Bill Cammack » relationship

Men Buy Sex

Bill Cammack — Tue, 22 May 2012 10:09:10 +0000

Here we go again. :/

HuffPo announced yesterday that more dudes are being investigated for “misconduct” because of their interactions with hookers.

First of all, that’s not “misconduct”. That’s “conduct”.

Men buy sex. Get over it.

Here’s what the article says -> huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/21/dea-cartagena-prostitution-secret-service_n_1534719.html

DEA Cartagena Probe: Agency Embroiled In Prostitution Scandal

WASHINGTON — The Justice Department inspector general’s office was investigating possible misconduct by two or more Drug Enforcement Administration agents in Colombia unrelated to the Secret Service incident with prostitutes at a Cartagena hotel, federal officials said Monday.

The probe began based on information provided by the Secret Service, the DEA said. The agency is making its employees available to be interviewed by investigators with the office of the Justice Department inspector general, the DEA said.

Here’s the deal… Men want women. Women want money. Men are willing to hand over money to women in order to speed up the process of getting them to spread their legs (or whatever).

Not everybody can walk into a bar and attract a woman. Some guys need to pay women to give it up. This will never change. There’s nothing to be surprised about.

Guys aren’t interested in croaking without having an exciting sex life. For that, you can stay broke (poor). There’s no reason to make money other than to attract better-quality women. If you can attract hawter chickz without making money at all, there’s no reason to do it.

(See: Artists and Rock Stars)

When a guy meets a gal in a bar, he’s not *ACTUALLY* interested in talking to her, because nobody cares how her day was or what she does for a living. He’s trying to get to the nitty-gritty and hook up with her, ASAP.

If he could do it RIGHT NOW, he would. Money tends to speed up the process of getting laid, whether that involves buying Porsches, fancy apartments, clothes, dinners, or drinks.

If “Nice shoes, let’s **** >:D” actually worked for dudes, that’s all they’d ever say to women.

This is why it’s continuously pathetic to read about this and that “scandal” that isn’t actually a scandal.

Reporting that dudes patronize hookers is like reporting that fish live in water… *NOT* like reporting that fish live OUTSIDE of water… Ain’t No Mystery.

ummmm… On top of all that.. Prostitution in Colombia is… *LEGAL*

wikipedia.org/wiki/Prostitution_in_Colombia

Prostitution in Colombia is legal as long as it is done in designated “tolerance zones”. [1]

Prostitution is widespread, partly due to poverty and internal displacement.[citation needed] Domestically, organized crime networks, some related to illegal armed groups, are responsible for human trafficking for sexual slavery and the armed conflict has made a large number of internal trafficking victims vulnerable.[1]

So these dudes aren’t even breaking any laws. They’re participating in, let’s call it, accelerated access to females.

If these dudes could actually pull women from how they looked or their gift of gab, nobody could say JACK to them for getting laid.. Remember “.. and the pursuit of happiness”? >:D

That’s not the real problem, though. The real problem is that people like to *FRONT* like they’re not doing things they’re obviously doing.

I’ve been saying, literally for YEARS, already, that there’s a reason why Monica was under the desk.

*SOMEBODY* has got to be under the desk.

Other than that, you can stay broke. There’s no point in having a career, or even a job, if you’re getting the same thing or less than a homeless dude.

However.. People like to front as if this isn’t the case. People like to pretend that if dudes go to countries where FOYINE chicks will give them some for a few pesos or whatever that they’re not going to JUMP at the chance.

It’s just not true. Get over it.

Men Buy Sex.

Women Sell Sex.

The sooner you realize this fact of life, the less you’ll be shocked by these so-called headlines about guys paying women for accelerated sexual access.
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How To Approach Women

Bill Cammack — Tue, 15 May 2012 09:51:54 +0000

Reader “Grace” asked me what my technique was for approaching women. I gave her the short answer to her question, but wasn’t able to elaborate, because I was responding on my Facebook page and not my blog, where I can go on and on about this stuff, ad infinitum.

Who Made Who?

Life is different for guys that women actually like and/or are attracted to.

