Bill Cammack » desire fulfillment

Running Dogs

Bill Cammack — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 12:16:59 +0000

My homegirl Gaby, whom I’ve known for years, remarked one day about my photo sets that she was glad to finally have seen the same girl twice in my pictures, hahaha :D

Until she said that, I really hadn’t thought about it. My life is basically spur of the moment. I never have the same day twice in a row unless I’m working for the same client two days in a row, which STILL isn’t the same day, because the video is closer to completion and in a different state today than it was yesterday. To me, it counts as the same day, because I know where I’m going and what I’m going to do before I wake up that day. Yuck. :/

Similarly, I don’t know what chick(s) I want to spend time with until I feel like spending time with them. It’s a craving, like how pregnant chicks want pickles in their ice cream. :D (Is that actually true? I think I saw that on The Flintstones one time? haha). This causes scheduling conflicts because I can’t make plans a week in advance to spend time with a gal because I don’t know if I’m going to crave her when that particular day comes around. If I’m not feelin’ her that day and I spend time with her anyway, I can’t bring my A-game to the table and honestly don’t even really care about spending time with her.

Another issue is that the only women you’re going to see me in pictures with are the ones that are involved with Social Media. It’s one thing to spend time together and a completely different thing to broadcast to the world that you’re spending time with someone. There are business-based reasons to not broadcast one’s social life and personal and social reasons to not broadcast one’s social life. Time that I spend with someone isn’t just MY business, it’s HER business as well, so even if I’d personally like to broadcast “HEY! Check me out with this chick! :D”, I’m not authorized to or interested in putting her business in the streets, so I don’t.

Too Many Women

This is New York City. You basically never see the same chick twice, unless y’all have similar travel patterns or you happen to live on the same block or work in the same building. If you live here, try it out for yourself. All this week, when you get on the train at the same time to arrive at your job at the same time every single day, look around the subway car and make a mental note of the women in the car. You can even get in the exact same CAR if you like! :D Make the same notes for the next four days of the week and you’ll notice that it’s never the same gals. Never.

Live like this long enough, and you’ll develop a “There are always more chicks just like this one” mentality. I’m not saying that’s a good thing. I’m saying that it flavors your vision and perception. Lots of guys focus the hell out of pulling ONE chick or impressing ONE chick when it’s much easier here to meet a different chick with the exact same look as the one you’re trying to impress, except she likes you more than the original one did.

My friend Corinne hilariously labeled me as “not really that selective” (hahahaha Which I’m *STILL* getting laughs off of to this day, like a full month later!), but it’s not an issue of not being selective. It’s an issue of finding the EXACT. SAME. QUALITIES in myriad females so selecting between them is just as impossible as selecting which bottle of Evian water tastes better than another bottle of Evian water. You might be able to differentiate between Poland Spring and Evian and you might even have a preference, like you’ll always select Poland Spring if you have a choice, but, sorry. Water is Water. They didn’t put different water into the different Evian bottles. They put a percentage of the exact. same. water. into each bottle.

The only actual difference between equally attractive women is their personalities.

Sometimes you want to hang out with the down-to-earth asexual chick that you know you’re going to have a pleasant evening and excellent conversations with. Sometimes you want to hang out with the alcoholic sex-addict who couldn’t come up with an interesting topic of conversation to save her life. Sometimes, you want to hang out with the world-traveler with the fantastic accent so you can listen to stories about places you never intend to visit in your entire life. Sometimes, you want to hang out with the lesbian that’s going to chase chicks harder than you do while you’re out at the bar. Sometimes you want to hang out with the artsy chick whose views are diametrically opposed to yours, but you really enjoy fighting with her and only love and cherish her MORE after your battles.

Living in a city with literally millions of women, not counting tourists that visit here every single day (and you KNOW how chicks DO when they’re on VACATION!!! ;) hehe) reduces your tolerance for corny behavior to ZERO. Hold the door for a chick and she doesn’t say “Thank You”?.. Instant write-off. She’s a Cro-Mag. Can’t be bothered. Always flakes out on hangouts? Write-off. Never there for you when you have a bad day? Write-off. Likes to use you for Social Media contacts? Write-off.

