Purely Looks

Reader Derek writes:

I noticed that if a pretty blonde lady says anything – anything at all – like “asdfgHJKL;”, she’s gonna get tons of replies, all in a “Wow, you are ingenious ’cause you wrote that!”

And the closer to blonde you get, the more responses you get. I’ll put money down on fact that a girl “wiith blonde hair on facing left” would get more responses than the SAME GIRL “facing left with black hair.”

I know everyone has their fans and stuff, but why does beauty get you attention like that?

Actually, it depends where you are and what you have in abundance around you.

I live in New York, so we have A LOT of naturally dark-haired women and a lot that like to dye their dark hair red. Because of that, blonde is actually a commodity. Not the blonde chicks with the brunette eyebrows, hahahahaha. Not the blonde chicks with the 3″ black roots down the middle of their domes! πŸ˜€ … ACTUAL blonde chicks.

OTOH, I have cousins that live in a different part of the USA. I went to visit them and was totally amazed with the blonde chicks they had in that area… Meanwhile, I noticed that my cousins barely looked at them AT ALL! πŸ˜€ When I inquired as to what was up, I found out that their particular area was TEEMING with blonde chicks, so what was fascinating to THEM was BRUNETTES! :O

I was like “Man… you can’t throw a ROCK in NYC without hitting several brunettes before it hits the ground!”… See, so it all depends on what you’re used to, and what you have available to you.

Similarly, I grew up around chicks with BODIES. Other guys grew up liking chicks with flat asses ‘n stuff like that. So I can look at a chick and think she has the physique of a teenage boy, and the guy standing next to me is thinking “Man! Check out how nice that chick’s ass is! :O” Eventually I got used to this, and I realize that it really is “Different Strokes for Different Folks”. πŸ˜€

As far as internet culture in particular, I’d say that you’re right, that blonde chicks get more props than brunettes. There are probably a bunch of societal reasons for this including the objectification or perhaps bimbo-fication of blonde chicks ever since television and film started being shown in color instead of black and white. From Marilyn Monroe to Anna Nicole Smith, blondes have been portrayed as the “perfect” combination of sexiness and stupidity. Easy / Quick to give it up. Fun to be with. Not smart enough to make problems. Simple-minded enough to be low maintenance. Who could ask for more? πŸ˜€

Meanwhile, brunettes are often portrayed as troublemakers, thinking too much, don’t like to follow orders, not particularly sexy… This is one of the reasons why chicks dye their hair blonde, to be more attractive to guys that have gone for this “hair color indicates something” bullshit. They get tired of their blonde girlfriends getting all the raps, so they WISELY start hooking themselves up to be more attractive and get more attention.


Take her to the Book Store!

ok… So, DatingGenius stumbled onto this great new technique for kicking it to geek-chicks! πŸ˜€ (assuming you’d want to do that in the first place)….

This chick was talking about how happy she was that she was on a date, and the guy took her to A BOOK STORE!!! :/ … Now, of course, DatingGenius thought this was a ridiculous as well as RETARDED idea, so I needed to get to the bottom of this…. hmm… does anyone know proper form for referring to one’s self in third person? It seems strange to say “HE needed to get to the bottom of this”… hmm… anyway…

Now, obviously, taking a chick to a book store doesn’t help you to get on, ASAP… which is the entire reason you took her out in the first place. If you didn’t want to tap that, you wouldn’t be on a date with her. You’d be HANGING OUT. So, since she considered herself on a date, the job of the guy was to demonstrate to her WHY she should be his girlfriend/fiancee/wife, whatever he has in mind for her. All he was expressing to her by taking her to the book store was that he DIDN’T intend to hit it anytime soon, and he’d rather read a book then try to get her alone in a bar bathroom with a couch and a lock on the door.