This is why my blog posts about dating describe general circumstances that occur for and to common people.

It wouldn’t do you any good for me to tell you my technique for doing something, because it only works for me and people similar to me… It’s not something I’m doing, it’s the medium or environment surrounding me that makes anything work or not work for me.

For example, I’m highly educated (alum.MIT.edu/www/billcammack), so even if I know what the current slang words mean, they sound completely different when I’m saying them, compared to someone that actually lives life “in the street”.

This automatically works to my advantage or disadvantage, depending on what turns the chick on.

If she’s used to regular “around the way” guys, I will be weighed, measured and found wanting (“A Knight’s Tale” -> imdb.com/title/tt0183790/quotes?qt=qt0439577).

LL: “Around The Way Girls” -> youtu.be/hdzU3tXXd8Q

If she’s *TIRED* of “around the way” guys, I automatically skyrocket in value to her, simply by saying “Excuse me, :) Could you pass me the mustard?”, because my vibe and the way I naturally relate to her, even if I’ve never met her before in life, is completely different from what she’s used to.

(Which doesn’t mean better or worse… Just different.)

So it isn’t what I said that attracted her, but rather WHO I AM, which is a representation of the sum of my personal experiences in dating in particular and relating to people in general.

I can’t say, as a valid technique to get girls “Say ‘Excuse me, :) Could you pass me the mustard?’ instead of ‘Yo.. Lemme get that? o_O’”, because you’re still the same person, saying different words. All that’s going to do is make you look inauthentic and like you’re trying too hard.

Sure, you should be courteous, but only if you actually *FEEL* courteous.

Also, like I said above.. Depending on the female, saying “Yo.. Lemme get that? o_O” might be your Golden Ticket to pulling her! :D hahaha

Presentation

So, to respond fully to Grace’s question..

I meet new women IRL every week… Which is part of the “problem” with retiring from the game, but I’ll get to that later.

I don’t have a “technique” for kickin’ it to them, other than being a guy they want to hook up with, or hang out with, or talk to, or meet, or whatever they want.

So, my “game” starts before I walk out the door.

Every time I’m in public, my appearance expresses something about how I feel about myself and/or how I feel about the people I’m going to be around.

This is why I advocate to chicks to stop going outside looking like bums -> billcammack.com/2010/06/28/bill-dating-tips-women-part-01/.

Nobody wants to kick it to a chick that doesn’t care about her own personal appearance, whether that’s the clothes she selects or her physical state of disrepair.

Similarly, for guys, we win or lose the rap *BEFORE* we see the woman we want to kick it to, or, more accurately, before SHE sees US.

My job is to make sure I’m in good physical shape, and my presentation is proper for how I currently feel, so that when she sees me, she feels something that piques her interest in me.

So, Similar to my vernacular, this is a “hit or miss” proposition.

If I’m heading to see a punk rock band and run into a chick that likes country club type dudes, I’m pretty much short.

If I’m heading to a NYC Nightlife event, and run into a chick that likes grungy dudes, I’m pretty much short.

So, That’s the long way of explaining to Grace that I don’t use a technique to rap to women, in the direct sense of the term… I don’t use gimmicks and lines… I decide on my presentation, based on how I feel, then I gauge women’s reactions to being around me.

The ones that I receive the “I’d like to meet you” vibe and/or eye contact from receive returned eye contact, a nod, and maybe a smile, depending on how I’m feeling about myself that day. haha I might not be in a smileish mood.

First Impressions

The point is that I don’t run around in the street chasing women, because I don’t have to.

Other guys make things very simple for me by chronically FAILING to maintain their looks and physiques.

By the time I roll up, there’s a selection of women that are like “Who’s That? >:D”, and I decide which one(s) I want to meet from the pool of the women who are already interested in me before I say word 1 to them.

So.. The trick to approaching women is being the type of guy they’d like to meet.

Women only take a few seconds to decide whether they’d like to hook up with you or not.. physically.. I mean it’s a physical, chemical reaction to you that they experience… How long it takes them to actually give it up is an entirely different story! :D haha

But my point is that they know off that bat whether they want to give you some or not. All this talking and pickup lines and taking them out to dinner and other nonsense only has a small percentage effect on her behavior, compared to her first impression of you, and whether she feels a spark of energy or not.