You don’t have this luxury in the sticks, because there are only a few women to choose from, so you have to basically select the lesser of the evils. You have to select the most attractive chick with the least amount of traits that you absolutely, completely detest and then live with those traits and hope beyond hope that she doesn’t pass those off to your kids with herâ€¦ HOPEFULLY *YOUR* kids! HAHAHA :D

Running Dogs

This is why I liken myself and the few like me to Running Dogs. If you happen to be there when we mosse through, you’ll probably get to enjoy the show.. We’re not stopping, though. You couldn’t stop us if you tried. Attempting to do so is dangerous.. for YOU.. emotionally… We’re on an entirely different level. We’re seeing what you’re not seeing and reacting to what you don’t even realize is reality. We’re always on our way through to somewhere else and something else to do, see and be a part of. If there’s something extraordinary about you, you’ll probably get an invite to roll with, or at least meet up with us somewhere in the future along our random travels.

It’s an addiction.. An addiction to desire fulfillment. It’s the same thing that drove Genghis Khan to keep conquering lands after he was already well accomplished, feared and respected. It’s the same thing that drives businesspeople to keep working and creating companies after they’ve already amassed more wealth than they’re ever going to spend in their entire lifetimes. It’s the rush. It’s the thrill of the hunt. It’s being in play, in the game. Striving for what you want right now is better than settling for what you were offered yesterday. Most of the time, you end up empty-handed. Some of the time, you come off with STELLAR days and evenings that make it all worthwhile and gear you up for the next quest/conquest.

This lifestyle isn’t for everyone. I hope I never forget a conversation I had with a friend of mine outside a local bar, where he told me (pardon my French, ladies) “I’m tired of hoes”. When he said it, I laughed my ass off until I realized that he was completely serious. The Game ceases to be fun if you lose the ability to appreciate women throwing sex at you because you look good and/or you have money and/or you’re popular. Sometimes, a guy wants to actually build something with a gal or start a family. You can’t do that with groupies. They’re just as much on the hunt as you are. They’re in it for the thrill of being with you like you’re in it for the thrill of being with them. No more, no less. They don’t care about you any more than you care about them. You can’t trust them any more than they can trust you.

It’s an environment conducive to producing alliances between rogue freelancers. You’re like a bunch of mercenaries that are all drinking and eating together because you’ve all been paid for by the king’s gold to work together towards a common goal. You don’t have to like each other or respect each other. You just have to do your part, have your fun and collect your payment at the endâ€¦ Assuming you’re still alive. :D

Don’t Try This At Home

This is why you probably can’t actually use ANY of my dating advice haha, there isn’t much likelihood that you and I are playing the same game.

I can do and say anything I want, because there are always more chicks. You have to be afraid of losing the one chick you have that you worked so hard to get and that you feel would be incredibly difficult if not impossible to replace.

Also, maybe you already found that one chick that floats your boat entirely, in which case, I’m very happy for you and more power TO y’all! :D It’s an incredibly excellent feeling to be a part of a greatly cohesive unit. It’s a great feeling to want to hang out with the same chick every single day. I’m not knocking that lifestyle, just trying to explain mine.

I live daily on borrowed time.. Not borrowed from myself, but borrowed from other people. I’m that guy in between relationships. I’m that vacation from their daily lives. Nobody LIVES at Disney World, you’ll notice. They get their kicks and go away. Mickey Mouse doesn’t hang out with the same people every day and neither do I.

Like I said, it’s not for the faint of heart. Some people crave stability. Some people crave reliability and reliable redundancy. Some people just don’t have the energy to hit the streets and see what they can do tonight. Some people don’t have the insane amounts of turnover that we have here in Manhattan, NYC, USA where we can go to three different bars within 200 feet of each other, meet 20 people we’ve never seen before in our lives and then do the same thing again tomorrow night.

Is it emotionally healthy? Probably not. We get what we get when and where we get it. Better that than being bored to death or spending time with someone when we really aren’t feelin’ them. I can’t possibly count how many gals I should probably have married that I let slide so they could go do that stuff with someone who actually caresâ€¦ or who’s willing to pretend that they care. Fortunately for me, I almost never feel lonely, yet I’m constantly battling boredom. I’d rather be in the game.. In the hunt.. Runningâ€¦

~ Bill Cammack | @BillCammack

Why Guys Catcall

Bill Cammack — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 17:07:05 +0000

So… A few hours ago @ Brian‘s party, The Kid made a new friend… Well… Until she actually reads my blog, hahaha :D Her name is Jess, and she blogs @ Jess and Josh Talk About Stuff.