So we got into this conversation, and I can just see the LIGHT in her eyes while she’s talking about being in this book store, and being happy about his choice of books, because if they weren’t into reading the same kinds of things, she wouldn’t have been as interested in him, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah….. So I’m like WTF is she talking about? His choice of books? Do you even know if this guy likes chicks? Do you know if he’s going to tap it proppah? WTF difference does it make WHAT BOOKS HE READS if you’re DATING this guy, trying to find a boyfriend? :/

See, that’s what’s wrong with relationships, and that’s why the cheating and divorce rates are through the roof. People hook up for the most RETARDED reasons! πŸ˜€ … HEY! We like the same books! Let’s go out with each other! OKAYYYY! πŸ˜€ … Next thing you know, they’re calling themselves boyfriend and girlfriend, and he’s trying to screw her five times a week, and she’s trying to screw him five times A MONTH! :O

See the problem there? They didn’t check the IMPORTANT stuff before giving each other meaningless titles. That’s why taking a chick to a book store is RETARDED before hitting it, because it’s a waste of your time. You’re checking to see if y’all can be *FRIENDS*, NOT boyfriend/girlfriend.

However… hehehe Like I said, this chick was going for the okey-doke, so it occurred to DatingGenius that this was a valuable concept that needed to be explored.

As we all know, Chicks give sex to get relationships and guys give relationships to get sex. In the case of GEEK-chicks, though… they’re not thinking about the sex AT.ALL! πŸ˜€ They’re not even planning to barter it to you to get you to call them your girlfriend. See, what you have to remember about the geek chicks is that most of them grew up…… geeks. πŸ˜€ They were NOT the fashion plates. They were NOT the popular girls. They were NOT the pretty girls or the cheerleaders. They were NOT in high demand whatsoever by the male population. Therefore, by the time they get to dating age, they’re not used to being physically touched.

The reason this is important is that when they think about themselves with their hypothetical “boyfriends”, all they’re thinking about is someone to do stuff with. They have no mental concept of actually getting laid, other than by some fluke. They have no intention on “giving it up” on a regular basis, because that’s not their physical experience of life. SO… If you go out on a date, and you suddenly come to the realization that this girl is a geek, switch gears! Go into “fun stuff we can do together when we’re boyfriend/girlfriend” mode.

Take her to the book store.
Go roller blading with her.
Buy her ice cream in Central Park.
Take her to the waterfront in Brooklyn so you can see the Manhattan lights at night…

All that waste-of-time stuff that you wouldn’t actually do with a regular chick… DO IT! πŸ˜€ This way, you endear yourself to her because you socialize in the same way she does. You come off as one of those geek-guys that had the same experience of life that she did. BADA-BING, BADA-BOOM, next thing you know, you’re tapping that, and all is right with the world! πŸ˜€


Tips For The Ladies

I just became aware of a video blog that is geared towards dating tips for females. I thought I’d take this opportunity to give the ladies the only dating advice they need… and here it is……

Go outside.

That’s all. Go outside. Females are always going to be in demand, well… ATTRACTIVE females… because guys are always going to want to have sex with attractive girls/women. Regardless of the latest fads of metrosexuals and all this other weird stuff going on these days, a good-looking girl will NEVER go out of style.

Having said that… There are certain people you should NOT listen to when they hand out advice for women. One of these people is Oprah….

DO NOT LISTEN when Oprah says you are attractive no matter what you look like. Don’t listen. It’s not true. Nope. πŸ˜€ Go ahead and take your chances, but unless you have some kind of mental edge on the rest of the female population, you will be passed up for better-looking girls 98% of the time. It’s a fact. Live with it. πŸ™‚

If it were actually the truth that Oprah believed women were aiiite in whatever state of disrepair they allowed themselves to descend to, she wouldn’t keep dieting every so often. YA HEARD? πŸ˜€

If it’s REALLY all cool for y’all to look like “whatever’s clever”, then Oprah would weigh about 800 lbs by now and be on stage eating bon bons during the commercial breaks. It’s not the truth. Don’t go for the “okey-doke”. πŸ˜€ Stay in shape. Period.

DO NOT LISTEN when your hairdresser tells you you would look better with some form of crew-cut or weirdo hairstyle from out of a 1960s magazine about The Rolling Stones. Having the same haircut as Charlie Watts is NOT cute for a chick. Don’t do it. :/ Don’t go for the “okey-doke”.