If she’s not feelin’ you and you take her to dinner and the movies, you’re still not getting any! :D

If she *IS* feelin’ you, and you *DON’T* take her to dinner and the movies, you can still get on.

At least in a major city like NYC, it’s a waste of your time to try to convince some chick that isn’t sexually attracted to you to hook up with you.

There are too many women here. Keep it movin’, and kick it to a chick that already likes what you’re offering.

It’s much faster to find a new chick than to change the current one’s mind.

Even if you successfully woo her, it’s only a temporary fix. You’re still better off finding a chick that likes you for who you already are than trying to maintain a relationship with some gal you have to continually persuade to be interested in you.

So, Anyway… Approach women *BEFORE* you approach women.

You’ll be assessed practically instantaneously when she first becomes aware of you.

If you don’t see her seeing you for the first time, you’ll miss critically important information that should dictate how you interact with her, going forward.

Boys’ Club of America

Bill Cammack — Thu, 19 Apr 2012 08:54:30 +0000

Everybody knows that there are distinct and clear advantages to being a dude.

Two days ago, The USA just celebrated Equal Pay Day, for instance:

pay-equity.org/day.html

The next Equal Pay Day is Tuesday, April 17, 2012. This date symbolizes how far into 2012 women must work to earn what men earned in 2011.

Equal Pay Day was originated by the National Committee on Pay Equity (NCPE) in 1996 as a public awareness event to illustrate the gap between men’s and women’s wages.

Since Census statistics showing the latest wage figures will not be available until late August or September, NCPE leadership decided years ago to select a Tuesday in April as Equal Pay Day. (Tuesday was selected to represent how far into the work week women must work to earn what men earned the previous week.) The date also is selected to avoid avoid religious holidays and other significant events.

Because women earn less, on average, than men, they must work longer for the same amount of pay. The wage gap is even greater for most women of color.

So, off the bat, I can do the same job a woman does, for the exact same amount of time, and get paid more for it.

Keep Your Legs Closed

Recently, there have been an alarming (to me) number of situations that have been spilling the beans about the Boys’ Club to the international press.

Check out this Herb, talking to Andrea Mitchell:

YouTube Link => youtu.be/ZM6ifRq_SNg

For some reason, he felt perfectly comfortable telling a joke that you tell TO GUYS, *ABOUT* women, TO A WOMAN, on NATIONAL TELEVISION = International YouTube.

I mean, I understand that dude is a billionaire, so he doesn’t give a flying **** what women think, but C’Mon, Sunn! :/

He-Man Woman Haters Club

Next up, we have this club that’s still discriminating against people in the year 2012.

I thought this was pretty fantastic, because I thought that had been over for years, but NOPE! :D

csmonitor.com/USA/Sports/2012/0405/All-male-Augusta-National-overlooks-Virginia-Rometty.-Should-IBM-complain

Behind the scenes at this year’s Masters golf tournament is a matchup that many are watching almost as much as Tiger Woods versus the rest of the field.

The matchup is between the men-only Augusta National Golf Club – where the tournament has been played since 1933 – and critics who have been calling for a female member, particularly since 2002, when feminist Martha Burk took on the club.

The new wrinkle is that Augusta has traditionally extended membership to the CEOs of its corporate sponsors. Now, one of those sponsors, IBM, has a female CEO – one who even plays golf.

It’s an awkward moment for IBM and CEO Virginia “Ginni” Rometty as they consider what – if anything – to do about the apparent snub. Fighting the feminist cause might not be IBM’s job, say some experts, but the company might have to brace for a potential backlash if it continues its relationship with Augusta.

I personally don’t hang out with groups of dudes and no chicks, so I can’t even venture a GUESS at what their benefit is of not allowing female members.

You Mean That Wasn’t Free?

