Guide To Dating The “Internet Famous”

If you enjoy anonymity, it used to be that the only people you had to worry about dating were actual celebrities. This was because THEY were the only ones showing up in the media.

Social Media has advanced to the point where it’s not only the ACTUALLY famous that you have to look out for. There are people that are said to have micro-fame or are called “internet famous”…

If you enjoy anonymity, it used to be that the only people you had to worry about dating were actual celebrities. This was because THEY were the only ones showing up in the media. The paparazzi get paid to chase them all over creation, taking pictures of them, and then they’d end up on those dumb shows that come on after the news that scrape around for any gossip they can find about someone currently famous.

Social Media has advanced to the point where it’s not only the ACTUALLY famous that you have to look out for. There are people that are said to have micro-fame or are called “internet famous”. There are different levels of micro-fame, but the way SM works, the level doesn’t really make a difference. ALLLLLL you need is for one person to take a picture of you and place it on a site or in a feed that other people pay attention to, and you could end up in social bookmarks, reblogged, captioned… what-have-you. Continue reading “Guide To Dating The “Internet Famous””

Celebrity Crush, Part 2

In response to Got a Crush on a Celebrity…, Derek writes:

So it’s an uphill climb. Understood. But, there are guys out there that KNOW (think) that they are MORE than enough to take the challenge (think Pros vs Joes).

What kinda advice would the DG give to those guys? Would could a guy do once he’s left his life, moved to the city of his desire?

I’ll met enough people to understand your initial answer all too well (think “astronaunts”). A type-A personality guy (definitely NOT me) wouldn’t let something like reality stand in the way. They are the same guys that blow horns and give cat calls to pick up women (see my last video posting – I don’t know how to link it here).

Actually, this is something else I’ve never thought about because up until recently, all the stars were in LA/Hollywood. Unless you lived out there, AND were running in their circles, there was ZERO percent chance that you’d meet a star anyway, unless she came to your local mall to sign autographs or was doing a show in your town.

In the case of doing a show, you’re done. She’s there for business, and you’re not getting near her. If she’s there for a book signing or whatever celebrities do to meet their fans, you’re not going to have but about a minute near her so your best bet is to come in the door looking jiggy-fresh, slide her your number and tell her to call you… outside of the earshot of cockblocking assistants and managers, of course.

Anyway, at this point, now that there are internet celebrities, they’re way more accessible to average joes, because none of this is being done in studios under locked-down conditions. Consider YouTube, for instance, you have some of the most REGULAR chicks that are STARS on YouTube. They probably work as cashiers in the local Wal-Mart, even.

As far as actually getting on, there’s no specific formula to that, because as predictable as chicks are, they all get off on different things. Some chicks like bad boys, some chicks like nice guys… Play the wrong style and you lose. 🙂 The only advantage you have in these situations is if the chick puts a lot of information online about things that she likes. That way, you can play it off like you’re interested in the same things and gain rapport.

So it’s not really different from the basic formula…

Gather information, then Fake It, Till You Make It! 😀

Got a Crush on a Celebrity…

Reader Derek writes:

There are people out in the public eye that grabs your attention.

Using the “Dating Genius” tried and proven methods, how can someone make any good of this? Generically and academically speaking, mind you.

Actually, this is a very good question, Derek.

Becoming enamored with public figures happens to people all day, every day. That’s why the tabloids make so much money. Everyone’s interested in what their favorite celebrities are doing and saying as well as whom they’re currently dating.

There are two ‘problems’ with this. The first one is that you’re not getting the full experience of a person by watching their show. The second is that you usually don’t have any local access to the person in question, so you never get to experience what they’re really like.

Because of this, what people ‘fall in love’ with is only 1% of the actual person at best… unless they’re doing a personal videoblog where they’re authentically telling you about themselves, their lives, what they think and feel.

For example… I have a friend that’s very PHYSICALLY attractive… very beautiful, but her personality is so *CRASS* that I can’t imagine anyone wanting to date her for who she is as a person. Guys put up with her shenanigans because she’s an easy lay. Other than that, she doesn’t have any wins… None of them are actually “WITH” her. You could take that chick and make her the host of a television show or internet show, and guys would be ‘falling in love’ with her too, but that’s because she’d be reading a script and her true personality wouldn’t be revealed at all by what she’s saying.