If you want to know what looks good on a female, ask someone that likes females. Just because some magazine did an article on some artistic thing that someone did to some woman’s head, that doesn’t mean it’s going to look good on YOU, and it doesn’t mean that you’re going to get ANY RAPS until your hair grows back. πŸ™‚

DO NOT DATE *ANYONE* THAT CALLS YOU “WIFEY MATERIAL”. Don’t do it. Don’t go for the “okey-doke”. “Wifey Material” is an anomaly. It’s a term used by guys that are very familiar with NON-WIFEY MATERIAL. It means I would treat her differently than all the other chicks I run into. It does NOT mean that you’re special. It means you are perceived to be on a certain plateau. It’s YOU and the other chicks that are “wifey material”.

Material is a substance. They may as well call you “ice cream”. I like ice cream. I think ice cream is delicious. That doesn’t mean I’m going to devote myself to ONE BOX OF ICE CREAM. If I like Vanilla, for instance, that means that I’m going to like everything that qualifies to me as well-made Vanilla ice cream. I might treat that ice cream differently, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to eat Chocolate ice cream. Get it?

“Wifey Material” means you’re going to try YOUR DAMNEDEST not to get caught coming out of the next chick’s apartment. It means you’re going to hide your true nature from this chick in order to keep her around as long as possible. It’s almost better for you NOT to be “wifey material”, because you might get a more realistic representation of how the guy really is and what he thinks of you and his relationship to you.

So… To recap….. DO NOT let yourself get out of shape. DO NOT let hairstylists do weirdo things to your hair. DO NOT listen when the guy at the club @ 2am trying do do some ‘parking lot pimping’ tells you you’re the ONLY special girl he’s ever met in his try-to-get-laid-two-days-out-of-every-seven-’cause-he’s-broke-the-other-five-days dating career and that he’d like to “wife you up”.


Cruxy Presents Suzanne Vega (Virtually)

Tomorrow night, (Friday, July 13th, 7pm EST) Cruxy will host a one-of-a-kind event as Suzanne Vega returns to her avatar form for a special virtual listening party in Second Life. Vega will be celebrating the upcoming release of her new album BEAUTY & CRIME, out July 17 on Blue Note. I caught up with Jon Oakes to get the inside story. πŸ™‚

What is Cruxy?

Cruxy is a media platform that allows any digital content creator (mostly emerging filmmakers and musicians) to promote and sell their works. Here’s a simple example: You’ve shot a short film. You put it in Mp4 format and upload it to Cruxy. We create all of the thumbnails, previews and promotional widgets for you. You set a price of $1 for others to buy a download of the film. We handle taking the money from the buyers and delivering cash to you (less a small fee that we charge).

Here’s a real world example of Cruxy in action. Some folks in the Midwest have a company called ShortTrackWorld. They go (in their cool van) to lots of small car races all over the Midwest where regular folks race their super modified race cars aroundÒ€¦ you guessed it, short tracks. ShortTrackWorld films the car races and then uses a satellite link to upload the videos from the event to their Cruxy page. They sell the videos of the race event to the drivers and fans and the videos are available just hours after the race. It’s pretty cool in action. You can check out the ShortTrackWorld page on Cruxy here: www.cruxy.com/stw

Recently we’ve been more focused on helping creators get their work into virtual world environments like Second Life. We see that as the next phase and our main focus moving forward.

What is the status of Cruxy as a startup, and who is team?

We are two full timers with a coterie of supporters, contractors, advisors and well-wishers. We are financed by our personal savings accounts, some paying engagements, anxiety and sweat.

Nathan Freitas and myself, Jon Oakes, have been working together for over eight years through three different (successful!) startups. We have built a ton of different technology, products, and solutions for people ranging from the government, to major corporations, and other technology businesses, but are most excited now to be applying our skills and inspiration towards creating new economic and marketing models for creative people, as well as the entertainment industry. Through Cruxy.com, we get to work with true indie talent and give them access to our entire platform. Working with a major artist and label such as Blue Note allows us to customize aspects of our platform, and create unique solutions, which also happen to help pay the bills. Its a good setup, and allows us to see the radical changes that are happening in this business from multiple standpoints.