Our latest spillage of thine beans is that a bunch of dudes went to some foreign country and bought sex from a bunch of chicks, but one idiot didn’t feel like paying for it, so a bunch of them got in trouble, and already, three of them have lost their jobs:

nytimes.com/2012/04/19/world/americas/colombian-escort-speaks-about-secret-service-scandal.html

CARTAGENA, Colombia — A Secret Service agent preparing for President Obama’s arrival at an international summit meeting and a single mother from Colombia who makes a living as a high-priced escort faced off in a room at the Hotel Caribe a week ago over how much he owed her for the previous night’s intercourse. “I tell him, ‘Baby, my cash money,’ ” the woman said in her first public comments on a dispute that would soon spiral into a full-blown scandal.

The disagreement over her price — he offered $30 for services she thought they had agreed were worth more than 25 times that — set off a tense early morning quarrel in the hallway of the luxury hotel involving the woman, another prostitute, Colombian police officers arguing on the women’s behalf and American federal agents who tried but failed to keep the matter from escalating.

On Wednesday, in a setback to the reputation of those who protect the president, the Secret Service prepared to fire one supervisor tied to the alleged misconduct with prostitutes on the Cartagena trip, the agency said in a statement. Another supervisor has decided to retire, and a third employee will be allowed to resign, the statement said. Eight other employees remain under investigation.

“These guys have the clearest cases,” said a government official briefed on the investigation, referring to the three who are being pushed out.

The employees under scrutiny have been asked to take lie detector tests; only one has agreed to do so, the official said. The supervisor who is being fired has threatened to sue, Mark Sullivan, the director of the Secret Service, has told officials.

Now.. This situation is very funny. :D

It’s funny because even though men know that men buy sex every day of life, they can’t admit that they know this or they would be spilling the beans about the Boys’ Club.

Basically, the rules are “Do whatever you want, until you get caught, and then we’re all going to act like y’all are renegade anomalies and we’re nothing like you.”

Personally, I have nothing to do with prostitutes and never have.

This has nothing to do with ethics.

I think that if a chick feels like selling ass and a dude is willing to buy it, that’s good for them, and I hope they enjoy themselves and have fun stories to tell after the fact.

For me, women actually like me, so I don’t have to pay women for sex, never have, and probably never will.

Paying a chick for sex would be like paying her to mop the floor = not erotic.

Since the only reason you’re talking to her is to eventually engage in some sort of erotic episode with her, it’s best that you don’t do (no pun intended) anti-climactic things with her, such as negotiate with her for how much money you’re going to owe her for spreading her legs or opening her mouth.

*YAWN*

So, I have nothing against dudes that actually get something out of buying hookers, but if that’s how you’re going to live your life, remember to *PAY* after you *PLAY*.

If dude would have just paid this chick what she says they agreed to (he says he was drunk when they negotiated the price, which is *HIS* problem, not hers), none of these dudes would have gotten in trouble and/or fired.

Unfortunately for him, she saw herself as a high-priced “Escort”, and he saw her as a foreign whore, so there was no way he was upping American Escort money to a Colombian Hooker.

nytimes.com/2012/04/19/world/americas/colombian-escort-speaks-about-secret-service-scandal.html

There was a language gap between the woman, 24, who declined to give her full name, and the American man who sat beside her at the bar and eventually invited her to his room. She agreed, stopped on the way to buy condoms but told him he would have to give her a gift. He asked how much. Not knowing he worked for Mr. Obama but figuring he was a well-heeled foreigner, she said, she told him $800.

The price alone, she said, indicates she is an escort, not a prostitute. “You have higher rank,” she said. “An escort is someone who a man can take out to dinner. She can dress nicely, wear nice makeup, speak and act like a lady. That’s me.”

By 6:30 the next morning, after being awoken by a telephone call from the hotel front desk reminding her that, under the hotel’s rules for prostitutes, she had to leave, whatever deal the two had agreed on had broken down. She recalled that the man told her he had been drunk when they discussed the price. He countered with an offer of 50,000 pesos, the equivalent of about $30.

Disgusted with such a low amount, she pressed the matter. He became angry, ordered her out of the room and called her an expletive, she said.

She said she was crying and went across the hall, where another escort had spent the night with an American man from the same group. Both women began trying to get the money.

