Let’s talk about reality for a second, here. 😀
There’s this article entitled “Childish men are to blame for women having kids late in life”.
This is dumb right off the bat.
Right from the title, it doesn’t make any sense.
It’s similar to mothers who blame their extremely young kids when they freak out and scream at them.
If you can’t outwit a baby, the problem is with *YOU*, not the baby.
I’ve seen chicks in the street screaming at kids strapped into strollers.
I’ve wanted to ask them “Are you crazy? o_O”
Except I knew they were crazy because they were screaming at the top of their lungs at a baby that doesn’t even understand English, so I kep’ it movin’.
Professor Hyde White! :O
So since the title mentions childish men, it begs the question are you or are you not a grown-ass woman? o_O
Like.. Imagine that you were a MLB player (the pro league of American baseball) and it was your turn to bat against a Little League pitcher.
If the title of an article read “Little League Pitcher Is To Blame For Striking Out Major League Hitter”, you would be laughed off the planet.
So how could it be that childish men have any influence at all over grown-ass women?
So if your plans got thwarted like a villain at the end of a Scooby-Doo Mystery and you would have gotten away with it too if it hadn’t been for those meddling kids, you just got chumped off by kids.
This makes your villain ability sub-kid quality.
How in the world are childish men going to affect grown-ass women at all?
I mean, do you know any grown women? 😀 hahaha
“Grown” doesn’t mean that it’s legal for you to drive and/or have sex.
Grown means you do what you want to do when you want to do it and exercise your free will.
This includes having kids. If you want to have kids, have kids. How is some childish dude going to stop you?
Make It Good To Yourself
One friend of mine who shall remain unnamed other than to say she lived here in Manhattan, NYC at the time this discussion occurred, told me directly that she was looking for a guy to have a kid with.
A. Guy. To. Have. A. Kid. With.
She didn’t want his child support. She didn’t want him. She didn’t want a relationship, not a boyfriend, not a husband, she wanted A. KID. and she knew exactly how she was going to make that happen.
I think when she told me, she expected me to be shocked.
I knew how lame dudes were because they’re my so-called “competition”.
I know all the tricks they use to get chicks to lay down and spread their legs. I know how many accidental kids they’ve had. (We won’t get into “accidental” kids when dudes thought they were going to get over with the pull-out method and then never pulled out.)
I wasn’t surprised. I was glad she shared that with me. She definitely had the looks to get a dude to wittingly or unwittingly give her a kid and that’s what she did. She had her kid (great kid, BTW), lived in Manhattan for a while longer and then moved away to enjoy HER LIFE with HER KID that SHE WANTED so she made that happen.
I would guess (though I didn’t ask because I don’t care) that she got her kid and bounced before she was 28 years old.
This just makes miserable older chicks look even worse for complaining about what they didn’t do while she stated her intent and made good on that intention.
I didn’t ask her why she felt that way or how she came to that conclusion about her path in life.
To me, it made perfect sense.
She was making good money, obviously, to be living in Manhattan in the first place.
She was attractive, so she had been through a gazillion dating situations and didn’t find anything that worked out for her long-term or that convinced her that finding a guy like that was possible.
She could afford to fund her life and her kid’s life. Having some unnecessary dude around would have been a nuisance to her. With her looks, it would have been easy for her to extract semen from the donor of her choice.
No sperm bank payments. No frozen egg payments. Pick the dude, get what she wants, move forward.
Being in the trenches, I’m aware that there are successful women and unsuccessful women, both in business and dating.
Those are two different areas of expertise, like the dude that has the Porsche and the $2,000,000 penthouse apartment and still has problems getting laid.
One of the things women seem not to realize is that the situation gets BETTER for men as they age and it gets WORSE for women.
Essentially, the advantage switches from looks to money.
A guy on a monetarily upwardly-mobile career path sees his opportunities with women increase.
A woman on a monetarily upwardly-mobile career path sees her opportunities decrease.
This quote from the article unwittingly outlines this:
Women want an equal partner, but there are increasingly fewer candidates to choose from. The census reports that “the average adult woman in the US is more likely to be a college graduate than the average adult man.” Moreover, today’s young, childless female city-dwellers with college degrees are out-earning their male counterparts by 8 cents on the dollar.
Let’s consider the title, where the point is that women are having kids later in life.