What’s some of the interesting technology behind Cruxy.com?

As a startup, we need to be smart about how we spend our money so we use Amazon’s S3 and EC2 services for all of our server and data delivery needs. We pay on a variable basis (we did not have to go plunk down $25k for a bunch of servers and commit to a high monthly data service fee). This is really “on demand” computing and it allows us to scale in a pay that is precisely correlated ith our traffic and demandÒ€¦ rather than investing everything in infrastructure and hoping to fill up the pipe.

We’ve built a pretty robust system for syndicating media content. We built our syndication system to use the XSPF format which gives us unlimited dynamic playlisting capabilities.

We’ve also built a “virtual world widget” which allows people to distribute their music to their avatar in Second Life. They can then stream their music into their land or venue in Second Life so others can experience their music in a totally new and social way. Rather than just have a bunch of people anonymously visit a web page and listen to your stuff, with the virtual world widgets, you can hang out in your virtual environment in Second Life while a group of people check out and discuss your work.

Besides Second Life, are there other places where creators can syndicate their media?

Cruxy supports a variety of technologies that allow any media upload to our system to be republished and indexed by almost any standards-based service on the web. We’ve got flash widgets, RSS feeds, XSPF feeds, and even some microformats support. We also recently announced our deep integration with FaceBook so creators can get their work out to their FaceBook network more easily. We expect to launch this feature in August.

Looking towards the future, we see the growth of gaming and virtual worlds as online social environments to be a huge opportunity for creative artists to gain exposure and income. We fully intend to extend the Cruxy platform into these types of spaces and economic models.

What’s the story behind tomorrow’s Second Life event with Suzanne Vega?

We have built a virtual lower east side “Ludlow Street” circa 1990 environment to promote Suzanne Vega’s new album “Beauty and Crime”, which is full of songs about various aspects of New York. Suzanne will join us (in avatar form) for a live interview and take questions from her fans. Avatars who attend will also be able to watch video of some of her recent live performances and sample her new album.

Each attendee to the event will receive a Virtual World Widget that allows them to host their own listening parties and share the music with friends in their own land or club within Second Life.

What makes this event with Suzanne Vega different from her first appearance in Second Life?

We used the new Second Life voice beta software for this event. We also built the lower east side environment where avatars can come to hang out, drive taxi cabs, talk on pay phones and spray paint on walls long after the event. This event is about more than just the event… it’s about the environment where people can come whenever they want and sample the album while experiencing the New York that so inspires the album. We’ve got graffiti by Zephyr, the prolific graffiti artist of that era and guitars by Robbie Dingo, the renowwnded Second Life designer, at a LES guitar shop.

One other thing to note is that the MTV virtual lower east side is designed for the 18 to 25 crowd that might not remember New York pre-Guiliani. We wanted to recreate more of the grunge aesthetic that we so enjoyed in our 20’s in NYC.

How big is the market for what you are doing? Breakdancers and indie musicians don’t really make much money, right?

What everyone is realizing is that there is a growing appetite for independently created media content.

Cruxy is also one of those UGC filter sites. The higher end of the UGC market puts their stuff in Cruxy. We don’t get much of the teenage car surfing or flatulence type stuff (nothing against it as aÒ€¦ socialÒ€¦ expression, but it’s not what Cruxy is about)

Thanks Jon. Good luck with Cruxy and Suzanne Vega’s event tomorrow! πŸ˜€

“Graf art building on Virtual Ludlow Street New York”
Photo Credit: Nathan Freitas

Jonathan Oakes founded and managed his first start-up, a systems integration consultancy, at 24 years old. In 1998 Oakes co-founded ThinAirApps, where he served as CEO and Chairman leading the company to a successful acquisition by Palm Inc. in 2001. Oakes spent over two years at Palm, as Senior Director managing corporate and product strategy. Oakes earned a BA in American Studies from Skidmore College and an MBA from Harvard Business School.

Over the last ten years, Nathan Freitas’ career has spanned the academic, corporate, and non-profit worlds, solving difficult problems through the thoughtful application of technology. His work has been built into Palm handhelds, on display at JavaONE and SIGGRAPH, included in Wikipedia, and covered in media ranging from Boing Boing and Slashdot, to the New York Times and Howard Rheingold’s book “Smart Mobs”. He also plays a mean double bass.