The other funny thing about this is that prostitution is legal where this occurred, so instead of the hooker being SOL, she actually *COULD* step to the cops and tell them that this gringo refused to pay for the sex he already got and had agreed to a price for.

She ended up settling for $250, which is way less than she wanted, and way more than he had originally offered, but the damage was already done by then.

Baby, My Cash Money! :O

oh.. wait… Here’s another account, from the Daily News! :D

nydailynews.com/news/national/colombian-hooker-center-secret-service-scandal-fight-800-agent-promised-article-1.1063676

Rep. Peter King (R-L.I.) said the agent who was fired is fighting his dismissal. “He’s suing the agency and fighting to stay,” he said.

King did not know if that agent was the one who kicked off the brouhaha by stiffing one of the 20 hookers hired by the frolicking G-men.

Eight other Secret Service operatives remain on administrative leave. Their security clearances have been stripped.

The call girl at the heart of the scandal is a dark-haired stunner who goes by the name Tania and was humiliated when an agent gave her only $28 for the night, according to the cabbie who drove her home.

“He only gave her 50,000 pesos ($28) for a cab ride, because he thought he had already paid her,” Jose Pena told The News.

She told Pena, “This never happened to me before. I feel so embarrassed.”

Pena said the raven-haired 5’-4” escort was one of a group of girls the agents picked up very late at a club and took back to the Hotel Caribe — but not before she stopped to buy condoms.

The agents have told investigators they didn’t realize the scantily clad ladies lavishing attention on them were prostitutes until it was too late.

“Most of them said they didn’t know until they got back to their rooms that they were hookers,” a source said.

After the wild night, Tania told the cabbie her agent was still drunk in the morning, when he belligerently kicked her out of his hotel room and locked the door.

“I tell him, ‘Baby, my cash money,’” she told the New York Times.

She said she banged fruitlessly on the door and then went to another agent’s room to summon one of her friends.

A group of hookers, Secret Service agents and local cops gathered in the hotel hallway arguing as the original agent remained behind his locked door.

Eventually, the other agents gathered $225 in dollars and pesos for Tania, who agreed to leave, Pena said.

Tania is a 24-year-old single mother who takes pride in being an escort — and not a hooker.

She typically pockets $800 for a “date” – and that she had told the agent in advance that’s what she cost.

Now, the Daily News isn’t the most reliable of sources, haha but you get the picture.

What do you mean “You didn’t know they were hookers”? o_O

What game did you kick that got her to agree to leave the bar/club, get in a cab with you, go buy condoms, come back with you to your hotel and give you a “Happy Ending”?

What gift of gab did you use that you felt you had gotten this chick to come home with you for free?

Did you get a clue when your boys were chipping in for the sex YOU just had? :D hahaha

Did you get a clue when there was a team of hookers outside your door, instead of the one you just kicked out? :D

This is why I’m saying this is so funny. The stories obviously don’t add up, but they *WOULD*, if dudes would just admit to the Boys’ Club.

Notice how none of the other hookers had monetary disputes?.. By some accounts, there were up to 20 of them brought back to that hotel that night, but forget about that.. If there were only the 4 prostitutes outside dude’s door, telling him to up the money, that means that 3 of them successfully completed their transactions with his homeboys.

Notice also how this situation would never have been revealed if the chick hadn’t complained to the cops that dude didn’t pay her what she thought her ***** was worth?

And then, people want to go around claiming this is an odd, one-off occurrence.

What’s even funnier is that everybody wants to call this “Bad Behavior”, as they attempt to distance themselves from what guys do every single day of life = pay women to give it up.

Membership Has Its Privileges

Several years ago, I went to visit a friend at her business office, and she introduced me to this guy I had never seen before in life, whom I gathered was footing part of the bill for the office space (read: he was tappin’ that).

We all hung out in their office that day, and then she needed to go do something, and I was chatting with the dude.

He made some outlandish remarks about her that I can’t even remember, because I was (at the time) so surprised that he was talking to me about the gal that I had come there to see, as if he and I were the long-time friends, and she was the third party.

