Bill Cammack

Here’s a tip for the married guys and guys with relationships, girlfriends, what have you…
You really should have a pretty regular Date Night scheduled with your woman.

Bill Cammack – “Date Night”

Available Formats: Audio (.mp3)

Sponsor: Bill Cammack

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Lindz & Bill return just in time to save your relationship with the Top Ten Valentine’s Day DON’Ts!!!

L = Lindsey Chen

B = Bill Cammack

1. Don’t FORGET

B: If Saturday, February 14th, 2009 rolls around and you’re Cold Lampin’ on the couch with the remote, your brew and some chips, you just blew it. Valentine’s Day will either make or break your coming year with your girl. Whatever you do or don’t do, she’s going to carry that with her for MONTHS.

You still have two weeks left, so think ahead… If you need to hit Chinatown and put that bracelet on layaway… make it happen. Also, make those restaurant reservations NOW! You’ll never hear the end of it if y’all get jerked at the door and you end up in the bootleg, sharing a 40 and a snack box for V-Day dinner.

L: Totally. Once I dated this guy who forgot about Valentines Day… and took me to a crappy diner. Meanwhile the whole time I’m thinking is, “is this guy for real?” As if I am going to fall for that BS. I dumped him immediately. Ladies, if this happens to you, its not only a jerk move, but its an indication of your future. Right now he’s forgetting about Valentine’s Day, but soon it will be your birthday, you date on Saturday night, the money he owed you for rent, the ice cream bars you asked him to pick up from the store, the list goes on.

2. Don’t order first

B: When the waitress comes over, don’t go “YEAH, I WOULD LIKE…..” Show some class, and let the lady order first. If she’s not ready, tell the waitress you need some more time. NEVER order first. DO. NOT. ORDER. FIRST! hahaha :D If she insists that you order first, stay shut. This is absolutely non-negotiable. If you order first on your own, you’re a neanderthal. If you let her PRESSURE YOU into ordering first, you’re a wuss. Neither one is good, so keep it SHUT until she orders.

Don’t overdo it, though. Some guys like to try and order FOR their women. No good. Unless you know what she likes, AND what she wants right now, don’t do it. The only way to be guaranteed of doing this properly is if you ASK HER what she wants, and when the waitress comes over, you inform her “The Lady Will Have…” and order your food AFTER she takes your girlfriend’s order.

PS – I know it will be a waitress, because they don’t hire waiters in Hooters.

L: On that note, if your man takes you to Hooters, (sorry Bill), refer to #1 and D-U-M-P. Unless of course, you love hooters or you’re a hooters girl and you have to work on Valentine’s Day. If you jump the gun and order before her, that translates to, she’s just another ‘friend’ and you’re not a gentleman. Let her order first, even if it takes 10 minutes and you know what you want. On that note, open doors… ALWAYS.

3. Don’t take her to the sports bar

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Yes, I know I said “only date broke chicks”, but now, we’re talking about marriage! :D

If you’re going to get married to a chick, make *SURE* she’s got ‘mad ducats’! :D

Don’t put yourself in the screwed-up position of having to support some deadbeat chick. That went out of style with The Flintstones and The Honeymooners. Women’s Lib is in FULL EFFECT… YA HEARD? Chicks have their own jobs… Chicks have their own money…. They’re even allowed to own land now. There’s no reason why you can’t find yourself a *RICH* chick to get married to. None.

You may have to do a little bullshitting, because chicks like to hook up with guys that are more successful than they are. Go hang out at the country club. Order an overpriced water and act like you’re drinking vodka. Drop a lot of references to your yacht and the several homes you own around the world. You know the drill. ;)

Anyway…

Now, there are two types of rich chicks you can go for. There’s the self-made rich chick that is educated and has her own career and has done what she’s needed to do to elevate her lifestyle to the lap of luxury. All props and credit to those women! :D … Then, there’s the type that’s rich because either her father or her ex-husband worked A LOT, and she’s become the beneficiary of their labor. It all depends on what you plan to do with her money, which kind of rich chick you want to go for….

If you want to keep her money to yourself, marry the rich, self-made chick. The higher she gets in her career, the more hours she’s going to have to spend working. This means you get to drive her fancy luxury car back and forth to the store to pick up the latest video games on her credit card. In this case, you’re basically the butler, Jeeves. It’s your job to pick her up from work after you chilled all day, drive her to the restaurant for dinner, since your ass probably can’t cook worth a damn, drive her back home and pamper her for about an hour before she falls asleep since she needs to get up early to go make you some more money in the morning. So, basically, by ‘working’ between 6 and 10pm every day, the equivalent of a part-time job, you enjoy all the luxuries she’s working so hard to make available to you. This works best with chicks you have no intention of having sex with.

OTOH… >:D … If you actually ENJOY her company and want to hang out with her and hit it, etc… then make sure you get one of those beneficiary-chicks. The bad thing about trust fund chicks and divorcees is that they’re spending their money faster than YOU’RE spending their money! :O The good thing about them is that they don’t actually have to waste time going to GET that money, so you have loads of time to hang out with them all day, every day! :D Paris on a Tuesday? No problem! :D Tavern On The Green on Thursday afternoon? No problem! :D

Fortunately, even though the divorce/cheating rates hover around 50% to 60%, there are still a bunch of dummies that get married without prenuptial agreements, so there are tons of divorcees around. um…. And don’t think I’m talking about old-ass chicks, either! :D Check out what Wikipedia has to say about Marriageable Age in Utah! :O

Utah: 18 generally for first marriage, 16 with parental consent, 14 with court approval or previous marriage.

… um…. Previous marriage *BEFORE* 14? :/ …. Anyway, you see what I’m getting at. By the time those chicks are divorced, they’ll just be turning legal age. By the time they’re divorced for the second or third time, they’ll be the age they would have been if they had graduated college…. *IF* they had gone to school past the 4th grade, when they got married the first time :/ So that’s two alimony checks, and the chick’s dumb as a box of rocks!…..

SWEET!!! :D

DatingGenius

Dude… Where’s the effin’ Restaurant?, originally uploaded by Bill Cammack.

Mike swore up and down that he knew where the restaurant was….. :/

March 26, 2007

Only date broke chicks!!! :D

The less money a gal has access to, the better. I mean her money, her family’s money, her ex-boyfriend’s money, whatever.

Broke chicks can’t afford to change themselves. No plastic surgery, no nose-jobs, nothing. WYSIWYG!

What
You
See
Is
What
You
Get! :D

Also, broke chicks are appreciative when you take them to the fast food restaurant. They’re glad to go ANYWHERE that they wouldn’t have spent what little money they have on. Actually, all you have to do is take them to the supermarket. They’ll be glad to *COOK* :O whatever goodies you pick up! So instead of fast food, you pick up a couple packages of shrimp and some cocktail sauce and head back to the cribbo! :D

You seem ambitious to broke chicks even if you’re a slacker because you still have more money than they do. :)

If you have an argument in the middle of the night with a broke chick, she’ll still stay over and you might get the chance to hit it, because she can’t afford a cab and doesn’t want to be in the subway system for like three hours @ 2AM! :D

Broke chicks never go anywhere unless a guy takes them there. This way, ANYPLACE you take her, she’s really going to enjoy it. Taking her to City Island (The Bronx, NY) is pretty much the same thing as taking her to Las Vegas or Disney World! :D

All the way around, broke chicks are the move. They’re actually as pretty as they look when you meet them and everything physical about them is REAL! :D They can’t even afford that clown makeup that chicks like to use. They’re naturally pretty, appreciative and enjoy spending time with you…

What else could a brotha ask for? :D

DatingGenius