Bill Cammack Ò€’ New York City Ò€’ Freelance Video Editor Ò€’ alum.mit.edu/www/billcammack

Pretty Girls – Too Unapproachable?

Hey Derek. Thanks for the question! πŸ˜€

Yes. There’s double truth in your statement. Pretty girls are perceived to be unapproachable, AND there are lots of pretty girls without men because of this issue.

See, first of all, girls are girls. πŸ˜€ When you live somewhere like Japan, there isn’t much difference between the girls, so they all have a chance to get guys. This leads to them being more approachable because they don’t develop a perceived superiority to the other girls.

In the USA, there’s a VAST DIFFERENCE between the looks of the girls. πŸ˜€ There are a few that are really attractive and a lot that are just totally busted. πŸ˜€ What happens here is that all the guys chase after the attractive girls and give them anything they want. This goes to the attractive girls’ heads, and they get this inflated sense of self-worth…. Until they hit 19 and their bodies stop maintaining themselves on their own. When this happens, if they don’t start working out, they get out of shape and become has-beens. πŸ™‚ This is when you see the zombie-like girls that you can tell used to be fine, but now they stumble around town opening their own doors and not having anyone rap to them in the streets or try to pay for them to eat or buy clothes. πŸ˜€ They are now experiencing what life is like for most of the population, and it’s pretty depressing for them.

Until that happens, though… They’re held up as the best of the best of American society. There’s nothing better than a fine chick, so they get everything they want and everyone listens to them and wants to be their friends. Because of this, MANY fine girls get conceited. They act bitchy towards people because they know they can get away with it. This has the effect of giving fine girls a bad name. People think they’re ALL stuck up because of the ones that can’t be gracious about their God-given good looks, which are actually the luck of the draw and have nothing to do with their own actual worth, but instead is a function of their parent’s genes.

So… Guys go out to parties and meet stuck up attractive girls and get tired of getting shot down so they stop approaching fine chicks. They start sticking to the more humble, more personally attractive and still decent-looking girls. This is why you see more girls in this range married. The guys looking to get married are tired of the incessant demands of hot chicks, so when it’s time to get married, they choose someone more ‘Down To Earth’.
Reader Derek writes:


I hear that many a pretty girl are without men because they are perceived to be unapproachable. Any truth in that statement?

This is why a lot of pretty girls are without men, as you mentioned. Because they’ve been given a bad rap, everybody wants to hook up with them but nobody wants to keep them. Even if they have the sweetest personality, the guys that would be good for them are tired of dealing with women that attractive, so they have to go without. The only guys willing to kick it to them are players who know what they’re doing and enjoy the challenge. The problem with that is that these guys come in loaded for bear, and the hot chicks end up getting used and dumped.

So… What does this mean for attractive women? Y’all need to showcase your personalities AS.MUCH.AS.POSSIBLE! πŸ˜€ Let the guys know that you’re willing to hear what they have to say, and they’ll let down that shield that they built up from being rejected so many times by the upper echelon of American females. The best bet for very attractive women is to be friendly… not to EVERYBODY, but to the guys that you’d like to talk to you because they’re scared to death that you’re going to be some crabby bitch and they’re looking right past YOU at your not-as-attractive homegirl, because they figure she’ll be more friendly and likely to be good relationship material.

As for the guys… You have to realize that attractive women get a lot of stuff, but they’re also getting played left and right. Sooner or later, they get tired of that and want a “good man” to spend time with that actually likes them for who they are and not just because of their fantastic looks. Pick yourselves up after the thousandth rejection and don’t get jaded towards attractive women. Give them a chance to give YOU a chance and see where it goes from there.

Joost for Mac build pulled

The Joost for Mac build was pulled today [link: 19/02/07: Mac build pulled]. Fortunately, I already have mine. πŸ˜€

Basically, the idea behind Joost is video on demand with extras like widgets for a clock, jabber chat, chat with others on the same channel you’re watching, the ability to rate the video you’re watching, a notice board and a news ticker.