There’s actually a third ‘problem’ with celebrity crushes… You’re not the only one.

Depending on your level of taste in women, there could be easily 100, 1,000 or 1,000,000 guys that ‘fell in love’ with her for the exact same reasons that you did, so even if she’s available and you have local access to her, it’s gonna be an uphill climb to get on.


Friends, Acquaintances & Contacts

Kristen “Kroosh” Crusius wrote a post the other day about what’s going on in her “Friendiverse”… her universe of friends. Her post reminded me that I had intended to comment about Robert Scoble‘s videos about how social networks’ “friends lists” really work.

Part I of Social Graph Based Search. 14:41 minutes.

Part II of Social Graph Based Search. 15 minutes.

And a bonus round III. 6 minutes.

I didn’t get around to writing that post because I’ve been incredibly busy for the last two months.

I think the term “Friends”, as automatically used by several social sites is an unfortunate and misleading label. This is especially true when there are no other choices. You’re forced into a binary system…. Accept or Decline… Yes or No… 1 or 0… My-Friend or Not-My-Friend. Unfortunately, as Scoble pointed out in his videos, reality doesn’t work like that. There are different levels and flavors of relationships between people. Business relationships, Family relationships, Intimate relationships, Adversarial relationships… I think linkedin has it right with the generic term “contact”. How many ‘contacts’ do you have? They’re not (your friends) by default, nor are they (not your friends) by default. Still, in linkedin, there are several types of business relationships, including people that you have worked with personally… people you have not worked with personally, but you trust whomever recommended them to you… people you have not worked with and you have no professional recommendations for, but you vouch for them as a person, so you are happy to recommend them to someone who’s looking to fill a position…. people you have no intention of recommending to anyone, but you will still accept them as a contact… people that you are in contact with specifically so you can set them up with other people….. ALL of these are thrown in together under the title ‘contact’.

Because of the misnomer “friends”, some people have selected this to mean their ACTUAL friends and will only add people that they actually know. Here, I agree with Scoble’s assertion that this is an incorrect usage of social networks. How are you supposed to expand your circle of CONTACTS or “sphere of influence” if you limit yourself on the internet to only the people you know IRL? How are you supposed to learn about new people that might have similar interests or ideals if you deny them connection to you? What’s the point of being on a social site if you’re only going to get in touch with the same people you’re already in contact with? I think that if they had levels of acquaintance on these sites, a lot more people would be connected to each other, because the categories would make sense to them. You would be able to see at-a-glance what level each person had placed their contacts on, and make a better assessment of their actual interaction with each other.

Looking at it from the other direction… It’s not fair that someone that sends you a friends request out of the blue has the exact same status as someone you collaborate with or work with or highly respect or go out for drinks with or climb mountains and eat pancakes with. Both the random person and the IRL friend are marked down as “Friend”. There’s no meritocracy. Even with facebook‘s relationship qualifiers, that’s a SECONDARY trait. It’s like having everyone in your military with the rank of ‘Private’, and you have to go to each Private and ask them what their actual importance is in order to determine who out-ranks whom. No. It doesn’t work like that. You can tell from the bars or whatever emblem on their shoulders who’s running the show and who’s going to be digging the trenches.

In the absence of actual distinctions, I think the best approach to accepting/rejecting social site “friends” is innocent until proven guilty, not the other way around. It’s always a good thing when you can see the applicant’s friends list in order to tell who might know them that YOU know and whose judgement you trust. When I know certain people don’t like jerks, and those people are “friends” with someone, I’m more likely to take my ACTUAL friend’s word that this other person is cool. That would seem to go against what I was saying earlier, because what if my friend is using the same “innocent until proven guilty” style that I am? 🙂 I would be accepting an untested “friend”. However, checks & balances will come into play. If the untested person actually interacts with the community, they’ll start getting “reviews” which will help you decide whether you want to keep them as a friend or not. Ultimately, the circle polices itself.

I was thinking about Kroosh’s “Friendiverse” yesterday, while I was watching Drew‘s live stream from PodCamp Philly. It’s a much more intimate format… giving personal, “hand-written” recommendations of places to go, people to see and things to do. I saw many people from MY Friendiverse on Drew’s stream yesterday… Kathryn, Eric, Jackson, Jonny, Steve, Grace, Charles… and ran into others in the text chat who were also watching the stream.