So, naturally, this morning, the mandatory e-Stalking session was in order. :D

I immediately landed on a series of posts entitled “The Great Catcalling Experiment”, and of course, The Kid was like awwwwwww here we GO!!! :D

I thought I’d comment on some excerpts from Jess’ series…..

“Jezebel just posted an article analyzing CNN’s lovely story entitled, “Catcalls – Creepy or Complimentary?” Hey, CNN – allow me to answer that question for you, since as a PYT living in New York, I am constantly the victim of bordering-on-sexual-harassment-catcalls.”

I’ll assume that PYT stands for “Pretty, Young Thing”, derived from Michael Jackson’s record. If it’s something else, someone let me know! :D

“Not only is it creepy, but it’s objectifying and downright annoying. I have never once stopped in my tracks, looked at my perp in the eye, sincerely thanked him and then handed him my number.”

“So why do men continue to catcall?”

Personally, I don’t indulge… but I see why a lot of guys do it. We’ll get to that later. :)

I don’t bother with catcalling because a) it doesn’t work, and b) it totally goes against my personal style. If you tell a chick how fine she is the first time you ever lay eyes on her walking down the street, you already gave your entire game away. You don’t have any leverage, because she knows you’re sweating her. It’s a Cro-Mag move, and really base… simplistic. If that’s how you want to present yourself to a chick you’re tryinna kick it to, be my guest. :D

Actually, I shouldn’t say it DOESN’T work… It’s actually a low-percentage play. IF the chick likes you, AND she doesn’t penalize you for your primitive tactics, you can get on. Quick & Dirty. Done Deal. If she doesn’t like you, no dice. If she liked you until you opened your mouth, no dice. What’s immediately obvious, however, is that if she likes you already, your comment to her actually did you no good. You didn’t GAIN anything by catcalling her (catcalling AT her?), and could have still pulled the digits if you hadn’t said anything at all… OR if you had said something decent or respectful, such as “hello”.

“Is it in their genes? Is it a cultural thing, since many of the men who vocalize appreciation for my “beauty” tend to be Hispanic and African American? (Though, yeah, some are white – and many of them are asshole Wall Street guys).”

hehehe This is a good question. Having met Jess in person, her results are going to be skewed because of her body type. In General, hispanic and black guys are going to be more physically attracted to her and white guys are going to be less physically attracted to her.

Having said that, I think that guys, black, white or otherwise will be more apt to catcall if they’ve experienced success with that tactic in the past, so I think it’s less “cultural” and more “situational”. Also, a lot of the white guys in NYC are imports. They’re not FROM NYC. They’re not used to walking past 8 or 9 girls on one block that they’d hook up with, so they never developed any street game. Some guys don’t even feel like talking to chicks in the street is appropriate at all. :D

“It’s a feminist issue, but it’s also a human issue. Why have so many women simply accepted this kind of harassment as part of the female job description?”

Partially, because women can’t win this situation. If you keep walking, he “wins”, or at least, he didn’t lose anything, because you would have kept walking anyway if he hadn’t tried to “throw his hat in the ring” (unless you were into him until he catcalled, as I explained earlier). If you stop and talk to him, he wins. That’s what he wanted. Even if you react negatively towards him, he’s still getting your time and attention and he doesn’t care what you think anyway, so all you’re doing by talking to him is giving him a chance to try to get on.

Of course, I’m talking about non-workplace situations.

“It doesn’t matter what I’m wearing, either. I’ve been hit on on my way home from the gym, red-faced, pony-tailed, wearing sweats and coated in a sheet of sweat (er, excuse me – glistening).”

Already covered => “Does it matter what women think?”. Basically, what you think of YOUR looks / attire has ZERO bearing on HIS interest in you. Also, your lack of indication that you want him (or anyone) to talk to you is completely irrelevant.

The entire point is Desire Fulfillment. His.

