How to *NOT* be a creep

The way the dating game works, guys have to be the aggressors and girls choose from the suitors who present themselves. There are several reasons for this, including women attempting to avoid the stigma of being considered hoes for stepping up front and telling a guy what they really want to do with him. Another reason is that gals tend to be more relationship-based, while guys are more get-laid-based.

What this creates is an uneven playing field where guys are always playing offense and girls are always playing defense. I had a rare opportunity, recently, to watch a creep operate… Let me back up a bit…

What/Who is a Creep?

Creep?A creep isn’t defined by tactics. A creep is defined by whether a chick wants to kick it to him or not. If a girl likes you, you can say just about anything you want to her, and she’ll go for it. She wants you to want her. She’s excited that she excites you. You can literally walk up to a chick and say “The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain” and she’ll make out with you, because that’s what she’s been daydreaming about this whole time since she first saw you…. kissing you, not you saying some corny, meaningless line.

So, a creep is a guy that a chick DOESN’T want to talk to her, but insists on talking to her anyway. He could be the most polite, well read, gentlemanly blah blah blah but if she’s not interested, he’s a nuisance that she needs to get rid of ASAP. Not only is he annoying, but he’s taking up space where a guy that she REALLY wants to meet could be standing and she could be enjoying herself.

So I had been about to say “I recently got to see a creep operate”, but that’s not actually true. I’ve seen creeps operate lots of times, except they’ve been friends of mine, so I’ve been hoping that they get on. Sometimes, the creep was ME! 😀 What I should have said was that I had the rare opportunity to watch some creep I don’t know operate, and because of that, I can now write up my favorite tips on how to *NOT* be a creep: Continue reading “How to *NOT* be a creep”

Blog Moderation & Damage Control

A year ago, on January 06, 2008, I wrote and posted “Do NOT Tamper With Your Comments!”. At the time, I offered “Turn On Moderation” as an alternative:

Bill: “Turn On Moderation – Make it so that NOBODY’S comments make it to personalblog or widgetblog unless YOU approve them. That way, when everything ends up positive, you just look like you spun the situation by only letting the comments through that you liked. This is DIFFERENT from changing people’s posts because there’s never anything negative for people to see in the first place, AND dissenting comments don’t become agreeing comments with the same person’s name on the top, posted at the exact same time.”

I wrote that line at a time when I wasn’t doing a lot of commenting on other people’s blogs. I hadn’t achieved a perception of the potential effects of “You *just* look like you spun the situation by only letting the comments through that you liked” on people who visit your blog and make comments that never get approved. Let me tell you about it.

Initial Perception

Mike, Kfir & BillInitially, when I check out a blog for the first time, I’m thinking that the person who wrote the posts is looking for A DISCUSSION. I’m thinking that if they didn’t want A DISCUSSION, they would have turned off comments.

Actually, one of the very first times I ever posted on someone else’s blog, it was a dating blog and the woman had written flawed advice. With my naive way of thinking about blogs as sort of “personally-hosted forums”, I wrote a nice long comment about what was incorrect about her ideas. To her credit, she emailed me my words, when she could have just deleted them. Hats Off to her for that. 🙂 My ideas could have been lost in space, because I had written them directly to her blog entry form. Last time I ever did *THAT*.

She emailed me my words and explained to me that she wasn’t going to host my ideas about her post on HER site, and if I wanted to, I should place them on MY site. At the time, I wasn’t hip to trackbacks and pingbacks. I had a short email discussion with her expressing my opinion that I thought she was lame for having a blog and ONLY approving comments that made her look good. Pretty soon after that, I found out that this is pretty much status quo. She represents the mainstream and I’m “odd man out” on this issue. Continue reading “Blog Moderation & Damage Control”