Who’s The Leader In Your Relationship?

ok.. So I’m listening to this conversation that Danielle Ricks hosted, and the gist of it was whether men (in general) were looking for strong women and I hear several times from several people, male & female, something to the effect of a woman “letting” a man lead in the relationship.

This is a very basic, yet fundamental problem, and women need to cut it out, ASAP.


If you’re in the army, and woman has a particular rank and a man has a lower rank than she does, he doesn’t get to override her opinions… about ANYTHING. NUTH-THANG!… NOTHING!… NEVER. Case Closed, Done Deal, It’s a WRAP! She outranks him, so by the codes that they live and fight by, he has to take orders from her or peel potatoes in the brig.

There’s a reason why the woman gets to tell the man what to do. She’s put in the work to achieve the rank she’s achieved and he hasn’t achieved that rank, so that’s that. Unfortunately, people don’t tend to apply this simple logic to relationships. Continue reading “Who’s The Leader In Your Relationship?”

Time, Part 03: “Office Hours”

Continued from “Time, Business & Handouts [Time, Part 1]” and “Time, Part 02”

Liz Copic & Bill CammackOne of the by-products of this startup culture we live in is that people don’t know when to buzz the %*^& off.

I know this because I’ve been living that lifestyle for a couple of years now. The only thing that matters is that the job isn’t finished yet. Whatever you have to do to finish it and however long it takes, that’s what you need (and to a masochistic degree, WANT) to do.

No. I do not want to go out for a drink with you. I want to implement a new feature on my site. Going out with you is a waste of my time, *AND* it’s just pushing me further back in finishing the project that’s bringing me an actual ROI in the future.

The other day, I was awake @ 3 am and I thought about something I needed to talk to some company about. I looked their number up on the web and called them. I was actually ANNOYED at the fact that I was going to have to wait until maybe 7 am to speak to them! hahaha THE NERVE!!!

That’s the life we live. “There are four hours until I can do what I want to do”, as opposed to “You know what? Just because I’m awake and functional doesn’t mean anybody else IS or NEEDS TO BE”.

Social Media

All this connectivity makes it even worse. There are too many ways for people to monitor your online presence and think they have an opportunity to grab at your time. You ignore their phone calls and they text you. You ignore their texts and they email you. You ignore their emails and they call your other phone. You ignore their voicemail and the look for you on Facebook… or MySpace or AIM/iChat or Twitter or Pownce or Jaiku or on your website or in Ning communities or in forums or bulletin boards…….

It would be laughable if it weren’t so utterly pathetic. 🙂 It’s like they’re going “How dare he post on Twitter when he didn’t return any of my calls? :O” “How dare he go out partying and post 35 pictures on the net when my project deadline is coming up? :O” Well… That’s just the thing. It’s *YOUR* deadline until you pay me to make it MY business at all. MY job is to have a good time. Period. If I elect to stop having a good time and help you accomplish YOUR goals in return for some of your money, then that’s business. Other than that, anything I tell you that helps you out is. a. FAVOR.

Another thing about this is that just because you see me on Twitter @ 4 am, that doesn’t mean I’m interested in or willing to discuss ANYTHING about your business with you. This isn’t the help desk. This isn’t live customer support from India. If I can help out and choose to, good for you. If I choose not to, that’s how it went. Continue reading “Time, Part 03: “Office Hours””

Perian v 1.1.3 ‘breaks’ incoming iChat video

If you’re using iChat for video chatting on a mac and you also use Perian to handle video codecs, you may have noticed that suddenly, your video shows to the person you’re chatting with, but you can’t see them at all. You get the connect sound, and you can hear them, but your video screen never becomes the small box and reveals their video to you.

The solution to this problem for me was to uninstall Perian v 1.1.3 and then download and install Perian v 1.1.2.

The exact steps:
1 ) go to system preferences
2 ) select “Perian” from your “other” section at the bottom
3 ) in the “General” tab, click “Remove Perian”
4 ) Click here to download Perian v 1.1.2
4a) scroll to the bottom of the page
4b) click the link that says Download Perian Version 1.1.2 (File Size: 2.6M)
4c) here is the actual link: Download Perian Version 1.1.2

5 ) open “Perian_1.1.2.dmg”
6 ) open “Perian.prefPane”
7 ) click “ok” on the confirmation notification that pops up
8 ) give your pasword
9 ) click “Install Perian”
10) you should see “Installed Version 1.1.2”

That’s it. You’ve rolled back Perian to the previously perfectly-working-with-iChat version. You will get a message eventually, saying that there’s a new version of Perian available, v 1.1.3. Select “skip this version”.

I found out about this fix @ http://discussions.apple.com/thread.jspa?messageID=8667850 and it worked for me immediately. 🙂


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