Ultimately, I’ve been inspired to focus more time & energy on the upper echelon of my own personal Friendiverse. In the game called “keeping up with the net”, it’s very easy to miss out on telling the people that matter to you how cool you think they are. 🙂

Bill Cammack • New York City • Freelance Video Editor •

“Cab Game”

Living in New York City has tons of privileges. One of those is that you can ALWAYS get a cab! 😀

It’s not like the sticks, where you have to call for a cab or else you never get to leave where you are. :/ Also, you can go to a bar and drink your ass off, then stumble to the subway, a bus or a cab and arrive safely at your apartment… Whereas if you live in the sticks, that means you DROVE to the bar, and you might need to park in the Dairy Queen parking lot and sleep it off before you get on the road….. IF you can get on the road at all because maybe your car has one of those breathalyzer joints where it won’t start if you’re over the limit, hahahaha 😀


Cabs are a tremendous luxury and you have to make sure that your cab game is tight. If you successfully avoided sitting on couches, you came off with a fine young lady from the party, bar or club. 😀 Now… I know what your cheap ass is thinking… “I’ll take her on the bus, so that way, I only spend $4 for the both of us to get back to the crib… um… unless SHE has a metrocard, too, then it’s only $2 to get her home! :D”

ok… ok……….. So that’s what *I* was thinking. :/

Anyway… Don’t take her on the bus. No. No good. 🙁 Spend the extra ducats to get your cab game on.

If you take her on the bus or the train, you’re still in public. Tons of people around. If you take her in a cab, it’s just you and her. I mean, yeah, the cabbie’s there, but he needs to concentrate on the road and making sure he turns on your street. 🙂 Never mind him. Think of the cabbie as your personal chauffeur, “Jeeves”. It’s his job to drive and It’s just you and her in the back of the cab. Also… if you can’t see HIM in the rear-view mirror… HE can’t see YOU… Capicse? 😀

If you take her on the bus or train, it’s all LIT UP and ish… Once you close the door to the cab and that little light goes out, it’s darkness, like Eddie Murphy and his brother in Hollywood! 😀 Much more mood-enhancing. Add that to the isolation and the fact that you basically have your own couch instead of sitting on a hard train bench crushed up between a couple of people that didn’t understand they weren’t slim enough to fit in that space between you and the next person… and cabs are WELL WORTH the extra ducats! 😀

So… Now that you’re in the cab, you need some basic tactics. >:)

The most important style is the “Richie Cunningham”. If you don’t know who that is, go back and watch reruns of “Happy Days”. Now… Richie was pretty much a scrub, so he was scared to press up on girls he was interested in. Because of this, he had certain tactics he would use so that he could play it off if she didn’t go for it. So, To do the “Richie Cunningham”, you’re sitting next to her on your chauffeured couch in the darkness with only the Manhattan street lights shining down on you, and you start faking like you’re tired. Yawn once or twice. Look at your watch or the clock on your phone or whatever so that she sees you’re feeling tired.

Put the phone away, then give a large !!!YAWN!!! while stretchng both arms out to the side. Make sure your arm on her side ends up BEHIND her neck instead of IN FRONT OF her face! :/ As you relax your hands from the yawn, your arm will naturally land… LIGHTLY!!! on her shoulder with your hand on the other side of her. Act surprised :O that your hand didn’t come all the way down, and look at her like “OH!… Sorry ’bout that!” and pay attention to what her face looks like. It’s either going to look like 😀 , :/ or :O .

:O = “GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF ME, CREEP!!!”, in which case it’s a good thing that you did the “Richie Cunningham” because now you can act like it was an honest mistake and remove your arm, ASAP! 😀

:/ = The female version of the “Richie Cunningham”, which is her playing it off like she didn’t notice that you just put your arm around her. This is a good thing, because SHE DEFINITELY NOTICED. The continuation of this version of the Richie is to look her in the eye and smile at her, and she should smile back at you, happy that you like her. 🙂

😀 = Her laughing at you because you were so timid and intimidated by her that you felt you needed to resort to the internationally-known “Richie Cunningham” so that you would have a back-door to exit if she didn’t like you! HAHAHAHA awwwwwwwww. 😀 This is STILL a good thing, because she’s happy that you finally let her know you were interested in her, even though she now thinks you’re scared of her, and it’s going to take you a long time to live that down and regain your pimpin’ status! 😀