My homegirl I mentioned above had her kid when she wanted to.. when she planned to.. when she intended to.
I didn’t ask her how she accomplished her goal or anything about the witting or unwitting sperm donor.
It doesn’t matter. She got exactly what she wanted. Nice work.
So what does college graduation have to do with chicks having kids? Nothing.
What does out-earning male counterparts have to do with chicks having kids? Nothing.
This is why guys gain such an advantage as time moves forward.
Guys have no problem dating-down, but women do.
Down in age. Down in social status. Down in achievements. Down in physicality. Down in height. Down in bank account balance. Down in ability to speak the native language of whatever country they happen to be in. Down in intelligence. Down in earning potential. Down Down Down Nobody Cares.
Meanwhile, women who refuse to date-down take themselves out of the game and then complain about the game they took themselves out of.
Dude is younger? No kid.
Dude is from a lower social class? No kid.
Dude has achieved less in life? No kid.
Dude can’t deadlift as much as she can? No kid.
Dude isn’t taller than her? No kid.
Dude isn’t richer than her? No kid.
Dude can’t speak the language? No kid.
Dude is dumber than she is? No kid.
Dude earns less than she does? No kid.
So this is what women should *REALLY* write articles about. How they take themselves out of the game.
The older dudes get, the more money they make and have and the more women are available to them for dating, sex, kids, whatever.
The older women with this particular mindset get, they never switch over to dating-down and keep trying to date-up regardless of how successful they become, and then they run into the next brick wall.
Scarcity & Competition
Let’s consider this scenario presented in the article:
Susan, 41, a single senior marketing executive from the Upper East Side, is eight months pregnant. After waiting for her match and not finding him, she decided to have a baby on her own.
Good for her. Good choice. Make it happen. 😀
Now.. First of all, we don’t have any pictures of these women.
Loser Society dictates that everyone gets a participation award. Real Life doesn’t work that way.
If nobody wanted to hit it, “Susan” could have been waiting forever to have a kid. She did the right thing.
These types of articles don’t want to talk about how the ratio is 5 women for every 1 man in NYC to begin with, so the competition is outlandish.
I wrote about this approximately a decade ago and nothing’s different. -> BillCammack.com/2008/04/19/6-reasons-new-york-city-is-the-neverland-of-dating-for-da-fellaz/
There are a lot of women who think they’re competing and they aren’t.
But let’s say “Susan” hadn’t made the right choice and remained in the game.
Guess what?… 41-year-old dudes aren’t dating 41-year-old women.
They’re dating 31-year-old women, which leaves 50-year-old men for 40-year-old women, and where are they supposed to find those people? 😀
They can try Restaurants. Cigar Bars. Social Clubs. But they aren’t going to run into them randomly in regular bars where the vast majority of people hang out in Manhattan.
Another problem is that just like guys don’t care about dating-down, they don’t care about dating-up either.
Meaning that if they don’t want to hit it and she makes twice as much money as they do, who cares? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
So Manhattan NYC isn’t the place to look for “equal partners” or unicorns.
In the film Minority Report, the Precogs have the ability to see into the future and predict what people are going to do.
A NYC friend of mine whose clock isn’t yet ticking has the exact same “problem” when it comes to dating.
She’s too intelligent to be able to dismiss the obvious disqualifying flaws of her suitors so she has major problems with committing to a long-term relationship.
She’s heading down the same track as the women in the article, except she’s already seen the future and she can’t afford it.
She isn’t, however, being thwarted by meddling kids. She can’t be. She’s a grown-ass woman and her life is progressing in stellar fashion.
It’s just that there’s impetus not to procreate with people who don’t know the difference between there, their, and they’re.
If you ask her on the first date if she’d like a sangwich, you’ll never make it to the second date.
I’ve never asked her because I don’t care if she intends to have kids or not.
The reason I included her here is because she’s way more of a catch than the women that were mentioned in the article, so it’s way tougher for her to consider someone a so-called “equal partner” to her.
What is she supposed to do?.. Settle for less and then kick herself every day? 😀
She enjoys herself, spends her time well, and que sera, sera.
I meant to talk about the elements of the article but I barely did! 😀
There’s 34-year-old Kate, who works in finance downtown. “She’s beautiful, smart, talented . . . everything going for her,” her colleague tells me. “But her boyfriend doesn’t feel settled in his career”
Finance is pretty much the top of the food chain.