I ended up not saying anything to her about what he said, because it seemed to me they were physically involved, and I wasn’t interested in exacerbating the situation, especially since she also relied on him for office space.

Also, it wasn’t anything that would have affected her health or well-being, or else I would have definitely let her know.

But the point was that we’re both guys.

There are lots of things guys tell other guys that they won’t tell women, regardless of what level of relationship they claim to have with them.

I’m finding this trend of bean-spilling to be strange, and I wonder if there’s an overall reason for it, or if these are merely unrelated incidents that have been occurring lately.

These aren’t gaffes, and they aren’t unforced errors… It seems that dudes are so comfortable with the Boys’ Club that they don’t give a damn if women find out about it, because there’s nothing they can do about it anyway.

It’s weird.. It’s like dudes are mentally regressing to when women didn’t have any jobs or money or could own property or create a business, and just had to sit around at their houses, hoping a suitor wanted to give them a worthwhile life instead of them becoming an “old maid” with a bunch of cats and knitting yarn.

I don’t see what the value is in paying an equally-competent woman 76 cents on the dollar, compared to a guy. (nationalpartnership.org/site/DocServer/wf.epd.factsheet.NY.pdf)

I don’t see what the value is in telling a woman a joke about women keeping their legs closed as an effective form of birth control.

I don’t see what the value is in keeping a woman with a more prestigious job than you have, and who makes more money than you do, from being a member of your club.

Sour Wingmen

Bill Cammack — Mon, 16 Apr 2012 01:20:28 +0000

So I’m watching this “reality” show, and some guys that are friends and housemates decide they’re going to go to a bar and meet some chicks.

When they get there, one of them gets a rap to a gal that, apparently, one of the other housemates there liked.

I don’t know if there was any history between her and the other guy, because this was the first episode I was seeing of the show.

So, in the confessionals (the side-interviews they do with the cast members when nobody else is around them), the extra dude is talking all kinds of trash about the guy who the girl was talking to, although, when he was there at the bar, this guy only had nice things to say about his housemate.

Off the bat, I found this to be strange. You either like people or you don’t. You either want them to get laid or you don’t. You’re happy for them to have a chance, or you aren’t.

So the dude that’s about to get on tells the chick something like “Behave yourself while I’m in the bathroom.”

Of course women are jumping up and down right now, but the relevant point here is that he was indicating his lack of self-confidence… If you’re going to lose your rap to a chick as soon as she gets out of your site, you just suck to begin with.

That also means that since you suck, she’s not going to be following your orders anyway, so you should just say “I’ll be right back” and go where you were going.

So, as soon as dude is out of sight, the chick hustles over to the wingman, hops next to him on the couch, throws her arm around his and starts kickin’ it to him.

According to the dude, she was telling him that she didn’t like his friend.

They edited the show, so we don’t know whether he put in a good word for his boy or not.

Soon afterwards, the chick is nowhere to be seen, and the wingman approaches his friend and tells him “I’m not trying to cockblock you, but your girl was coming on to me.”

This causes laughter and a shrugging-off by the housemate, as if the wingman is joking or doesn’t have a grasp on reality.

This is another sign of insecurity. What would the value be of your wingman telling you that your girl stepped to him, other than getting you information that you *SHOULD* pay attention to, and perhaps.. amp up your game?

So the dude gets the chick to come back to the house, and they bring a couple of extra women along, in case the wingman wanted one, and maybe some other dude in the house.

Instead of kickin’ it with the extra chicks, the wingman is sitting down, sulking.. Probably because he wanted the girl his boy got.

KABOOM!!!

Eventually, dude is about to finally get the girl upstairs… Unfortunately, the disgruntled, crabby, sour, bitter, salty wingman tells her something like “Go do what you’re gonna do” or “Go do what you came to do”, implying that he knew she was about to give it up, and immediately ruining the rap for his homeboy, due to the typical female “I’m not a slut” reaction.

Generally.. Women like to believe that you don’t think they ever have sex. All you need to do is imply that they’re about to give it up to trigger them into defiantly proving you wrong by *NOT* giving it up.

