach
Fi look like a brownin
Gal me honour you
A you nuh bleach out yuh skin
You nuh use no chemical fi look like a brownin

So basically, if you want to fully enjoy dating, make sure you can throw her entire body into a swimming pool and then when she finally resurfaces, you aren’t like WTF is that? o_O… no.. really.. What *IS* that? o_O

If the eyelashes are gone, you need to be good with that. If the hair is trashed or it floated away, you need to be good with that. If she was wearing a push-up bra that isn’t pushing up, you need to be good with that. If the red, blue, and green she painted on her face is gone, you need to be good with that. If she was wearing ass pads that are sagging because now they’re retaining water, you need to be good with that. If her Timberlands remained at the bottom of the pool and you don’t appreciate her dogs, you need to be good with that.

You’re way better off spending time with a chick whom you like to look at in her worst case scenario as opposed to a chick you wouldn’t recognize if you passed her in the street without her makeup.

As far as the ladies, y’all are going to have to make the decision for yourselves whether you’re willing to take your chances with the level of attractiveness your parents have genetically endowed you with and that you’ve maintained or not throughout your years of life.

If you’re not getting the dates you want with your natural grill, paint on it.

Just recognize that eventually the dude is going to see you as-is, and then your relationship will either continue or smash face-first into a brick wall.

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