With Joost, you can select and de-select channels. I currently have 31 channels. You can add or remove them via the “Channel Catalog”. Each channel is responsible for its own programming. There are some that specialize in short videos and others that have full documentaries or films reaching 90 minutes in length or more.

You choose “My Channels”, choose a channel from the list that appears as an overlay while your current video is still running, scroll that list to a show you’d like to check out and click on it. ~5 seconds later, you’re watching something completely different.

I wasn’t too familiar with Joost (formerly named “The Venice Project”) before I received my beta-tester invite from Jay Dedman [http://jaydedman.pbwiki.com/], so I can’t review at this point whether Joost IS what it’s creators wanted it to be. I’ll have to do more research on it.

What I can say is that the response is very quick for those of you that have ADD when it comes to television. πŸ˜€ You know those people that can’t watch a television channel for more than one second before hitting the “next station” button! πŸ˜€ The current video keeps playing while you channel-surf to your heart’s content with the mostly-transparent overlay. You can change the channels you have available and browse those channels as well without leaving the current video.

You can also search for videos with key words… like “chicks” (1 entry) or “cars” (9 entries). You can then save your search as a channel. That way, you don’t have to search a bunch of channels to find car videos or you can find videos not specifically on car channels.

It remains to be seen how many channels will be available to choose from. I’ll also be interested to see how often they change the material on each channel. If you’re a television enthusiast, you’ll enjoy the flexibility and video on demand of Joost.


There’s an issue amongst the videoblogging community as far as what groups are going to be allowed to present programming carried by Joost. The way Joost is set up, it’s the perfect opportunity to present independently produced content that’s already up and running on the web to a new audience. The question is what the criteria is going to be for consideration for acceptance as a channel. From what I’ve seen so far in the beta test, shows like Zadi Diaz & Steve Woolf’s JetSet Show [http://jetsetshow.com/] or Justin Kownacki’s Something to be desired [http://somethingtobedesired.com/] would blend in seamlessly to Joost’s current offerings, either as their own channels or individual shows on a designated “independent channel”.

We’ll see how it all shakes out. πŸ™‚ Anyway… If you’re a MSM (Main Stream Media) television enthusiast, you’ll enjoy the Joost beta test, so see if you can get your hands on an invite when they open it back up! πŸ˜‰

Bill Cammack Ò€’ New York City Ò€’ Freelance Video Editor Ò€’ alum.mit.edu/www/billcammack

Digital Video Data Rate

First of all, I’d like to thank Lynne D. Johnson for the opportunity to blog as a Fast Company Expert.

There are many reasons a particular digital video might not run well, or at all, on your computer. You might not have enough processor speed. Your video card might not be able to handle the task. You may not have the necessary codec installed. If you can see and hear the video, but it doesn’t run smoothly, your best bet is to lower the data rate. It might seem that the answer lies in decreasing the frame size. A smaller video should run more smoothly than a larger video, right?

In most cases, digital video being presented on a computer or over the internet has been compressed. By definition, the video you are watching is “smaller” than the original video. It’s smaller in size (perhaps 320×240 when the original was 640×480), but it’s also smaller in file size, or the amount of space it takes up on your drive. The parameter that limits your frame size is independent of the parameter that limits your data rate. If you decrease the frame size without decreasing the data rate, you end up with a video with a smaller viewing size that takes up the exact same amount of space on your drive.

Data rate is measured in kbps (kilobits per second or thousands of bits per second). You can set a data rate limit when you compress a digital video. If you leave the frame size the same as the problematic compression attempt and decrease the data rate, you end up with a smaller file size as well as a video that demands less processing power.

Eventually, you’ll get the video down to a manageable data rate for your computer. Hopefully, the video still looks good. If it doesn’t (since there’s now much less data per second making up each frame), you have the choices of either decreasing your frame size or decreasing your frame rate to get the visual quality where you want it now that you’ve dealt with your performance issues.

Bill Cammack Ò€’ New York City Ò€’ Freelance Video Editor Ò€’ alum.mit.edu/www/billcammack