Unfortunately, this works even if you’re not the one that was about to get laid, so the grumpy, disgruntled wingman successfully torpedoed his boy’s action for the night.

The chick comes back and argues with him, causing the wing to remind his friend that he stepped to him in the club and told him that his girl had been hitting on him.

Of course, her response was “I wasn’t hitting on him, he was hitting on ME! :O”, which was an absolute lie, because it was all on videotape, how he was minding his own business, and she hopped on the couch and grabbed him, which she loudly denied as if her word were her bond.

This led to even more stupidity as the much-shorter and much-lighter-weight wingman got in the face of the dude whose lay he just ****** up, and ended up getting pushed into a wall. He then proceeded to almost physically cry about it and declare their friendship over… before sobering up the next day and squashing it with the dude who he successfully and deliberately cockblocked the night before.

This is what’s known as bitchassedness.

Here’s the deal.. Understand the game, or don’t play it.

If you’re going out with the fellaz to chase chicks, may the best man win. Period.

If you see a chick you like, make your move before your boy does. If she chooses him before you get your shot, you have to eat that.

Not only is it your job to STFU, but it’s your job to help him get on, INCLUDING not talking trash about him behind his back, and INCLUDING distracting the extra chicks so your boy can get some privacy with the girl you wish you had.

It’s all in the game.

Next time, if you’re the one that gets on, he’ll back your play like you backed his.

You don’t want him pulling stupid stunts while YOU’RE trying to get laid, so don’t screw up his game either. Make yourself useful and get your kicks from the SitRep in the morning. (Situation Report)

That’s not an easy lesson to learn, because it sucks the first time you don’t get the rap to a girl you wanted, and your boy gets her. It sucks the second time, and the third time, and the eighth time, and it NEVER. STOPS. SUCKING. so get over it, get used to it, and speed your game up so at least you can say you tried before she gave it up to the next man.
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Lie To Me

Bill Cammack — Fri, 23 Mar 2012 17:12:32 +0000

I don’t know when I got used to the fact that people are going to say whatever they have to say to get what they want. Not everyone, of course, but enough people that it’s worth considering that the person who just spoke to you may have just LIED to you.

Maybe it’s my fault. Maybe I did it to myself.

Back in the day, meeting chicks, we had to deal with.. let’s call it intraminority discrimination. Like, say you were Puerto Rican and wanted to hook up with a Dominican chick. It was easier and faster to tell her you were Dominican and just get to the nitty-gritty, than to say you weren’t and potentially have to have some unnecessary discussion about that, or have her just plain bounce.

Of course, there were guys that refused to do that, because of pride in whatever their nationality actually was, but they were the ones that made things tougher for themselves instead of going with the flow.

This is one of the reasons why, when women talk to me about these ridiculous and obvious things guys say to them when they’re dating, I’m like “That’s a lie. That’s a lie. That’s a lie too.” because it’s the same lie I would have told her back in the day, if I would have been trying to hit it.

It’s All In The Game

Then again, it probably wasn’t my fault. As a guy, who is culturally considered to be responsible for initiating social contact, you hear so many lies from girls and women that you just get used to it and dismiss anything they say off the bat.

My favorite example of that is that a homeboy of mine were hanging out in this bar, but not speaking to each other. We decided to compare notes, eventually, and found out that we had kicked it to the same chick and she had told us two entirely different stories about who she was, because she was sweating him and she wasn’t interested in hooking up with me.

I mean, different lies to different guys in the same place! :D haha Not even waiting until the next day to change her story. Not even changing locations. Just blatantly lying, because a) she felt like it, and b) it’s a free country.

Then there are the lies that occur during the dating process. You’re kickin’ it with a chick and she tells you she’s not going to give you any tonight.. as if you asked her for sex to begin with, so, obviously, SHE’S thinking about it since she’s the one bringing it up, and then a few hours later, she hops on you.

If you’re not used to lies, you take her word that she’s not going to hook up with you, which becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, because you start doing things other than focusing on her, and you miss your cue when she throws it at you.

