Advantages of Celibacy (not having sex)

According to Webster’s, “Celibacy” is either 1) the state of not being married, or 2) abstention from sexual intercourse (read: not having sex).

I don’t know what works in the sticks, but here in NYC, people avoid sex by buying dogs. The dog becomes the central figure in the relationship and as long as HE pets the dog and then SHE pets the dog, the “love” is transferred throughout the entire “family” without him actually having to waste time having sex with her when he could be working on his startup.

So here are some of the advantages of celibacy:

Kung Fu Proficiency

Regardless of how long you study the I-Ching Manual, you’ll never attain the highest level of kung fu proficiency unless you’re celibate.

You can get close, but if someone’s received the same training you have, yet has kept himself “pure”, he’s always going to be the stronger of the two of you when it comes down to that all-important last fight in the movie.

Many men with aspirations to take over the world (or, at least China) have been thwarted by this lack of dedication to kung fu and wanton disregard for its rules. Don’t let this happen to you. Be a champion! Lay off the chicks!


Until they invent airborne STDs, remaining celibate will protect you from viruses… like buying a Mac. Continue reading “Advantages of Celibacy (not having sex)”

Time, Part 03: “Office Hours”

Continued from “Time, Business & Handouts [Time, Part 1]” and “Time, Part 02”

Liz Copic & Bill CammackOne of the by-products of this startup culture we live in is that people don’t know when to buzz the %*^& off.

I know this because I’ve been living that lifestyle for a couple of years now. The only thing that matters is that the job isn’t finished yet. Whatever you have to do to finish it and however long it takes, that’s what you need (and to a masochistic degree, WANT) to do.

No. I do not want to go out for a drink with you. I want to implement a new feature on my site. Going out with you is a waste of my time, *AND* it’s just pushing me further back in finishing the project that’s bringing me an actual ROI in the future.

The other day, I was awake @ 3 am and I thought about something I needed to talk to some company about. I looked their number up on the web and called them. I was actually ANNOYED at the fact that I was going to have to wait until maybe 7 am to speak to them! hahaha THE NERVE!!!

That’s the life we live. “There are four hours until I can do what I want to do”, as opposed to “You know what? Just because I’m awake and functional doesn’t mean anybody else IS or NEEDS TO BE”.

Social Media

All this connectivity makes it even worse. There are too many ways for people to monitor your online presence and think they have an opportunity to grab at your time. You ignore their phone calls and they text you. You ignore their texts and they email you. You ignore their emails and they call your other phone. You ignore their voicemail and the look for you on Facebook… or MySpace or AIM/iChat or Twitter or Pownce or Jaiku or on your website or in Ning communities or in forums or bulletin boards…….

It would be laughable if it weren’t so utterly pathetic. 🙂 It’s like they’re going “How dare he post on Twitter when he didn’t return any of my calls? :O” “How dare he go out partying and post 35 pictures on the net when my project deadline is coming up? :O” Well… That’s just the thing. It’s *YOUR* deadline until you pay me to make it MY business at all. MY job is to have a good time. Period. If I elect to stop having a good time and help you accomplish YOUR goals in return for some of your money, then that’s business. Other than that, anything I tell you that helps you out is. a. FAVOR.

Another thing about this is that just because you see me on Twitter @ 4 am, that doesn’t mean I’m interested in or willing to discuss ANYTHING about your business with you. This isn’t the help desk. This isn’t live customer support from India. If I can help out and choose to, good for you. If I choose not to, that’s how it went. Continue reading “Time, Part 03: “Office Hours””