If she’s a trader, she’s making enough money for her, him AND their potential kid, so “I don’t feel settled in my career” has nothing to do with having kids.
What does that even mean?.. That he thinks he’s going to be the one raising the kids? That’s what nannies are for. That’s what money is for. Money she already has.
This boyfriend’s career isn’t even mentioned. Does he not feel settled as a pizza-maker?
The latest US Census Fertility Report, published last week, found that for the first time in reported history over half (53.8 percent) of women ages 25-29 are childless and a record 30.8 percent of American women ages 30 to 34 haven’t given birth. Most of these women are college-educated. And most are single.
Like I said.. Nobody intentionally procreates with someone dumber than they are.
It happens. Condoms break. Dudes forget or “forget” to pull out. Chicks weren’t on the pill like they said. etc. etc.
However, women are going to have to overcome their brainwashing against dating-down if what they really want is to have kids.
There’s the 80/20 rule, which applies to many things, but applied to dating it means that 80 percent of the women are competing for 20 percent of the men and vice versa.
Assuming an equal population of men and women, 4 women are competing for every 1 guy.
This has nothing to do with the population in a location, such as how I said NYC has 5 women for every 1 guy. Not all of those “1 guy”s are viable candidates for procreation.
Those are just the men that are physically available in the location. The 20% that women are chasing have to be selected from that group.
On top of that, intelligent people have things to lose so they aren’t as, er, let’s call it, procreationable as dumb people.
The smarter a woman is, the more discriminating she’s going to be and the more likely she’ll be able to procreate with a vetted male of her choosing.
oh.. We aren’t going to get into the skyrocketing male and female obesity statistics because that’s beyond the scope of this discussion.
Success & Kids
I found this part interesting:
It’s not surprising then that a 2012 Pew Research study found, in a reversal of traditional gender roles, that while two-thirds of millennial women say that “being successful in a high-paying career or profession” is of high importance to them, only 59 percent of young men do.
First of all, 2/3 = 66%, which isn’t much higher than 59%, so let’s compare apples to apples.
The question is what the value is of “being successful in a high-paying career or profession”.
Some of the most unsuccessful dudes in this town have the most kids.
A lot of the most unsuccessful females in this town have the most kids.
If that’s your goal, having kids, what’s the point of being successful?
Yes, you should be living a miserable, slovenly life, but the point of the article was that women were having kids later in life because dudes were playing Xbox.
Some of the most Xbox-playing dudes have the most kids.
What I’m saying is that if you want to have kids, have kids, but do like they say in the store and hurry up and buy.
Manhattan isn’t the place for women to try to corral a dude who’s enjoying essentially 20:1 odds.
(5:1 population x 4:1 viability)
If there’s a dude a chick’s throwing herself at, there are 19 other chicks doing the same thing, potentially on the same day, and all living one Uber or Lyft ride away from Netflix & Chill.
On top of that, a lot of guys here aren’t even FROM here. They MOVED here so they’re just starting to enjoy their lives and have no intention of a) settling down, or b) decimating their bank accounts with childcare costs.
I’m not saying y’all shouldn’t try. 😀 Just recognize the uphill battle you have ahead of you.
A friend of mine just posted her ultrasound pic on Facebook yesterday. Congrats to her and her husband! 😀
I don’t know whether she met him in NYC but still.. The fact remains that grown-ass women are having kids regardless of what Xbox-playing dudes think, do, or say.
Women who insist on dating-up are exponentially decreasing their chances to have kids because of competition from women who are the same age and more successful than they are and women who are better-looking and younger than they are.
If you went through all this trouble to make money, why do you care how much money the guy makes? o_O
Go out with that starving artist. Go out with that shorter-than-you dude. Go out with that guy who can’t afford the yearly dues to your social club, and who wouldn’t have been accepted as a member even if he had enough disposable income. Go out with that musician. Find fun. Find excitement. Find love. Do the same things you would have done if *YOU* were broke and he was your social superior.
OR enjoy commiserating with other successful businesswomen about why you didn’t do what you wanted to do with the one life you’re ever going to have, and it’s all because of childish dudes who would rather finger their Xbox controllers.