If you’re used to it, you just lift your head in her direction, like “Yeah.. Sure”, and keep enjoying your evening, because what she said isn’t worth anything anyway… If she feels like giving you some, she will.. REGARDLESS of what she says about it beforehand.

Excuses

Then, there are the “drunken personality shift” lies.

Those don’t actually count as lies, because the chick means what she says when she’s talking to you and she’s sober, but her mind changes entirely when she gets drunk, as if you’re talking to a brand new chick.

If you’re not used to drunk chicks, you’ll be confused about how come this chick that just vetoed the action is now climbing up on you and feeling you up.

If you’re used to it, you go “Oh.. She’s drunk now” and you relate to the drunk version like you always do.

The second part of that, though, is that you have to learn *NOT* to act towards the sober version the same way you do towards the drunk version. Like, don’t remind her what y’all did last night, because she probably uses alcohol to convince herself that she’s “not that type of girl”, and you don’t want to tell Jack that he IS Tyler Durden.

If *SHE* brings it up, let her know what a good time you had with her. If she doesn’t, let it slide until she puts herself back in state and presses up on you again.

Then there are the “This is the reason I’m not going to hook up with you” lies. Those are more lies to herself than they are to you, but the result is the same. You’ll get thrown off your game if you fall for the okey-doke.

Listen to what she said and remember it, but don’t act like it means anything when she changes her mind. That’s the whole point. It’s all about Free Will. When she wants to hook up with you, she will, regardless of what she told you before.

Those lies include the typical “I have a boyfriend”, “I’m on my period”, “I’m a lesbian”, blah blah blah

Of course, Ladies.. Y’all can apply most of this information to dudes as well, except for the part about us needing to utilize alcohol to convince ourselves that we wouldn’t have hooked up with you sober, because there’s no negative connotation associated with calling a guy a slut.

Men lie to women as much as women lie to men, only, women are better at it.

What Had HAPPENED Was…

The bottom line is that “The Truth” is revealed in time.

YouTube Link => youtu.be/lPT2y4nnSmo

It might be a short amount of time or a long amount of time, assuming you remain in contact with that person.

You remain attracted to each other or you don’t. You remain friends or you don’t. You keep hanging out IRL or you don’t. You remain social media contacts or you don’t. That’s when you get to look back and say either “That person was true to their word”, or “That person was full of it.”

Of course, hindsight doesn’t do you any good in real-time.

I suppose all you can do is weigh the heights and depths of the pros and cons of whether they’re telling you the truth or lying to you and attempt to make an educated decision.

Like.. How bad is it going to be if they’re lying to you vs. how good it might be if they’re telling you the truth.. or, vice versa if the “truth” they’re telling you means you’re going to have less of a good time instead of more of one.

Let’s say she tells you she’s not going to hook up with you and then she actually doesn’t. Does that make it a waste of your night? o_O or, did you really enjoy spending time with her, the only thing being that you didn’t end up getting on?

Then, let’s say she tells you she’s not going to do it and then she does. Good thing you stayed in the pocket, right? :D

Let It Ride

Of course you might consider it a cynical, jaded, bitter view to consider people guilty until proven innocent, but it’s just reality. People’s word doesn’t mean **** until it’s backed up by historical reference.

Hindsight is the only potential measure, and even THAT isn’t guaranteed to tell you who the person is/was or why they were acting that way towards you.

That’s why it’s not worth thinking about.. At least if you’re the type of person that lives a dynamic life and is always meeting new people.

If you know one set of people, vet them, figure out who’s real and who’s fake. Keep the real people, eject the fake ones and enjoy your life. :)

Personally, I just roll with the vibe I get from new people I meet. Some seem legit, and others, “not so much”. It doesn’t take me long to figure it out. I have enough experience with liars at this point to figure out pretty quickly who’s who.

In fact, they often give themselves away as they seem to be paying extra attention to you, like they’re trying to figure out whether you fell for the lie or not.

As you can imagine, dealing with fake people becomes rather exhausting, so it’s a good idea to curate a group of real people that you know understand how life really works so you can have real, honest, heartfelt, serious, important discussions with them, as opposed to engaging in typically frivolous banter and drivel.
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