“This initial graph shows that the majority of men actually did want to pursue something with me beyond catcalling, which was… unexpected, especially considering it’s strange that they would use such a relatively offensive method of catching my attention if they actually wanted to go on a date with me. Or maybe they were caught off guard since I’m sure they never get a positive response from the women they verbally harass. Upon approaching them, they appeared rather flustered but still semi-confident. I gave them each fake phone numbers. Sorry, boys.”

This is why I mentioned success rates and “street game” earlier. Catcalling isn’t a “Never” proposition… it’s only “Low Percentage”. You can definitely get on with catcalling, and there are guys that do it all the time, I’m sure. My point earlier was that they don’t actually NEED to catcall, because the only reason they’d be successful is if the chick was already attracted to them.

The fact remains that there are gals that respond to catcalling AND will give it up relatively quickly thereafter…. um…. actually, that’s probably one of the benefits, hahaha. If you can pick her up by yelling at her in the street, she should be an easy lay. It’s kind of like a poor way to weed out chicks that you might have to put in some work to get. :)

“Woo! I don’t know if it’s the impending heatwave or the fact that I’m wearing a belted t-shirt as a dress, but every construction worker and his brother-in-law wanted to bang this hot mami this morning. Or, so they verbalized.”

“An anonymous commenter brought up the excellent point that just because the men positively embrace my response to their jeers, it does not mean they want to date me. Instead, it probably means they just want to fuck me.”

The difference being……..?

“So now we will operate under the premise that when they ask for my phone number they are simply trying to get in my pants.”

ummm….. Of Course. That’s all that’s going on. Guys are taking shots in the dark at getting laid.

There’s an endless supply of chicks in this town. By one report, there are 210,820 excess single women in NYC. This means that when it comes to kicking game, women are completely expendable. You can ruin a rap to 50 chicks every single day and NEVER run out of chicks to meet in this town that have never seen you before in their lives. I met Jess approximately 12 hours ago, read her blog this morning and blogged about it this afternoon. I met chicks the day before yesterday, and I’m going to meet more today. :D

The point is that catcalling is a last ditch effort, even if a lot of guys use it as their first attempt at kicking it to a chick. It’s low percentage, but it doesn’t matter if you burn that bridge. There are another couple of hundred thousand chicks to try to get on with before the end of the construction day.

“… If any fellow catcallers and readers of Jess and Josh want to take on this task and report back, we would be very grateful. Otherwise, I guess we’ll all have to keep on wondering… why men do the things they do zomg lolz.”

I think by now, I’ve gone over the basic points. When it comes to trying to get laid in a city with an endless supply of females, taking shots in the dark is a low-percentage play that MIGHT score you a chick that will give it up quick. Even if she hates you after the fact, it’s irrelevant, because there are another 210,000 of her that you haven’t offended yet. On top of that, there are women that will take ANY showing of attention from a guy as a compliment, due to an extreme lack of self-esteem. With so many extra females, every so often, you’re bound to run into one that’s tired of not getting some herself, and is susceptible to hooking up with some guy that catcalled her for her own personal pleasure.

As far as “dating”… Dating is just setting up opportunities to get laid, so we end up back at the nitty-gritty. He doesn’t care what you say. He doesn’t care what you think. He DOES care what you look like and that he’s physically turned on by you, and decides to utilize his primitive skillz to try to pick up women on the fly.

It doesn’t matter that you’re dressed in sweats and a hoodie. It doesn’t matter that you didn’t look at him or say anything to him to indicate that you wanted to be rapped to……

Having said all that… :D

I was chatting with Lux earlier, and her take is that catcalling isn’t really about sex… it’s about power.

That’s a discussion for another day. All I can express is the point of view of someone that knows professional catcallers and has the opportunity to catcall chicks every day. I opt out, because it’s low-percentage as well as low-brow. Catcalling usually indicates either desperation or disrespect. Neither one is good. :D

There are classier ways to throw your hat in the ring when you’re crossing a woman’s path that you’ll never see again in this city of millions.

Step your games up, Playboys! :D

Individual links:
Boys Will Be Boys, and So Their Balls May Suffer the Conseq…
The Great Catcalling Experiment: Day One
The Great Catcalling Experiment: Day Two
The Great Catcalling Experiment: Day Three, Uptown Version

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